I have this best friend (will call him Joe) is one of two of my closest/longest friends. Other friend we will call Ann. She's lovely but very nervous.
DP organised my birthday this year. Tried to organise a surprise being time away just the two of us, my DM looked after DC and we then were to spend today with friends.
I found out accidentally/DP is terrible at keeping things a secret but I appreciated it so much all the same.
I've really enjoyed the weekend so far but last week Joe started putting pressure on to invite another friend to the activity planned for today. This female friend had upset me a long time ago and I tried not to hold onto that and can get on with her but for the sake of my birthday DP had only invited my two closest friends (he's actually only invited Ann but when I found out I said it would be cool to have Joe too).
He insisted he would be speaking to friend (who is also his ex) every day and she would feel left out.
I didn't want to say no necessarily but it felt like he didn't want to come unless she was there. I felt rather put out by it to be honest.
He really wanted to come and stay at mine with her but DP had already booked somewhere for us to stay and said yes to his DSis to stay at ours as she had an event to attend nearby. As we weren't going to be in for a majority he said yes. I said to Joe there wouldn't be room with SIL staying and I was sorry I didn't realise he'd already said yes.
He then said he wasn't sure he could come. Now he's travelled down nearby to see another friend and is saying he has to return before seeing us as planned. I had said if his ex wanted to come up she could but obviously nobody could stay at mine. Ann is trying to travel from her home today but nervous driver plus weather today I don't want to push her. Ex girlfriend of Joe isnt coming and Joe is now going home.
Sorry if this is all confusing but this is my aibu.
I think Joe is using me a bit here.
He is always trying to come see me but only with his ex. Never on his own. Knowing she has upset me and not apologised for this.
I think he's back with her and wants to use my place as a shag pad. He still has another ex living with him, his parents and his exes parents don't agree with their relationship so they can't stay together in his house or their parents houses...
the thing is I don't apreciate them using my house for this purpose when he can't be bothered to do something with me for my birthday as opposed to an excuse to sleep with his ex. (It also creeps me out regardless)
Aibu? Should I just ignore it or do you all think he's trying to use my place for his own reasons too?
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AIBU?
I think my friend is using me
19 replies
Crapfriends · 23/01/2017 10:48
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