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To be so annoyed at him not liking films, dramas, comedies

(26 Posts)
roastednut Wed 25-Jan-17 21:16:23

This is possibly a bit odd and silly but genuinely want to know AIBU. My DH won't watch TV unless it sport. I love dramas, films, comedy most stuff really. I'm not a telly addict and i do lots of other things, but I love to watch a good film or drama now and again. He hates the cinema and when we do go (which is rare these days) he falls asleep with 10 mins. Same with theatre. Obviously I now do all those sorts of things with friends.

The thing is I occasionally get excited about something on telly and would love us to watch together, he sometimes says ok he'll give it a go, and within minutes he's on his laptop or phone looking at social media or sports stuff.

Realise there are much worst things in life but genuinely AIBU to feel disappointed by this?! Interested in your views on this.
(I should add this dislike of his got significantly worse after we got married - whilst he would never suggest watching something together in the early days, he did used to be a bit more interested in these sorts of things)

harderandharder2breathe Wed 25-Jan-17 21:57:51

Why do you need to watch them together? You don't need to watch sport if you don't enjoy it and he doesn't need to watch programs he doesn't enjoy either.

Go to the cinema or theatre with friends and watch tv on your own or with him in the room but not watching

ShelaghTurner Wed 25-Jan-17 22:03:53

God I love the fact that DH doesn't like the same things I do. It means he gets to take the dds up to bed when I want to watch my things and I can go and do something more interesting when he's watching his. Sitting through something you don't like is maddening.

Hellmouth Wed 25-Jan-17 22:04:16

OP, I'd be a bit disappointed too if DP wouldn't watch something with me. We tend to find one programme we're really interested in and watch that together. Apart from that, we watch different things.

Cherryskypie Wed 25-Jan-17 22:05:42

It's not his thing. Unless he's actively disrupting your viewing what's the problem?

liz70 Wed 25-Jan-17 22:06:12

What are you doing on here, Mum? confused grin

Chops2016 Wed 25-Jan-17 22:07:57

I don't see the issue, it isn't worth getting annoyed about. He isn't obliged to share your hobbies/tastes.

Like your hubby I am not bothered about TV, either. Never go to the cinema, don't even have a TV licence as never watch it. Id feel quite frustrated if my DH kept trying to get me to watch things I'm not interested in, especially if he then got annoyed I didn't sit there like a good girl and watch it without looking at my phone or anything even though I was bored witless.

I'm sure you aren't into all the things he is into? Does he pressure you to 'get into' any of his hobbies?

Oysterbabe Wed 25-Jan-17 22:10:25

My DH is exactly the same. I actually quite enjoy football these days but I feel like he makes no effort at all to watch things I want to watch, just doesn't give them a chance. I'll suggest we watch a really good film together but he'll be fucking around on Twitter within minutes then will later claim he gave up on it because he couldn't follow what was going on angry

YouTheCat Wed 25-Jan-17 22:19:22

I think that would piss me off a bit. There's some things dp likes that I'm not as keen about but I watch and join in, and vice versa really. If he only had one topic of conversation I'd find him a bit dull.

user1477282676 Wed 25-Jan-17 22:19:53

You just have different interests. Stop hassling the poor man. He doesn't have to enjoy the same things as you do.

Bluntness100 Wed 25-Jan-17 22:24:22

I'm not seeing the issue, I don't like watching football or golf. Can't imagine If my husband wanted me to sit there watching it with him, I'd be bored shitless, I'd rather eat my own liver. Same as some things I want to watch, I don't expect him to.

You must have more shared interests than watching the telly together? 🙄

SparklyLeprechaun Wed 25-Jan-17 22:26:27

My DH likes formula 1. I'd rather stick pins in my eyes than watch it and I don't think I'd last for 5 minutes before turning to my laptop.
Equally, I go to the opera with friends, I could drag DH but I know it's not his thing.

Each to their own I say.

jcne Wed 25-Jan-17 23:06:56

hmmmm yes and I end up feeling ashamed/guilty that I just want to sit down and turn my brain off for a while 😒😕

donajimena Wed 25-Jan-17 23:14:38

Are you my OH? In disguise? I bloody hate TV and films and struggle to watch it. Its a major bone of contention that he seems to think I have to watch something with him.
I spend a lot of my time on my phone but not on social media or group chat. Usually its a news site or MN.
We do watch some stuff together but it has to be something that really grabs my interest.
I find it quite difficult that a grown man is unable to watch a TV programme unless I am an active participant confused
I just don't get how someone can feel neglected if I am sat next to them reading slow cooker recipes whilst they are watching Band of Brothers

