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Emergency Blue Peter sanitary solutions requested! (TMI obviously)

(85 Posts)
Morphene Fri 13-Jan-17 12:50:32

I just felt myself flooding, grabbed a tampon, shoved it in my pocket and shuffled down to the loo.

Having gotten the first part of the exchange done, I have pulled the tampon out of my pocket only to discover it is an Goodies Banana and Date Fruit bar. (other brands available).

I am a heavy bleeder and a long long way from my office.....

Any suggestions?

Manumission Fri 13-Jan-17 12:52:08

Big wad of loo paper?

Anything else promising in your pockets or bag?

longdiling Fri 13-Jan-17 12:52:28

Shove a load of loo roll in your knickers. Text a friendly colleague to bring one down to you?

EggysMom Fri 13-Jan-17 12:52:53

Anybody in the office you can text to help?

RuggerHug Fri 13-Jan-17 12:53:13

Bog roll. Plug yourself until you can get sorted properly. Not pleasant or comfy but works.

littleme2016 Fri 13-Jan-17 12:53:16

Second the loo paper.

Can you quickly nip out to the shop?

Friendinneed2016 Fri 13-Jan-17 12:53:43

Toilet paper!

FlopIsMyParentingGuru Fri 13-Jan-17 12:53:56

Big wad of toilet paper as much as possible. Uncomfortable walking is better than flooding, just feign a sprained ankle if needs be.

emmyhNL Fri 13-Jan-17 12:55:06

Any cotton wool lying around? Normally in works bathrooms there'll be a cleaning cupboard close by that might have some stocks or leftovers. Our one at work used to have a cupboard of emergency supplies that you could take if needed under the sink.

(I've done the exact same thing with that exact same brand!).

notsurehowtodothis Fri 13-Jan-17 12:55:14

Sit on the loo for a few minutes. Then, clean up, and take as much loo roll as you can and scrunch it into a temporary sanitary towel and just swamp your underwear with it. Hopefully you are wearing massive pants and not a cheese-grater-esque thong.....

Wash hands, leave, and make a beeline for your bag as quick as you can .....but without running. Stop to talk to no one. Get what you need and get back to the loo and tampon-up.

Morphene Fri 13-Jan-17 12:55:23

okay I have, that shitty shiny bog roll, brown paper towels, a bog brush, water.

In my pockets I have a new plastic 5 pound note, about 3 quid in small change.

oh and an empty painkiller tray bit, you know the thing you pop the pills out of with a layer of foil (now patchy).

HateSummer Fri 13-Jan-17 12:55:45

Bog roll and walk back to the office. Can't believe people get time to start a thread about things like this, right in the moment! Our Brain is amazing at solving problems if you use it.

Morphene Fri 13-Jan-17 12:56:56

all male office...so I am sure they would like to help (and talk about it for years to come), but I'm not so keen.

I am worried about plugging with the brown hand towels...but it really looks like the only option.

I don't need to shop, just get back to my office and select more wisely from the collection of orange items in my bag.

HateSummer Fri 13-Jan-17 12:56:58

You've got time to list the things in your pocket? 🤔🙄

Morphene Fri 13-Jan-17 12:58:07

We had to be more resourceful when we didn't have smart phones in our pockets....

Oh! I have a smart phone. You can add that to the Macgyver list.

Manumission Fri 13-Jan-17 12:58:08

Discard the painkiller tray first I think wink

liz70 Fri 13-Jan-17 12:58:56

I misread this and thought it was some pervy troll thread about shoving foodstuffs up ones fanj. confused blush I was waiting for MNHQ to deal with it.

Do you wear socks? Can you fold them up and stuff them in your knicks? Better than nothing, maybe?

notsurehowtodothis Fri 13-Jan-17 12:58:58

The brown towels should actually work well, but loo paper first!

MrsJayy Fri 13-Jan-17 12:59:23

I would use paper towels put some toilet paper in the middle of paper towel fold it over . And then go out and buy tampons or ask any other woman if they have any spares.

uglyswan Fri 13-Jan-17 12:59:54

Are you wearing socks? If they're cotton, take one off and wrap it in toilet paper.

Morphene Fri 13-Jan-17 13:00:01

All I have is time.....actually I do have a meeting at 1pm so I its going to have to be brown paper up the fanjo isn't it?

the bog roll honestly isn't absorbant, so best of a bad bunch and all.

Onwards and upwards!

Morphene Fri 13-Jan-17 13:00:57

liz that's inspired! and just in the nick of time.

Thank you all!

HateSummer Fri 13-Jan-17 13:01:09

Well you actually can still be resourceful. Put the phone away and stuff some bog roll down your pants and walk back and retrieve your tampon and then return to the toilets and do what you need to do. This can't be the first time It's happened in your life. How old are you?

uglyswan Fri 13-Jan-17 13:01:24

xpost with liz Blue Peter badge for liz.

Manumission Fri 13-Jan-17 13:01:53

You've got as long as it takes for the mooncup evangelicals to show up. That's all. Brown paper sounds crunchy.

What kind of works loo doesn't have sanitary supplies anyway? Time to moan to someone.

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