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To ask how you would deal with this?

(14 Posts)
Bibs2014 Sun 01-Jan-17 09:46:45

I'm part of a whatsapp group consisting of my 2 brothers, 2 sisters and a sister in law. Wished them a happy new year at midnight and not one of them has wished it back. They've all read the message.

Backstory is that they will regularly ignore messages from me on the group but are perfectly fine to my face.

When I've tried to back off before I get flamed for not being interested in the family.

But AIBU to wish 5 people happy new year and expect a message back! Everyone else I've wished it to has said it back!

I'm also part of on another whatsapp group containing my wider family is cousins etc and one sister has responded to them all saying happy new year.

I know it sounds petty but it's hurtful.

Euphemia Sun 01-Jan-17 09:49:15

It does sound petty. It's a tiny thing. Do you often get worked up about how quickly people respond to you?

What sort of responses/non-responses on your behalf have caused problems before?

Why do you have this group? What is its purpose?

Gizlotsmum Sun 01-Jan-17 09:49:17

Hmm I saw messages last night but didn't respond till this morning. Maybe see if they return the wishes today?

justanotherusername0 Sun 01-Jan-17 09:49:31

I'm just replying to some happy new year messages now that were sent last night . I read them briefly but I was watching TV with DH and then went to bed (before 12). Now I'm replying when I can focus on writing something meaningful because last night I was having some time with DH

AverageJosephine Sun 01-Jan-17 09:49:50

I find NY tricky with all the bloody messages! I'm sure I've insulted people by just responding to the odd one that happens to land at a moment Im not busy speaking to someone I'm at a party with etc. Or if in bed, I'd glance at the messages that buzzed in and probably not respond.

I'm not sure it means anything at all that nobody responded.

Gizlotsmum Sun 01-Jan-17 09:50:24

Didn't see the bit about the other group maybe she thought that message would cover both groups?

Bibs2014 Sun 01-Jan-17 09:53:39

Ok first few posts saying it's me not them grin. Let's wait and see what happens today.

Turquoisetamborine Sun 01-Jan-17 09:53:49

I'm bored of New Year messages. I haven't replied to all of them. I find new year meaningless, so I don't bother. They are generally just copy and pasted messages sent out en masse anyway.

balence49 Sun 01-Jan-17 10:01:20

I find the generic happy new year messages the same as the generic chain garbage folk forward. Unless it's a actual message to me that requires a response there won't be one.

ArgyMargy Sun 01-Jan-17 10:01:36

Really? I would deal with it by getting a life.

BaileysOClock Sun 01-Jan-17 10:02:05

YABU, I hate New Years messages, I have 4 kids and an up at 5am so am in bed by 10pm latest, every year I ask people not to send messages cos it'll wake us up (have to keep phone on hot DH alarm) and every year our phones start buzzing at 12, ugh. It means nothing...nothing has changed since yesterday. Every message that I had last night I probably looked at, thought "ah for fuck's sake" and tried to go back to sleep, I don't think I replied to one 😂 The worst is the statuses people write and tag you in on fb along with 100 other people and you either get a thousand notifications or remove your tag and then they get offended. Tut.

Bibs2014 Sun 01-Jan-17 10:13:20

Ok thanks everyone, I thought it was common curtesy to say it back, I won't feel guilty if I don't respond to anyone who wishes it to me grin

cardibach Sun 01-Jan-17 10:17:03

I'm with balance - a copy message forwarded to all contacts isn't really something that needs personal response. Yours sounds a little different though, as it's to a small group. I wouldn't necessarily expect a reply until they have got up, got on with things and remembered they rapead it last night, though. Also, if they'd had a few they might not really remember where they saw different messages, so they may not see it until they go to use the group again.

justanotherusername0 Sun 01-Jan-17 10:17:50

Yeah it's polite however I also think it's not polite to stop paying attention to who you're with in person to send messages so I guess it works both ways. smile

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