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To believe parents shouldn't send their kids to school ill

(82 Posts)
sailorcherries Fri 13-Jan-17 16:39:31

Before we start, I'm not talking about a cold, cough, sniffles etc. I am talking about actual illnesses and vomiting.

I teach and the amount of children who get sent to school after throwing up that morning or over the night are ridiculous! There is a clear policy which states that your child should not return until 48hrs after the last bout. Yet day after day we have kids turn up and then sent home before lunch time because we a) find out or b) they're ill again.

Today I sent kids home because they got sent in with the bloody chicken pox. Their parents noticed the spots, knew about them, and sent them anyway under the assumption that "you only get it once so it can't be". Surely it can't just be me who would take my child to the doctor instead of school if I noticed a rash like that? They'd been there for a few days apparently.

Not only does it not help your child but it compromises the other children and staff there, some of whom will have immune disorders or may be pregnant etc.

I understand finding childcare can be hard, but actually sending an ill/infected child to school just seems so ridiculous. Aibu to be annoyed and being so annoyed by this? Obviously if spots appear at school or they get sick at school it's a different story but when they know and do nothing, it grinds my gears.

GreenAndWinter Fri 13-Jan-17 16:46:38

It winds me up too. Ds1's classmate threw up all over him the other day, so now my family is poorly too. I'm a childminder, and this kind of thing can cost me a lot of much-needed income. It also inconveniences the parents of all the other children I look after.

sailorcherries Fri 13-Jan-17 16:50:15

It's just the sheer thoughtlessness for other people that annoys me.

I understand taking time off work to find someone to look after your child while you work, or to look after them yourself and miss work, isn't ideal but schools/childminders/nurseries are not designed for the purpose of caring for ill children.

Meffy Fri 13-Jan-17 16:52:27

My DS goes to a special school! If he gets poorly he takes a long time to recover .... unfortunately parents do the same there !!! Drives me mad!!!

VioletRoar Fri 13-Jan-17 16:55:23

There's no way kids should be going in after sickness, it's inconsiderate for those they're passing on to.
It's probably to do with the stupid attendance figures ofsted force onto the schools being enforced out of context. I used to work with a head who put the fear of god into kids about attendance, they'd sometimes try and pretend they hadn't vomited to be able to come in and avoid a telling off about attendance.

Hawkmoth Fri 13-Jan-17 16:56:26

My mum sent me every day when I had mumps sad

siblingrevelryagain Fri 13-Jan-17 16:58:27

I work in a special school and my children go to mainstream-it winds me up if my kids are ill because if germs spreading, but it's thankfully only an inconvenience; in my school it can seriously compromise a child's health, and affect the safety of the school when staff are off with bugs caught through children coming in already poorly. In closer questioning you often find the parents knew (or the real annoying phrase is trotted out.."but they wanted to come into school/see their friends". You're the adult, make a decision!)

Slightlyperturbedowlagain Fri 13-Jan-17 16:59:30

YANBU -except that GPs are usually very uninterested in chickenpox unless there is a specific reason e.g. Very unwell with it. The risks of exposing other people in the waiting room who are at extra risk such as any immunocompromised or pregnant patients who haven't already had chickenpox mean you should check with the surgery before taking them in.

KondosSecretJunkRoom Fri 13-Jan-17 16:59:46

I agree with you that poorly children should stay at home. However, between the pressure on some people to work to keep a roof over their head and the pressure on schools to keep attendance high (and the constant reminders to parents to send their children in if there's is any doubt that they actually might manage at school/ the big fan fare afforded to children with 100% attendance) I don't think this situation will change.

Jollyjinglest Fri 13-Jan-17 17:03:06

I blame the school partly. The school that my DC go to gave a leaflet saying if you child has a fever, give them calpol and send them in. My child was admitted to hospital and oh the second day I was reminded that he needed to be in school and I was reminded about the importance of attendance.

A child in my DS class felt nauseous and was given a bucket to be sick in. Was only sent home when he was spectacularly sick all over the classroom floor

whattheactualflump Fri 13-Jan-17 17:03:08

Absolutely, winds me up. It also says a lot about the parent/s that they are really fucking stupid and entitled and couldn't give a shit about anyone else

Jollyjinglest Fri 13-Jan-17 17:04:07

The risks of exposing other people in the waiting room who are at extra risk such as any immunocompromised or pregnant patients who haven't already had chickenpox mean you should check with the surgery before taking them in

I told the surgery. They still told me to wait in the waiting room with others

elliejjtiny Fri 13-Jan-17 17:07:39

Yanbu. Although it annoys me that ds3 is always ill, I follow the 48 hour rule and get a moany letter about attendance. If everyone else followed the 48 hour rule then ds3 wouldn't be ill so often I'm sure.

