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To feel like he should have tried harder

(15 Posts)
fledglingFTB Wed 25-Jan-17 14:25:22

DP told me a week before my birthday that he hadn't bothered to get me anything. Not even a card. Made some weak excuses, like he thought the meal (that I have organised and booked) was our 'gift to each other' hmm

We're not exactly loaded at the minute, and I've only spent £20 on him. But, I was honest and told him that it was the lack of thought that upset me.

Birthday rolls up, still no gift. I had mentioned a few suggestions.

I've now just got an email on my lunch and he's hastily bought me and him an hour in one of those Breakout rooms a month after my birthday.

I would actually rather pull out my own teeth one by one than do this. It cost 40 quid and is non-refundable angry

I have NEVER shown an interest in that kind of crap, in fact the thought of it makes me feel mildly claustrophobic. I do however know that one of his female colleagues is mad for this type of stuff, sits next to him at work and just so happened to go there for her birthday...

I'm trying to not be so f*cked off, as I know it's a stupid birthday gift. But, is it really SO hard to give a bit of consideration to your OH - AIBU?!?!

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface Wed 25-Jan-17 14:28:00

Don't go if you'd hate it.

Let him take the colleague.

NancyDonahue Wed 25-Jan-17 15:16:47

An hour on your own? Isn't he doing the with you?

xStefx Wed 25-Jan-17 15:24:20

Sorry, whats a breakout room>?

PurpleMinionMummy Wed 25-Jan-17 15:33:10

Yanbu.

fledglingFTB Wed 25-Jan-17 15:37:29

Yes it's for me and him, like a pair of sad sacks. On our todd.

A breakout room is like a budget version of the crypton factor. You get locked in a room and then you have an hour to solve the puzzle... So they let you out 😒

Dear god I was bored just typing that out.

JustSpeakSense Wed 25-Jan-17 15:40:12

It sounds as if you you'd made up your mind to dislike anything he got you tbh.

DisneyMillie Wed 25-Jan-17 15:40:28

They're really fun (imo) and maybe he thought it would be a nice to have some time together doing something different. If you've never said you would hate it then it's not really thoughtless. But it's a shame you don't like it since it is your birthday present.

xStefx Wed 25-Jan-17 15:40:58

Thankyou , I have never heard of this before. xx

yaela123 Wed 25-Jan-17 15:42:33

Happy birthday! flowers That's pretty crappy

xStefx I think it's like an escape room game type thing that I really enjoy

ChippyTea16 Wed 25-Jan-17 16:48:58

YANBU OP. Especially since you had made some suggestions, it doesn't sound like he has put much thought into it and that is really annoying. I'd be upset as well, even something free that he'd put some thought into would be better than nothing.

The only thing I can say really is I felt the same as you about the Breakout thing and I went with colleagues and it turned out to be a lot of fun, I'd definitely go again and I hate the thought of being locked in somewhere.

I'd maybe go and try and put a brave face on - you might enjoy it too in the end and you won't want to look back and realise you were being rude about it but maybe ask him to cook you your favourite dinner or something for your actual birthday? Get some wine and some cake and have a nice night in together.

Happy Birthday! x

FatBottomedGal Wed 25-Jan-17 16:52:22

I do feel for you, although I do think he's probably tried to put the effort in and treat you on your birthday. Is he usually this useless with presents?

Happy birthday by the way! cake

Babymamaroon Wed 25-Jan-17 16:58:13

I have to say I would love to do that but your DH should know it's not your thing.

Talk to him about it as YANBU.

TheNaze73 Wed 25-Jan-17 17:00:22

He got have got you lunch on the Orient express & I think you would have moaned

fledglingFTB Wed 25-Jan-17 17:03:04

Interested to hear what these assumptions are based on TheNaze73 and JustSpeakSense?

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