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To feel my sil has insulted my child

(203 Posts)
BlueParrott Sun 08-Jan-17 10:30:00

Grrrrrr. I'm so angry. Last night we went to my future pil to celebrate our engagement. My son came along too. My fiancée was playing with my son and my son was trying to say dada. My future sil was there and she said my son shouldn't call her brother dad as he's obviously not his dad and he'll be confused when he grows up. For reference my son is mixed race and my fiancée is white so yes it is obvious he's not his dad but why say it?

My fiancée told her to shut up and his parents looked shocked. Anyway the night went on and all was fine. Aibu to feel she's insulted my child?

Lilaclily Sun 08-Jan-17 10:31:34


I'd say she's insulted everyone

JennyOnAPlate Sun 08-Jan-17 10:31:41

I'm assuming your son is too young to have understood what she said? In which case, no she hasn't insulted your child.

MrsChrisPratt Sun 08-Jan-17 10:31:58

I'm not really sure how she's insulted your child, but she was rude.

WheresTheEvidence Sun 08-Jan-17 10:33:37

You have a young baby who is at the babbling stage and you're engaged to another man already.

Bluntness100 Sun 08-Jan-17 10:33:49

I don't think she was insulting your child no. However she was being very very rude and judgemental, it's nothing to do with her and you and your partners decision on whether he calls him dad or not.

NavyandWhite Sun 08-Jan-17 10:34:37

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Justme3 Sun 08-Jan-17 10:35:02

Yabu because it's one comment and life's too short to make big deals of little things.

CherryChasingDotMuncher Sun 08-Jan-17 10:35:26

I don't think she was insulting your child at all. Is your son's biological dad still in the picture?

Floggingmolly Sun 08-Jan-17 10:35:36

How old is your child? Is he really just a baby??

BratFarrarsPony Sun 08-Jan-17 10:35:43

goodness that was fast work.

sonyaya Sun 08-Jan-17 10:36:17


So what?

formerbabe Sun 08-Jan-17 10:36:17

You have a young baby who is at the babbling stage and you're engaged to another man already

You sound easily shocked!

No op, I don't think she insulted your DS. She was rude though and it's none of her business.

DeathStare Sun 08-Jan-17 10:36:35

She didn't insult your child but her comment was rude and none of her business.

Lots of people have parents who aren't genetically related to them.

ifcatscouldtalk Sun 08-Jan-17 10:36:36

It's nothing to do with her what your son calls your fiancee. She should've kept her mouth shut. Carry on as you were and congratulations on your engagement.

UsedToBeAPaxmanFan Sun 08-Jan-17 10:36:59

Does your son have contact with his birth father? In which case could that be what your fiance sister is referring to? Because if your son has a "daddy" already, presumably he won't be calling your fiancee "daddy"?

However, that said it's none of her business ess

Afreshstartplease Sun 08-Jan-17 10:37:15

She was rude

However , can you not try and teach your DC your partners name instead of dada

Celaena Sun 08-Jan-17 10:37:53

You have a young baby who is at the babbling stage and you're engaged to another man already.

this really? how old is your child?

maybe your future SIL was annoyed at the speed that you are engaged to her Dbro?

DearMrDilkington Sun 08-Jan-17 10:38:27

I agree with her, but that may be because I've known people letting their young children call every new boyfriend dad and it's all gone tits up when the relationship broke down or the child found out for themselves later on. It's easier to be clear with the child from the start.

SavoyCabbage Sun 08-Jan-17 10:38:38

Well I would say it's up to you, the child's father and your fiancé what your son calls people, not the wider family.

It might not have anything to do with him being mixed race though. That's a bit of a leap unless there is anything else that she's said to make you think otherwise.

NavyandWhite Sun 08-Jan-17 10:38:51

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Only1scoop Sun 08-Jan-17 10:39:32

I don't think she was insulting to him, he wouldn't have a clue probably. Her view was expressed very bluntly.
Not her business.

Floggingmolly Sun 08-Jan-17 10:39:35

It's not easily shocked to think this is unusual.

DailyFail1 Sun 08-Jan-17 10:39:56

She has a point. If your son has a biological dad in the picture calling another man dada at that age will be confusing. Just how if a stepmum is in the picture calling her mum at that age would piss a lot of mums off

ProfessorPickles Sun 08-Jan-17 10:40:04

It was rude of her, I don't think it's any of her business

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