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AIBU to be annoyed that my bf is still friendly with my dad?

(3 Posts)
newstartamiready Tue 24-Jan-17 12:52:54

So the background is that my boyfriend was friends with my dad years before we got involved (my boyfriend is a few years older than me so no where near my dads age). My dad was very horrible towards me recently so I am not currently speaking to him. He was so nasty that I was crying my eyes out and basically had a panic attack! My boyfriend knows this but he is still speaking to my dad and has gone to help him with something today, it's a work thing and he will get paid so he's happy to do it.

I'm not trying to be a spoilt brat or anything but I feel like as my dad was so horrible and left me in such a bad state that it doesn't appear like my bf is very supportive as he is continuing with my dad as he normally would so in a way it looks like my dad hasn't done anything wrong! My dad is a narcissist and takes what he wants and if he doesn't get it becomes very horrible!

My boyfriend is a nice person and has a forgiving nature and seems to be able to take a lot more shit than I can. If someone had upset him as much as my dad upset me I'm not sure I would be happy to work with or for them. But I know I can be stubborn and I think it's because I'm guarded as I grew up with not the nicest supportive family.

So AIBU to be annoyed about this?

TheNaze73 Tue 24-Jan-17 12:56:20

I get your dilemma however I think I'd need more info before I'd say YANBU.

How long has he known your Dad?
How long have you been together?
What's the problem between you & your Dad?

If you've been together a month, he's known him 20 years & the incident was minor is vastly different to other scenarios.

newstartamiready Tue 24-Jan-17 13:02:51

He has known my dad for maybe 20years, we have been together for a year and we are moving in together within the next couple of weeks.

My dad was helping me with something and got stressed out and was being really horrible to me and shouting at me etc! I was borrowing his car at the time and he told me to get out when I was no where near my house. So I got out and walked in a panic as he had a very aggressive manor! As I said he is a narcissist and he does sometimes try to help but the few occasions he tried to help it's like he doesn't really want to do he manufactures an argument so he no longer has to help as we have then had a falling out! He could say no to helping in the first place but didn't

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