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To not cut my sons hair?

(39 Posts)
MadJeffBarn Wed 18-Jan-17 16:09:34

My son is 2, and has beautiful thick curly hair. It's down past his shoulders, but we get his fringe cut so he can see. Nearly everyone wants me to get it cut and it's really starting to get frustrating. His curls are baby curls, and I know that once it's cut they're not coming back, and I'm just not ready to let go of that babyness yet. It's not in the way and he doesn't mind it. My mil is the worst, nearly everytime i see her (which is usually at least twice a week) tells me it's needs cutting and I'm starting to lose my temper with it. His dad wants it cut too, but not like a 'big boy' haircut and doesn't seem to understand that once you cut the curls away they're gone forever. I even found out that my step mother in law had to stop my fil from taking him to the hairdresser themselves which makes me reluctant to let them take him out! I am funny with hair, I admit that, but surely this is my decision? It's not hurting anyone!

Crispbutty Wed 18-Jan-17 16:13:03

My curls always came back confused

JohnLapsleyParlabane Wed 18-Jan-17 16:13:54

YANBU He's big enough to tell you when he wants it cut. Get your OH on board and make it clear that no one cuts your sons hair until you and his dad decide to.

CasperGutman Wed 18-Jan-17 16:14:01

Oh, FFS, just let the poor lad have a bit of a trim! It doesn't have to be a short back and sides.

Headofthehive55 Wed 18-Jan-17 16:14:14

Nobody's business but yours and your partner.

lightcola Wed 18-Jan-17 16:15:35

My son has long hair and we love it. I ask him if he wants it short and he says no. When he decides he wants it shorter we'll cut it but for now it's staying as it is.

PrettyBotanicals Wed 18-Jan-17 16:17:56

You're certainly not hurting anyone but you can't be naive enough to expect that long curly hair on a bit of two might well provoke comment.

Also, why doesn't his dad's opinion count for anything at all with you?

I wasn't bothered what anyone thought but I lived in a country where boys usually had quite long hair.

I have friends in this country who found the comments intolerable, whose partners felt it was inappropriate and others who, frankly, relished the attention.

SantasLittleMonkeyButler Wed 18-Jan-17 16:19:13

My friend has a 6 year old son who's never had a hair cut. Not even a fringe trim.

Part almost all of the reason for this is his grandmother's insistence that he must have his hair cut wink.

theautismdisciple Wed 18-Jan-17 16:20:36

Very personal choice I think. I hate to see boys with long hair, or girls if it's not looked after properly for that matter!

Get it cut. wink

DearMrDilkington Wed 18-Jan-17 16:21:56

Dds curls always come back, she's 4 and has had her hair trimmed several times.

Your being a bit precious about his hair.

NerrSnerr Wed 18-Jan-17 16:23:41

It's equally his dad's decision too so you need to come to an agreement.

idontwannaknow Wed 18-Jan-17 16:23:43

Don't have it cut then. My now 2 year old had curls too when it got just past his ears I had people on and on at me too about getting it cut, I really didn't want to either really but in the end I did, he looked completely different. Really grown up. He hates having his haircut an the curls have never came back and I wish I didn't cut them now too.

Just don't get it cut, say you like his curls and they'll never come back once cut and that's that for now.

ems137 Wed 18-Jan-17 16:24:32

Gosh I've loved DS having short boy hair that's no trouble to wash/brush/keep stickiness out of over my DD's.

I wouldn't choose to have my sons hair long but neither would DH. If we didn't agree then I'm not sure what would happen.

My brother had beautiful blonde curls when he was a toddler. After 2/3 years and a proper hair cut they were gone for good but why is that a bad thing?

TheMysteriousJackelope Wed 18-Jan-17 16:28:10

Are people making comments because his hair is getting in his eyes or because it looks tangly and uncared for? Also I think it's OK to see what your DS thinks about it. He may want his hair shorter, even at the age of 2.

It doesn't bother me if boys have long hair. The only problem is that when they are young they do look like girls even when they are wearing 'boy type' clothing so expect him to be spoken about as 'she' and 'her'. DD had the reverse problem. A pixie cut at age 8 and a taste for Ben 10 t-shirts had her teacher thinking she was a boy with a strange name for the first morning in her class.

MadJeffBarn Wed 18-Jan-17 16:31:20

I know I'm being precious, but it's one of the very few things I am precious about. Trust me, my dh is precious about far more things than I am in regards to the kids. I just love them, I love him hair, but his fringe is dead straight and the rest of us have straight hair so I know it'll grow straight forever. They're not proper ringlets but they have a beautiful bounce 😂 but the pressure just makes me dig my heels in more. Dh wants him to have a trim but like I said, once those curls are trimmed they're gone.

SecretNutellaFix Wed 18-Jan-17 16:32:20

I think it depends if they are easy to keep clean and neat and not get in his way when he's playing, and I would say the same to parents of little girls with long curly hair.

MadJeffBarn Wed 18-Jan-17 16:33:59

No his hair is beautiful and well looked after. If anything my daughters hair is the one that needs to be cut short, she has to just lie on it and it gets incredibly tangled, plus she hates having it brushed. My son loves his hair, he loves me brushing it and blowdrying it, he's more of a girl than his sister 😂

saoirse31 Wed 18-Jan-17 16:34:58

Surely its for u and partner to decide, once you accept his views are as valid as yours...

Mangomohito Wed 18-Jan-17 16:40:49

Yanbu, my 19 month old has long locks, they are beautiful. Some people keep banging on about getting his hair cut but we will cut it when we are ready. Luckily for me my husband agrees. Other people love his hair and say don't you dare get it cut.

I won't send him to school with long hair but for now I'm keeping my baby's precious curls.

Mangomohito Wed 18-Jan-17 16:42:55

People only want you to cut it because he's a boy. I wouldn't force a boy to have long hair, my older son has short hair but it doesn't matter for baby's.

It's more practical to get it chopped once they can sit still for a haircut.

Whatsername17 Wed 18-Jan-17 16:44:08

Only yours and your dhs opinion matters. I have a dd witg curly hair and I have to tie it up or it gets in the way. I'm impressed that your little one doesn't moan - my dd is a pain in the butt!

uglyflowers Wed 18-Jan-17 16:46:25

My 7 year old has very long hair. His choice. I've offered to cut it but he always refuses. It suits him and he is confident in his choice. He is also quite pretty and does get mistaken for a girl. He accepts that this may happen but says he isn't bothered and anyway, what's so bad about being a girl that he ought to be mistaken for one! His body, his choice.

uglyflowers Wed 18-Jan-17 16:47:34

ought to be bothered about being

Lemoncurd Wed 18-Jan-17 16:57:08

Snap uglyflowers!
Mine is exactly the same at 7. It doesn't stop other people commenting but I'm actually quite impressed by how determined he is to keep his hair long despite the comments.

Prawnofthepatriarchy Wed 18-Jan-17 17:06:02

My first DS had platinum curls and looked utterly adorable. I keep those curls until he was 3, with my DH in agreement. When I finally took him to the hairdresser he sat motionless until the man had finished and then, giving his reflection an approving little nod, he said, with great satisfaction, "Now I is a boy." Made me realise that perhaps I had kept those curls a little too long. smile

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