Tink06 Wed 25-Jan-17 23:39:17

Yanbu. My oh is obsessed with sport. I dont mind in moderation but we end up sat in different rooms every night. I like some space but it honestly feels like he doesn't want to sit with us. He shuts himself in the nice TV room with the comfy sofa to himself while everyone else, including his mum is sat in the other room so I'm also helping kids with homework, making cups of tea, sorting his mum out, putting youngest to bed etc
One of his most annoying habits, especially when choosing a film we can all watch is dismissing other peoples choices, choosing a compromise and the n falling asleep about half an hour in.

notangelinajolie Wed 25-Jan-17 23:46:36

You can borrow my DH. He won't watch anything other than films, even films he's seen 10 times before. I like watching anything live even football is better than the bloody Shawshank Redemption for the zillionth time. He's scrolling through Netflix as I type zzzzzzzzzzzzz.

arethereanyleftatall Wed 25-Jan-17 23:51:14

Yabu. How often do you watch the cricket because he wants you to? Probably never, and why would you, it's not interesting for you. It's the same for him. He could be saying exactly the same thing on dads-net.

HandbagCrazy Thu 26-Jan-17 00:08:56

YABU. I understand why you want him to watch things with you but you are being unreasonable to be upset because he doesn't want to.

In our house, we have very few things that we watch together. I have 1 or 2 things DH will sit through and vice versa although we will both go on our iPads/phones if we're not interested. I can't imagine having to sit through a whole episode of gold rush without having access to mn or Pinterest to distract me!
I have a very long list of programmes I like that I can only watch when he's not around and so does he bloody wheeler dealers and formula one.

If you want to sit together and watch something, have you tried watching a sport with him?

Araminta99 Thu 26-Jan-17 01:55:39

YANBU. It must be so frustrating to not be able to share films you enjoy with your husband. I was friends with a couple and she was into art, culture and museums and he wouldn't even humour her. She was excited to see an archaeological exhibition and asked him if he'd go with her. "Why would you want to look at a lot of old bones?" He replied. Unfortunately they split up in the end, they were just too different. Though as you are married I wouldn't suggest that!

Can you sit down and tell him how you feel? Tell him how much it would mean to you to sit together and enjoy a film. After all you do for him it's hardly too much to ask.

NancyCarolinesTorch Thu 26-Jan-17 02:15:09

In the nicest way possible, YAB a teeeeny bit U. As PPs have said, you can't force interest on someone. I myself am aware that I have the attention span of a gold fish- unless a film or programme has fully captivated me I can't focus. If I tried to watch a film I wasn't interested in I'd be asleep in minutes!
I know lots of couples who watch certain things together- but also plenty who watch shows separately. I think sitting in the same room with one watching and one on the ipad is actually quite a nice compromise.
Give him a break. Not having much interest in stuff you want to watch is no reflection on your relationship... but trying to force him into spending his leisure time on something he doesn't like would be.

TheMysteriousJackelope Thu 26-Jan-17 03:00:10

DH binge watches Gold Rush, Crab Catchers, and Wicked Tuna. I just go in another room and make quilts. I already know more than I need to about the inner workings of Big Red and where Tony Beets goes during the off season.

At least it keeps me productive.

captainproton Thu 26-Jan-17 03:19:45

I don't much like TV and have not for most of my life, if DH tried to force me to watch one of his light entertainment or soaps I would question our relationship.

We do things together on two nights a week. Probably a board game or...

I will watch Endeavour with him, apart from that I doubt I will watch anything this week.

Music is my thing.

Anyway he is who he is, he's just not into TV. DH alwAys says at least he gets to watch all his soaps, and him DSS can watch talent shows to their hearts content!

scottishdiem Thu 26-Jan-17 03:36:42

DP and I dont do TV together and our cinema experiences can also be separated depending on the film.

I would hate to make DP watch things that they dont like and DP would hate to make me watch things I dont like so you are a bit U to be complaining about it. You are, in effect, try to create a false togetherness which is a shitty way to do marriage I think. DP and I do a lot of things together like finding nice coffee shops together and going for a drive or taking the dogs for a walk or going for a meal (even a Wetherspoons breakfast on a Sunday with the Sunday papers where we debate the major stories). Rather than force someone to watch something they dont like, can you find something you both like to do?

Also, for those supporting OP I do hope you will support the occasional male poster we get who is sad that their wife wont do something that they dont want to do.

Bluntness100 Thu 26-Jan-17 04:28:42

>>She was excited to see an archaeological exhibition and asked him if he'd go with her<<

That's totally different though, if one of us really wanted to see something like that and asked the other to also go, we would do it. It's very different to having to sit through a football match on tv at home and act interested, or my husband having to sit there and watch criminal minds on Netflix with me.

The other night he wanted to watch spring watch. I mean seriously spring watch, it's kill your self dull. So he watched it whilst I messed around on mumsnet. However when I wanted to see the terracotta warriors exhibit, he came with me, totally different things.

Astoria7974 Thu 26-Jan-17 06:52:55

My dh was the same until I got a Netflix subscription. Now he's addicted to the Marvel shows.

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