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Bloody mobile phones in primary schools.

(118 Posts)
Aworldofmyown Fri 06-Jan-17 13:07:26

I'm sure this has been done to death but you only register something when it affects you!

First week back at school and x,y and z of DS friends got mobiles phones for Christmas - they are in year 3! He knows he can't have one and knows i'm unlikely to change my mind as his elder sister doesn't have on in Y6.

I'm pissed off because other parents keep implying that I am unreasonable by not letting them have phones - apparently I'm just delaying the inevitable. Our school has had real issues with inappropriate mobile phone use (think nasty texts, bullying etc) and whilst I can protect them from that I will.

Although I'm starting to wonder if I am being unreasonable hmm

early30smum Fri 06-Jan-17 13:08:37

Year 3?! My DD is year 3 and no way is she getting a phone yet. YANBU.

JustDanceAddict Fri 06-Jan-17 13:10:07

Year 6 is the time to get them. DS was one of the last of his friends to get a phone. Novelty of social media 24/7 wore off pretty quickly - he mainly uses it for game playing and whatsapp.

MaryManchego Fri 06-Jan-17 13:11:35

My year 5 feels very hard done by that she doesn't have a phone. Apparently everyone else has got one.

She still doesn't need one and isn't getting one.

WorraLiberty Fri 06-Jan-17 13:14:06

Does your DD in year 6 take a phone with her when she goes to the park/plays out with friends?

I think you are delaying the inevitable but there's nothing wrong with that.

I wouldn't get so het up over what other parents think really. It's too exhausting.

Aworldofmyown Fri 06-Jan-17 13:14:14

I've told my eldest she can have one for secondary school, probably at the end of her last term in primary.

DJBaggySmalls Fri 06-Jan-17 13:14:19

YANBU. Stick with it.

WorraLiberty Fri 06-Jan-17 13:18:17

These threads normally start off with a parent being annoyed that other parents are judging them for not buying their kid a mobile phone.

And end up with parents judging other parents because they have bought their kid a mobile phone.

Just different parental choices, so all the judging gets a bit silly imo.

itsmine Fri 06-Jan-17 13:21:00

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

paxillin Fri 06-Jan-17 13:21:09

Mine told me lots of kids in year 3 had them. Turned out it was mum's cast off sans SIM card. Taking it to school for showing off purposes only.

Aworldofmyown Fri 06-Jan-17 13:23:08

I just get a little tired of the implication that I am somehow holding them back, to be fair this conversation is occurring more with my older child.

It is inevitable, you are right. However, so are relationships, drinking, sex etc etc and as a parent I will try to delay those until they are age appropriate.

It has been very clear given incidents that have happened with mobiles phones i our school that most 10/11 year old children are not old enough to understand the consequences of their actions. I'm not sure I want my children 'learning from their mistakes' in such a public way. sad'

BToperator Fri 06-Jan-17 13:23:50

YANBU to not buy your DC a phone, but I don't see how the other parents are either if they have chosen to buy phones. My DS got a phone when he was in year 3. It is a cheap PAYG with no internet, which he takes with him when he goes to the park etc. It cost £20, so its not the end of the world if he loses/breaks it, and I consider it good practice in looking after it, for when he gets a bit older, and wants a smartphone.

Aworldofmyown Fri 06-Jan-17 13:25:25

The ones I have spoken to parents about are cast offs, with data only sims.

itsmine Fri 06-Jan-17 13:26:22

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Witchend Fri 06-Jan-17 13:27:35

Mine get them in year 5. They have them at secondary and ime year 6 is the point they get more independent about going out and a mobile is useful for me.

Lots do get them younger-usually it's mum/dad's old one with a payg sim in. Mostly they're interested in them for the games at that age.

PebbleInTheMoonlight Fri 06-Jan-17 13:33:40

My daughter hates that I won't allow her to have a mobile. She's in year 5...to be honest she is in the minority of her classmates but I'm not backing down just because all her friends have iphones (they really do!)

When she does get a mobile it'll be for safety reasons only and it will be as basic as I can find so she can call and text but nothing else.

Aside from the whole social media implications and sensible choices issue there's the risk of someone eyeing up even a second hand device and setting out to steal it through violent or bullying methods.

She can have a bells and whistles phone when she can afford to pay for it herself (and will almost certainly take care of it better that way too).

Not judging others but certainly not letting others judgement bother me.

NotThrowAwayMyShot Fri 06-Jan-17 13:35:39

Year 3 is ridiculous.

Dd has a very simple calls/texts only phone at the end of year 4 but it was for a very specific reason relating to a particular activity she was doing. She was never allowed to take it to school.

BIgBagofJelly Fri 06-Jan-17 13:37:53

The "delaying the inevitable" argument is very odd. It's inevitable that my child will try alcohol at some point but I'm certainly not going to buy him some when he's 10 just because he'll probably eventually try it when he's 16. Same with phones, of course she'll have a phone when she's older it's still totally unnecessary in Y3!

kel12345 Fri 06-Jan-17 13:38:48

I probably shouldn't comment as I not have a 16 month old, but I can't believe the way mobile phones are so common with such young children now. I didn't get my first phone until I was in my final year at primary school. I started walking to school by myself, so my mum wanted me to have a phone so I could phone or text her if I needed to. But that was in 2003 I got my first one. They did a hell of a lot less in them days.
I think maybe it's more what phones can do these days that's the bigger problem.
Not judging anyone at all. Just my opinion on it. But I don't think I'd want my child to have one that young.

GoldenBlue Fri 06-Jan-17 13:42:13

We live in a remote area. My kids had phones (cast off with cheap sim) as soon as they were allowed to play out unsupervised. I felt the benefits of tracking were positive.
We did the 'with great power comes great responsibility' speech and all have been very responsible.
Phones were the norm by year 6 at the latest in prep for the longer journeys to school and greater independence.
I do worry about cyber bullying etc. But the kids are very tech savvy and sensible.
But it is your choice and you decide when your kids get phones.
By secondary school there will be an expectation that the child will have access to a PC with internet access as schools rely on this for home work

JacquesHammer Fri 06-Jan-17 13:43:22

Meh. Mine has had a mobile since she was 7 (a cast off iPhone 3 and now a cast of iPhone 5).

I parent mine, you parent yours. I don't judge. We're all happy

Cagliostro Fri 06-Jan-17 13:44:00

YANBU

HandsomeDevil Fri 06-Jan-17 13:46:48

are you sure?
apparently "half" of Y5 DC1's friends have got their own mobile phones. When I ask if she's actually seen one of these phones with her own eyes it's quite a different story.

DailyFail1 Fri 06-Jan-17 13:47:16

I gave my brother his first phone at 10 because he used to be at football club til very late, and needed to call me if his lift bailed out. It was a basic Nokia so calls and texts only. Plenty of my friends nowadays give their similarly aged kids an old iphone with data/social media restricted. Not sure what the problem is?

nocampinghere Fri 06-Jan-17 13:49:09

stop caring about what others think, or what others do.

in reality, if your 8 year old wants an ipod and you have an old iphone sitting there, what are you going to do? give them the iphone ! That's the reality of the situation, i doubt there are any popping into carphonewarehouse and getting their 8 year old a new phone on a contract.

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