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AIBU?

That people should not ask questions ...

5 replies

RebelRogue · 03/01/2017 12:54

If they actually can't handle an honest answer and all they want is lies?
I see it all the time,from baby names to gifts to relationship stuff.
They ask a (normally closed ended question - yes/no type) and then they get angry and hurt and whatever because the answer was not what they wanted. Even if it's true and honest.
Even more annoying is the demand for politeness,when they actually want a pretty lie.
What's the fucking point?

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Footinmouthasusual · 03/01/2017 12:57

Because no one generally asks you to disagree with them they want you to support their choices.

Like if someone asked you 'how's you' they actually don't want to hear a long story of woe just 'fine how's you' and you say back 'fine'.

Unless it's really serious don't disagree. Simple.

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roundtable · 03/01/2017 12:57

It can be in the delivery imo.

However, there are those who don't want a truthful answer and are looking for confrontation/upset. I change the subject with those ones.

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RebelRogue · 03/01/2017 13:03

Foot but some people focus on involuntary reactions as well. So your mouth might lie,sorry be polite,but your face gives it away and that's rude too apparently. Dunno, I just don't see the point in all the angst and hurt feelings. You ask for an opinion,you are going to get one.

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5foot5 · 03/01/2017 13:33

I think it depends a bit on context and whether any harm would come from a little white lie if you think the other person would be hurt.

For example, friend has bought a new dress and is clearly thrilled with it but you you think it doesn't flatter her. It might be kinder to make enthusiastic noises than be brutally honest and spoil her enjoyment of it.

OTOH if she is asking your opinion on her new DP and you have good reason to think he is a bit of a shit or would be bad news for here then honesty would be the best policy.

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ViewBasket · 03/01/2017 14:23

One of the great things about MN is you can find out what people really think about the dress/name/school/city/friendship/shampoo you are considering. People aren't likely to be as open face-to-face.

If someone asks for opinions on a thread, it can be a conversation-stopper if someone says "I use that shampoo and won't hear a word against it, I'll be offended if anyone says it's terrible"! This means the OP then misses out on hearing people's genuine thoughts.

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