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To allow ds aged 10 and dd aged 7 share a bed.

(320 Posts)
EveOnline2016 Tue 03-Jan-17 16:44:33

They have both got their own rooms but prefer to share a bed every night.

Ds has a double bed and there is enough room for both of them.

My mum says it's illegal, but surely that's not right.

Crowdblundering Tue 03-Jan-17 16:45:23

It's not illegal.

cherrycrumblecustard Tue 03-Jan-17 16:46:11

It's not illegal!

I wouldn't feel comfortable with it though although I struggle to articulate why. And I am sure lots of people will be along to say their 17 year old and 19 year old opposite sex siblings share a bed.

GeillisTheWitch Tue 03-Jan-17 16:46:37

If they're happy to do it I'd let them get on with it. Drum into both of them that if either wants it to end that they both comply, no argument. DS will be reaching puberty soon and I doubt if he will want his sister in his bed then.

Allthewaves Tue 03-Jan-17 16:46:59

Tbh I wouldn't want them sharing a bed. Puberty can hit at 11. My eldest ds is 8 and he's already doesn't like me seeing him naked - we are quite liberal household with nudity.

Yoarchie Tue 03-Jan-17 16:47:14

It's not illegal but just be a bit cautious.

My 10yo ds and 8yo dd would sleep happily together in a double bed though. Neither are properly into puberty though.

DisappointingBanana Tue 03-Jan-17 16:47:17

Its not illegal. Its two children playing, and young siblings being close. Nothing wrong with it at all.

Figure17a Tue 03-Jan-17 16:48:10

Not illegal but on the cusp of the age it's inappropriate imo

MrsKCastle Tue 03-Jan-17 16:48:26

Not illegal, but at that age I think I would encourage them to stick to their own beds.

AmeliaJack Tue 03-Jan-17 16:49:42

Of course it's not illegal. confused

My boy/girl twins have their own rooms at home but if we are on holiday, staying in a hotel or visiting friends/family they often share a double bed.

SumThucker Tue 03-Jan-17 16:49:54

I wouldn't allow them to.

EveOnline2016 Tue 03-Jan-17 16:50:12

They can go to their own beds or choose not to share, but they just like sharing.

Strongmummy Tue 03-Jan-17 16:52:22

For all those saying they wouldn't allow it, how would you articulate that to your children? I'm genuinely interested, not being sneery.

Believeitornot Tue 03-Jan-17 16:52:32

Have you spoken to them separately about it?

ScarlettDarling Tue 03-Jan-17 16:53:00

Of course it's not illegal. My dc (12 and 9, opposite sexes,) have often shared on holiday. I think this may not last much longer but at the minute, neither of them have a problem with it. They wouldn't dream of sharing at home though.

DaftJelly Tue 03-Jan-17 16:53:25

My 12yo DD and 5yo DS often share a bed, either that or he's in with us. He doesn't like sleeping alone.

RedHelenB Tue 03-Jan-17 16:53:33

Its fine my 3 like to sleep in the same room sometimes and they are older than that! Maybe more of an issue if they didn't have a choice and one wanted privacy.

cherrycrumblecustard Tue 03-Jan-17 16:55:11

Strong, I'd just say 'no' to be honest!

I think it's totally different on holiday or if relatives are visiting and you want them to have children's rooms/beds, to an ongoing situation with reasonable alternatives.

harderandharder2breathe Tue 03-Jan-17 16:55:23

Agree with emphasising that it stops as soon as one of them wants it to, but if they're both happy then it's fine. Certainly not illegal

EveOnline2016 Tue 03-Jan-17 16:57:14

I would assume one ds or dd hits puberty then they themselves will choose not to share.

Ds doesn't like anyone in the bathroom when he is bathing, which is respected and dd knows not to go in there when he is naked same as getting changed.

TitaniasCloset Tue 03-Jan-17 16:58:59

Would bunk beds work?

dowhatnow Tue 03-Jan-17 16:59:50

I'd leave it to them but make it clear that it stops as soon as one feels uncomfortable.

CaraAspen Tue 03-Jan-17 17:00:03

No locks?

dollydaydream114 Tue 03-Jan-17 17:00:16

It's certainly not illegal, and it's nice that they get on well enough to share a bed without killing each other! My brother and I could barely sit next to each other at the dinner table without an argument.

I would probably be encouraging them to stop, though - not because I think there's anything creepy or wrong about it, but just because in a year or two, DS is going to want more privacy for obvious reasons and DD will need to get used to sleeping on her own. I'd have thought it might be just easier for her and less embarrassing for DS if they're weaned off it now rather than when he starts to approach puberty and inevitably doesn't want his sister in bed with him any more.

Have they said why they prefer to share? Is one of them scared to sleep alone for any reason? I don't think there's anything wrong with it, but I don't know many 10-year-old boys who would choose to share their bed with their little sister, so I just wondered if perhaps one of them might be scared of the dark or something and hasn't told you.

CaraAspen Tue 03-Jan-17 17:00:26

On bathroom doors, I mean?

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