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MIL and being obese TWO

(252 Posts)
YellowBlinds Tue 24-Jan-17 10:16:14

original thread

Hi, I know a few people didn't like the title before and I'm sorry for repeating it but I figured it would be the best marker, as its what I used before confused. Honestly, no offence intended.

LaContessaDiPlump Tue 24-Jan-17 10:19:07

Fair do's op. I'm very glad that your DH heard her giving out in person; makes it much harder for her to deny it! Also if she petered out once she saw him, i think it reduces the chance of dementia and hugely increases the likelihood of twatitis.

thanks for you with the overwork - we've all been there and it is horrid!

Soubriquet Tue 24-Jan-17 10:23:15

Glad your dh is backing you up 100% and heard everything

Sorry that work is so difficult at the moment

MolyBoly Tue 24-Jan-17 10:26:42

Nice to see you OP. How are things going?

MycatsaPirate Tue 24-Jan-17 10:27:46

You sound exhausted. I'm so sorry she's still behaving like this but glad your DH was there on at least one occasion. This way she can't deny what's happened to him or say you were exaggerating.

Have you thought about a harrassment order or something? I know it's extreme and she's his mum but this could end up causing you health problems if it continues long term.

Your home should be your safe haven. Not somewhere that you stress every time the door goes.

Mix56 Tue 24-Jan-17 10:30:19

Wow. Yes excellent that DH was present to witness this behaviour.
No one really knows what she actually wants at your house yet ? neither Company nor Food, nor Dominance.
DH/FIL must tackle this soon. just the fact that you are working from dawn to midnight & have already told her you will not be available to uninvited visits due to your work load would do it for anyone lucid.

Ginkypig Tue 24-Jan-17 10:31:38

Hi yellow.

Sounds like your up to your ears in work at the moment!

I'm glad actually that she came round again because now your dh has seen how she is with you.

I still think you might be left with no choice but to move as so far she is just not taking a blind bit of notice to anything anyone says!

How did your fil and dh's chat go?

dinkystinky Tue 24-Jan-17 10:32:20

Oh yellowblinds - MIL acting like a tantrumming toddler is the last thing you need when so super busy at work. I agree with the previous poster's suggested sign to go on the door - working between 7am and [ ] so unable to answer the door - and then just ignore MIL. Glad your DH has seen first hand how terribly behaved she is towards you when he's not around.

When work calms down, I'd seriously talk to DH about moving - living quite so close to MIL clearly doesn't work because of her bat shit crazy behaviour.

laurenandsophie Tue 24-Jan-17 10:33:43

OP, she is obsessed with you and I don't think she's going to let it go. FIL absolutely has to do something. It's just not normal.
Also - good luck getting through your work!

xStefx Tue 24-Jan-17 10:35:59

yay, your back! woohoo

CuppaTeaAndAJammieDodger Tue 24-Jan-17 10:46:02

Been following from the outset - OP you really are being incredibly reserved, I applaud you. Thank goodness your DH is also aware of what's going on and not just skulking into the background and shoving his head into the sand.

TheMaddHugger Tue 24-Jan-17 10:46:22

(((((((((((Hugs)))))))))) ((((((((((((squishy Hugs)))))))))))))

TiredAndRavenous Tue 24-Jan-17 10:46:45

I'm glad your ok & your husband is still supporting you x

SmallBee Tue 24-Jan-17 10:49:07

Glad your DH was backing you up and able to see what she's like to you.
Once the product launch is done do you think you'll be able to book a couple of days away somewhere to give yourself a break?

QuimReaper Tue 24-Jan-17 10:58:42

Oh OP, I really feel for you - being completely snowed under and having to contend with her banging and screaming on the door must be getting on your last stretched nerve.

Has she been over since she was caught in the act by DH? It's so weird, on the one hand she seems completely unaware and I start thinking it has to be some kind of brain tumour or severe dementia, and then she reins it in for your DH and I think she knows exactly what she's doing confused Although she doesn't seem to care about looking like a raving psycho in front of anyone else, like NOTR or her own husband... Anyway, I hope DH and FIL get somewhere with their discussion brew

ShutTheFuckUpBarbara Tue 24-Jan-17 10:59:40

Your DH sounds great OP, it must be a very tough time for both of you.

Good luck with the product launch!

WizardOfToss Tue 24-Jan-17 11:07:20

Hi OP, glad you're (sort of) ok.

Agree that this doesn't sound like dementia now, rather thwarted will and sheer nastiness.

Hope you can resolve things to something you can live with flowers

HashiAsLarry Tue 24-Jan-17 11:07:40

Good luck with the launch. I'm sure it would be far easier if MIL wasn't howling her arse off at the door constantly.

Well done DH for trying to do something about her, albeit just chats with FIL. If she can peter out in front of DH I highly suspect this isn't dementia. However, its not fricking normal either.

AyeAmarok Tue 24-Jan-17 11:09:36

Your DH going round and having a discussion with her about normal stuff and ignoring the whole issue of the last week is very odd on both their parts.

Puzzledandpissedoff Tue 24-Jan-17 11:10:35

Whatever the outcome, somehow this sounds as if things are beginning to come together for you; in particular it's good that DH is talking with his dad about it all, and that he was there to support you on her recent visit

I also agree that her sudden ability to control herself in his presence argues against this being an actual illness of some kind. While there's a tendency to medicalize everything on MN, and while it's important to consider illness too, that doesn't alter the fact that many behave as they do because they're just plain unpleasant

It's not going to be easy, but with your DH's support I just know you'll find a way out of this flowers

SeaEagleFeather Tue 24-Jan-17 11:16:10

Your DH going round and having a discussion with her about normal stuff and ignoring the whole issue of the last week is very odd on both their parts.

This. Very, very odd of him. Just how far is he on your side here?

MolyBoly Tue 24-Jan-17 11:20:53

Did you talk to your DH about moving?

CommonFramework Tue 24-Jan-17 11:23:58

She did this again on Friday, not realising that DH was working from home too. I answered the door and she laid into me, only for DH to walk around the corner. He just stood behind me and watched her as she kind of ran out of steam, asked her very calmly to wait for us to contact her, as we're both working right now and scarpered back home.

So she CAN stop her bonkers behaviour when your dh is present?

Why on earth didn't your h say something to her then? And why did he go to see her at the weekend and not talk about the elephant in the room? That'll make her think he's on her side and 'normalises' her insane behaviour. Your h needs to talk to her ASAP!

Mummyoflittledragon Tue 24-Jan-17 11:25:02

Hi Yellow. Glad to see you back. Sort of. Bizarre that your dh went round and mentioned nothing. Did he have any explanation? Or is he just so brow beaten?

EssentialHummus Tue 24-Jan-17 11:26:19

yellow I'm glad you and DH are standing strong on this. Sounds like you will have more time to think and reflect about next steps once the work levels are under control.


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