Feel bad at the moment because I got a phone call from school at 11 this morning because ds2 puked everywhere. He was fine this morning and been fine since so hopefully not contagious but of course he'll be staying at home for the weekend now.

GreatFuckability Fri 13-Jan-17 17:08:14

well there are two seperate issues.

sending a vomiting child to school is unreasonable. I have sent mine in after being sick from coughing in the night though, because they did not have a bug.

the chicken pox incident sounds like a genuine mistake, lots of people think you can't get it twice, and if the child isn't unwell in themselves, they might just think its a rash. I certainly wouldn't and didn't take my children to the doctors for chicken pox.

sailorcherries Fri 13-Jan-17 17:09:29

I know not much can be done about chicken pox but both sets of parents genuinely didn't realise it was chicken pox and instead thought "they just had a rash". If my child had a rash like that, one that got worse over the course of a few days, was itchy and so on then I'd definitely be contacting the doctor. Neither of them did.

I care more about my DCs wellbeing and that of his peers than attendance. If he's really unwell he is unwell and schools can get their knickers in a twist if they want.

I only get a half day to arrange cover for a sick child, possibly two days unpaid if I can't and then I'm expected back. I understand the pressures but I still wouldn't send a sick child in.

GreatFuckability Fri 13-Jan-17 17:10:25

The trouble is, there is SO much emphasis on attendance these days, parents can't do right for doing wrong. I also have a great deal of empathy for people who can't afford days off work. if you work a shitty zero hour contract job, taking time off can be the difference between eating or not, having a job or not. i think for most people its a case of desperation rather than being an arsehole.

GovernorMarley Fri 13-Jan-17 17:11:13

YANBU. My kids' schools, however, ABU with the song and dance they make over attendance rewards etc. Ill kids should be at home, not school and should not then be penalised for it.

sailorcherries Fri 13-Jan-17 17:11:51

The parents knew about the rash, seen it develop and spread and never once checked on it. One's sibling even had it last week and nothing!

Obviously vomiting from a cough is different but children who have thrown up all night/more than once due to coughing and are clearly unwell.

Flumplet Fri 13-Jan-17 17:12:11

I completely agree that kiddos should be kept home when sick. I also think that there's a lot of pressure for kids to go in if they want to maintain their 100% attendance record for the promise of reward from the school.

Soubriquet Fri 13-Jan-17 17:13:18

Some parents genuinely don't care. They want to go to work, can't find childcare so shove them in school anyway

Some parents get so worried about absence and school, that they feel they HAVE to send them in, school sends them home and then they don't get in as much trouble

sailorcherries Fri 13-Jan-17 17:13:42

I agree the attendance issue needs to be addressed and ill children shouldn't be made to feel bad/parents shouldn't be reprimanded.

princessmouldilocks Fri 13-Jan-17 17:16:21

Jolly Jingle same as my dc school! Apparently even head lice isn't an appropriate"excuse" have to send them in and clean their hair asap. But alot of parents also use any excuse as to not send their dc in. Not well enough for nursery but can be seen out at the shops most of the day?! Weird though cos the pre nursery had strict rules regarding illness but school is relaxed af nits? Send them in! Fever send them in after a dose of Calpol! Really confusing at as my dc are within a close age of each other so sometimes forget which rules are whose. My dc school send a truancy officer out! I had no credit and had no way of getting out and had a knock on the door! Felt really really bad blush

KondosSecretJunkRoom Fri 13-Jan-17 17:20:08

I care more about my DCs wellbeing and that of his peers than attendance.

Yes. So do I. I had to keep my ashmatic son home when he had colds because he couldn't recognise his own wheeze (like a lobster in hot water) and I couldnt rely on a busy teacher recognise respiratory distress so I would we on the side of caution under we were able to get his asthma stable.

Now, I am pretty hard nosed and we have had a death in the family due to asthma, I wasn't going to be browbeaten by snotty letters but, fuck me, have you seen those letters? The ones that ask if you give a shit about your child and their education, that detail the horrors in store for the child who drops below 95% attendance, that threatens you with a drop in session from the educational attendance officer.

I think if you think as strongly as you do you should see what your own school does and consider if it is proportional.

KondosSecretJunkRoom Fri 13-Jan-17 17:21:15

Lots of mistakes there..Sorry...Doing too many things at once

purplefizz26 Fri 13-Jan-17 17:22:15


Parents who do this are selfish arse holes.

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