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To think this woman is on a different planet

(39 Posts)
Easygo Tue 10-Jan-17 09:43:14

Ok...so I met this woman when our children were babies at a mother and baby class, our children are both now 3. Over the last couple of years there have been a number of things that have happened where I really have wondered what planet she is on. For example: her child just turned 3 took his bike and travelled a mile, over a train crossing to the supermarket, was picked up by the police and she thinks this is intelligent?! "isn't x so wonderful, you clever boy getting yourself all the way to the supermarket!" Then theres the time I arrived at the house and she was laughing because her child had painted himself from head to foot in paint, rather than use the paper! So now you have a little background here's what has really wound me up, both our kids have started nursery, mine the local play nursery and she has used her vouchers for a private pre prep. I asked her what she was going to do after nursery when they would need to pay if he stayed and she said, not worried he will get a scholarship. Is it really that easy? She then proceeded to put people like me down whom don't aspire for better education for their children and called it lazy to send to the regular nursery without searching for more. I really want to tell her to get lost and look at her own parenting. Even worse this woman is the school nurse advising other parents when they need support! She discusses who's on the child protection list and refuses to send her child when at senior school to the local school because of all the child protected children. For the record her child is really very rude, turns his head, dose the speak when spoken to, hits her when he doesn't get his own way. Sorry for the rant but whilst we all parent our own way this woman is now stating to push my buttons!!!

user1483981877 Tue 10-Jan-17 09:45:24

Sounds like you need to steer away from her as you clearly don't like her.

d270r0 Tue 10-Jan-17 09:46:28

If you don't like her just stop being friends!

Strongmummy Tue 10-Jan-17 09:46:33

Ignore her? Not sure why she needs to be involved in your life. If she discusses with you who's on the child protection list, report her and move on

Stopmithering Tue 10-Jan-17 09:48:41

The thing that stands out for me is her discussing who is on the child protection list. Think the school ought to know she is doing this. Very very poor form.
The rest? She doesn't sound like my type of gal. If she's not yours, distance yourself.

hungryhippo90 Tue 10-Jan-17 09:51:22

You are the lazy one? There's two situations you've listed where she hasn't been watching her child.

WorraLiberty Tue 10-Jan-17 09:51:58

I agree with Strongmummy

Stop involving her in your life and your conversations, and obviously report her if you haven't already.

PerspicaciaTick Tue 10-Jan-17 09:52:50

Spend less time with her.

However, if she is actually publicly discussing children's confidential safeguarding information which she has access to because of her job, you need to tell her employer.

myfavouritecolourispurple Tue 10-Jan-17 09:55:47

Definitely report her for her indiscretions with the child protection list.

And no, it's not that easy to get a scholarship. My DS has a friend who's really bright and has tried twice - once to get into prep school and then at 11+ entry and missed out both times.

AllPowerfulLizardPerson Tue 10-Jan-17 09:55:48

Well, don'tt count your scholarships before they're hatched.

Very few in pre-preps at all, and likely only to be worth a tiny amount. (you could be cheeky and check on the school's website what awards they make).

I think what she says bears very little resemblance to what is happening in RL. It will trip her up badly one day.

Only you can decide if she's entertaining enough to keep in your life.

Once DC are in nursery/school, it's not too difficult to let an outgrown friendship wither.

Potnoodlewilld0 Tue 10-Jan-17 09:58:34

Report her for her data protection breech. She is really out of order.

liz70 Tue 10-Jan-17 09:59:05

Shades of Viz' "Modern Parents", by the sound of it. Agree with others that it's best if you let this "friendship" slide. You don't seem to like each other very much at all.

Easygo Tue 10-Jan-17 10:01:48

She doesn't mention children by name but for example says " Down that road there's two on the list" or she told me that my brothers girlfriend in her late 20s was on the child protection when she was young. Something that had never been discussed by the girlfriend.

ghostspirit Tue 10-Jan-17 10:02:50

Busy yourself. Do your own thing maybe make friends with other mums at the nursery your child gos to. If the police bought the 3 year old back I should have thought they would report to social services.

pipsqueak25 Tue 10-Jan-17 10:03:33

if she's breached data then report her, you seem very invested in her life but i for one can't figure out why. drop contact it isn't difficult just ignore, block, blank her, life is too short for this shit let alone wasting time complaining about it.

Potnoodlewilld0 Tue 10-Jan-17 10:04:24

Easy it's still identifiable. You need to report her. She could essentially put some one in danger

ghostspirit Tue 10-Jan-17 10:07:54

I think your friend is a bit of a bullshitter. Why on earth would she know about a woman in her 20s being on the protection register when she was a kid.

ems137 Tue 10-Jan-17 10:16:58

I'm sure her child will now be "known" to social services after being brought home by the police!! How did she not notice him gone?

Mari50 Tue 10-Jan-17 10:18:41

Not sure if she's on another planet but you clearly don't like her which begs the question, why do you spend time with her?

PowerPantsRule Tue 10-Jan-17 10:25:55

There is NO WAY she will get a scholarship for her child at the age of four or five. Every year there is a mass exodus from private school nurseries before Reception starts as the vouchers run out. There is no school that would look at a Reception age child and think he/she deserves a scholarship as it is simply too early to tell.

So she is deluded. She sounds like a friend you don't need in your life...

MrsDustyBusty Tue 10-Jan-17 10:27:18

Why is is so outrageous for her child to paint himself? I mean, clearly you dislike her but it's hard to see why this is a crime worthy of mention.

Miserylovescompany2 Tue 10-Jan-17 10:29:11

She shouldn't be discussing confidential details. If reported or found out she'd be in serious trouble. It is NOT very professional either. Why was she looking through other people's records. How were they relevant to her? Then to use the details as gossip, says it all really.

I'd be distancing myself from her...

RedStripeIassie Tue 10-Jan-17 10:31:31

She sounds batshit, rude and unprofessional. Do you need her in your life?

IWantATardis Tue 10-Jan-17 10:34:33

I'd distance myself, you don't sound like you like her very much.

Discussing who's on the child protection list is a pretty major breach of data protection, even if it's "down that road there's two on the list" rather than naming names (although she has named names as far as your brothers girlfriend is concerned). She could get into serious trouble for that.

And as for 4 yr olds getting scholarships - I'm no expert, but I'm very sceptical about that. Older children getting scholarships is one thing - children old enough to pass exams and to demonstrate excellence in whatever the scholarship is being awarded for (e.g. academic or musical ability) - but 4 yr olds? I'd be surprised if there's much chance of a scholarship anywhere for a 4 yr old.

MaQueen Tue 10-Jan-17 10:35:43

Sounds like she's one of those parents...essentially very lazy, ineffectual parenting (masquerading as 'encouraging independence and building character') resulting in an unpleasant, precocious brat of a child that no adult can warm to.

Well done, her...

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