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husband changing plans

(7 Posts)
probablygrumpy Wed 25-Jan-17 21:53:59

OK I am pretty sure Iabu but I need some perspective.

My annual leave finishes in April so I have time to take in march. We had planned a week off together but as I'm now pregnant husband wants to keep his AL for when the baby is here. (So now have a week off solo-fine).

I work alternate weekends and worked easter both may and August BH last year.
This year Easter off. Had planned to visit DH family for long weekend in a beautiful place a long way away.

However now his friends have invited him away for a boys weekend. He wants to go and I have said he should as after the baby is here there will be less opportunities for this.

But I'm upset now as It feels like he won't use AL to hang out with me but will with them. He also intends to attend a stag when I'm probably about 7+months . All in all it seems I get to sit home sober and alone while he galavants having a blast. He's generally super, has been great while I've been knackered and is considerate. It just seems if I ask him not to go he wouldn't but then I'm spoiling his fun for no real reason.

Sorry so long. Any advise wise mn ?

scottishdiem Wed 25-Jan-17 21:59:07

Maybe the hormones making you U?

He is using AL responsibly. To hang out with your and the new baby. Can you not use your AL to go to that place a long way away?

PatriciaHolm Wed 25-Jan-17 21:59:41

If his boys weekend is over Easter, then he won't need AL, will he? Your post suggests he wasn't taking AL but coming away with you over the long Easter weekend, but now he's using those days to go somewhere with his friends instead. So no AL needed? Or is he taking some especially for the friends weekend?

He's got 2 weekends away lined up, not exactly galavanting all through your pregnancy. I think your hormones may be blowing this up into a bit more than it is really, if this isn't a general pattern of him being away a lot/inconsiderate.

frozenfairy123 Wed 25-Jan-17 22:03:29

U need to organise some jollies of your own with friends and let him have his time. Everything changes when the baby comes along xx

probablygrumpy Wed 25-Jan-17 22:04:28

I suspected iabu. He is using one or 2 days for the boys weekend thing and probably 1 day for the stag. If we go see his family then no AL.

I could go see them solo but I'd probably feel a bit odd staying without him as lovely as his family is.

I think it's more I feel I've been dumped for a better offer. I suspect hormones perhaps at work.

He is generally great and I am trying to hide my upset.

missymayhemsmum Wed 25-Jan-17 23:46:19

Sounds like he is getting in some 'lads time' before becoming a father, but hasn't twigged that this could also be the last chance you get to have a break away as a couple for a year or two. YANBU to be a bit miffed and sad about that

scottishdiem Thu 26-Jan-17 00:58:10

Did he view the trip to his parents as you did - "long weekend in a beautiful place"? Is he from there or has he been many many times? Or is it a place that doesnt hold much interest for him in that way?

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