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To Hate people who constantly faff.

(221 Posts)
1980sChick Sat 07-Jan-17 17:49:41

I hate being in the presence of them, sadly my dp is 1.

I was upstairs cleaning the bedroom and changing beds when he popped up to inform me that he and ds were getting hungry and what did I have in mind for tea... because that's obviously my domain. I said if he went and cut the chicken up with a bit of veg we could have pasta bake.

That was 5 o clock, it's been 45 minutes. I expected the pasta bake to be in the oven by now but no, instead I'm greeted with dp who has nearly every bowl we own out in front of him ( when he cooks it's like he's doing his own cooking segment on tv with all the bits in the bowls). He has taken to sharpening the knives instead of using them and is now finding the perfect song for his cooking experience andwhen I comment that he's taking too long, I'm the unreasonable 1.

It's like this with everything, this morning his mum called round and we had no tea bags, he said he'd pop out to get some, he disappeared upstairs for a shower 1st then ironed a outfit, spent 10 mins on his hair then appeared downstairs to ask which brand to get, his mum had left 30 mins before he came down.

How on earth do you live with people who faff, there's no sense of urgency at all with him and it drives me mad!

DandelionAndBedrock Sat 07-Jan-17 17:52:12

My DP does this. I let him get ready first (dressed, teeth brushed, shoes on - like a child about to go to school) then I sort myself out. I tend to faff a little, but the faffing never coincides.

I do all the ironing because I get so frustrated watching him pootle back and forth getting himself all set up.

SavoyCabbage Sat 07-Jan-17 17:52:49

I think we are married to the same man.

MrsTerryPratchett Sat 07-Jan-17 17:55:13

FIL can take a whole day to cash a cheque. I kid you not. And tells his grown children that their lives are 'too busy'. No shit Sherlock what with having to work, raise children and not having a day for cheque cashing.

Gardencentregroupie Sat 07-Jan-17 17:56:28

I can shower, wash and blow dry my hair, dress, clean my teeth, clean DD's teeth, change her nappy and dress her in the time it takes DH to get showered and dressed not counting jeans ffs. Then we go downstairs and I put on my shoes, DD's shoes, check the nappy bag and pack her water bottle, toy and snack if required while DH puts his shoes on yet he thinks I'm the faffer because he then has to wait 30 seconds while I have a wee before we go hmm

1980sChick Sat 07-Jan-17 17:56:33

Oh god the ironing... 😫😫 I can't be in the same room as him doing it anymore. If I go first he will then re iron mine and ds's clothes. And no matter what he irons he will ensure that every last drop of water is gone from that iron. Could be a pair of undies to a double duvet cover his goal in life is to make that iron empty.

And will the bastard refill it... no he will not. If I ever got done for murder it would be over his use of never refilling the iron for the next time I have to use it.

dollydaydream114 Sat 07-Jan-17 17:56:46

People who can't just get on with things when they are clearly urgent drive me round the bend. I used to have a colleague who regularly attended an external meeting with me and every time we needed to leave to get to this meeting, would:

- send an email that could have waited
- pack numerous items into his bag at the pace of a snail, only two of which (notepad and pen) he needed
- take his mug to the kitchen, wash it and put it away even though we'd only be gone an hour or two
- "just make a quick phone call" that would go on for ages
- stop to chat to someone about something non-urgent on the way out
- suddenly decide he needed to visit the gents on the way out

We were late for this meeting every month for a year, and not once was our lateness a) necessary or b) my fault. angry

1980sChick Sat 07-Jan-17 17:58:21

Oh the magic words...were late we've got 5 mins suddenly loosens his bowels and we have to wait in the car while he sits on the throne watching epic fails having the shit of his life in peace!

PurpleMinionMummy Sat 07-Jan-17 17:59:40

Ermm I think I'm married to the same man too! I continually pointed out over Christmas how I can wrap 50 million presents in the same space of time he can wrap 5. It's the same with everything, cleaning, cooking, washing up, any job ever. WHAT THE FUCK TAKES SO LONG??!! I seriously don't get it confused

MadHattersWineParty Sat 07-Jan-17 18:02:21

I once broke up with a boyfriend who was late to meet me outside the theatre because he was 'making a playlist' for the 'journey'. Twenty-five fucking minutes on the tube. We missed the start of the play because I'd stupidly let him order the tickets so I couldn't go in without him, and when he got there he was eating a bloody sandwich from Pret because he hadn't had time to get anything to eat so had gone there first!!

My heart used to sink when he said he'd make breakfast for me, even toast and coffee took about half an hour.

Fafffers drive me insane. DP has a mild case but I can usually speed him up with a 'look'.

I sympathise.

Snifftest Sat 07-Jan-17 18:07:09

Is your husband my husband?

Blinkybell Sat 07-Jan-17 18:09:36

DH faffs.

Drives me mad but I just ignore him now.

He always has to have a poo just before we leave the house, so I just sit on the sofa and play on my phone until he's finished. I'm not sitting in the car waiting for him

He faffs about cooking, cleaning, just about any house hold chore - it's his useless man act employed to get me to help him/do it for him - I ignore it and he seemingly manages to get his finger out when he realises he's on his own

Idrinkandiknowstuff Sat 07-Jan-17 18:17:00

Oh god, this is my DH. Faffs for England. We're due to go out in about half an hour tonight, I'm ready, he is still in his onesie and has decided now is the perfect time to sort through the huge pile of paperwork I've been asking him to deal with for weeks.

tierny Sat 07-Jan-17 18:34:14

I once had a boss like this - she could waste a whole day faffing. Literally. God knows what she did all day but she would just wander around all day and no matter how many times I asked her if she had called back a customer ?, or had she placed the order yet ? She would say not yet I've been so busy !
She was a prime example of 'busy doing nothing'
And she was always at least an hour late to leave for a meeting or appointment. Everyone was sick of her in the end.

daddyorscience Sat 07-Jan-17 18:34:19

Hell no. I can't be doing with it at all. Really irritates the hell out of me.. Very much so.

user1471453601 Sat 07-Jan-17 18:43:45

Before I retired, my boss and my bosses boss became so intimidated with my irritation at their latnes

fourquenelles Sat 07-Jan-17 18:47:14

Cannot abide faffers. I worked with a few who wouldn't run to the tap if their knickers were on fire. So frustrating JUST BLOODY GET ON WITH IT!! <and breath>.

user1471453601 Sat 07-Jan-17 18:49:54

As I was saying, before I rudely interrupted myself, that they both became quite punctual.

Not proud of how I did it. Lots of passive aggressive behaviour. Heavy sighting. Eye roles and even, when they were being totally outrageous (half an hour late for a meeting with no reason given as to why), leaving the meeting area and going back to mY office.

To me, faffing smacks of "my time is so much more important than yours"

Christmasnoooooooooooo Sat 07-Jan-17 18:50:18

My ex was one . He had to shower and wash his balding hair before taking me to hospital so could give birth we just made it.

TheCatsMother99 Sat 07-Jan-17 18:53:41

One of my best friends is a faffer. Thank god I love her otherwise I couldn't deal with her.

I genuinely don't know how she gets through life because she faffs so much or is so disorganised.

Fairenuff Sat 07-Jan-17 18:57:17

Nope. Couldn't be with someone like that.

SIL is and she is constantly complaining about him.


ScarletForYa Sat 07-Jan-17 18:57:27

I don't deal with faffers. I just leave them to it and go on without them. Can't stand it.

thatwouldbeanecumenicalmatter Sat 07-Jan-17 19:01:23

Put him in the pasta bake - at least he'll be useful then grin

I feel your pain but thankfully it's just my parents and Dsis and BIL that are like this and thankfully I don't have to live with them. I keep contact to a minimum for the benefit of my cortisol levels.

austenozzy Sat 07-Jan-17 19:01:44

For some reason, my mum can't just get out of the car when we arrive somewhere. She has to get her bag onto her lap and piss about for several minutes first. She is a bit of a general faffer, but why can't do whatever she does a few minutes before we get there?

Ekefox Sat 07-Jan-17 19:08:50

I'm with the king of faffers. Me-in the throes of labour, literally in transition on all fours on the bed
Him - sorting out his wardrobe because 'there's not enough space' emptying the contents on to said bed.

I emptied the contents of my body onto it bar the baby and then he finally realised that we should leave for the hospital.

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