AIBU to think some doctors are really arrogant?(117 Posts)
I know some are wonderful: I did have a lovely GP once but as a whole does anyone else find them horribly arrogant? Just been in hospital and without fail was spoken to like shit by doctors while the nurses were lovely. Has anyone else found doctors to be so up themselves?
Yes, I had some poor experiences with hospital doctors when my aunt was in hospital earlier this year.
My GP is lovely, but my experience having both my children was that the doctors were ghastly people - cold, rude, dismissive and generally treated me like an idiot and/or a lump of meat - whereas the midwives were wonderful.
I've been in hospital more times than I care to remember and thankfully I've only come across two or three doctors in all that time who were patronising and arrogant. I've mostly found doctors to be much more compassionate than nurses when it comes to pain relief.
As a whole? No, yabu. I think, especially in hospitals, that they are running round trying to see everyone, sort everything. My anaesthetist came to see me at silly o'clock, having just come out of surgery, to check how I was feeling and to check for allergies etc for an early surgery. He could have gone home and checked in the morning, but he thought he'd come and see how I was.
Yabu. They are extremely overworked and as I work with many of them there is only a few who I would consider as being in any way 'arrogant'.
Most are lovely and I don't think you realise their workloads.
Ward manager (nurse) viewpoint......
I'm sorry to hear you've been unwell recently and that you felt poorly treated.
I'm sure the doctors and nurses all worked very hard to care for youbduribg this horrendously busy time of year. Morale amongst doctors is low due to many factors - that plus the stress of the extra workload during this time of year can make some people less polite and chatty than they would like to be.
I really don't like the tone of your OP, it's just unpleasant and does nothing to help the morale issues I mentioned above. If you would like to feedback to the team who looked after you then please contact PALS as I'm sure they'll be able to deal with the situation more constructively than anyone on here.
You've put "some" in your title and now you seem to be talking about doctors generally. Which do you mean? Of course "some" doctors will be arrogant, just like "some" estate agents, checkout staff, bus drivers, teachers, builders, nurses, barristers, barristas etc etc will be arrogant. YABVVU to sweepingly say that doctors are up themselves. I'm sorry you had a bad experience in hospital but doctors often/increasingly don't have time to spend hours with patients telling them how lovely they are.
YABU. 200,000 doctors in the UK and you feel you can call most of them arrogant?
Doctors are people.
Some people are arrogant.
Ergo, some doctors will be arrogant.
YABVU to proclaim that all doctors are arrogant.
I think it's pot luck whether you get a good one or bad one. DM and I are at the same surgery and my GP can't be arsed. I recently came back from a holiday in south America where I'd been bitten senseless by mosquitos, with blisters on my tongue, swollen glands, a red raw throat and sores on my lips. My GP told me I had a viral infection and gave me anti viral Meds without even taking my temperature. DM went to hers with a sore wrist and was sent for an xray the same day!
I've come across both really lovely and incredibly twatish doctors. I don't think there's a higher number of arrogant doctors then in any other profession, but you tend to meet them when emotions are running high and you're more likely to pick up on certain things that would normally pass you by.
The docs that delivered my dd were wonderful. Both came to see me the morning after she was born. Not because they needed to check on me for medical reasons but just because they were nice and wondered how I was.
I think you are generalising and being unfair. They are entitled to think their medical degree and postgrad training provides more knowledge and insight than your googling. They work incredible hours for very mediocre reward. They are treated poorly often with no control over leave, weekends or even where they will be working. People are incredibly rude to them sometimes and they miss breaks because the accident and emergency is full of people with a cough or bellyache they have had for five days.
I'm sorry if you felt I was just having a dig! I wasn't - I just noticed the same arrogant attitude amongst all of them. I had a lovely GP once and the nurses were absolutely lovely so perhaps I was just unlucky!
I think some medical staff are - but i've not noticed it more with Dr's tbh.
The absolute worst I experienced was the sonographer (sp) at ds2's 20 week scan. I don't know if they're Dr/nurse grade or something else entirely?
She shouted at me and gave me a full two minute rant about how superficial I was...after he'd managed to close his mouth, dh had to tell her to stop talking or we'd be leaving and putting in a complaint. This was in response to me asking the sex of the baby, at the end of the appointment when she was clearly just about to pack up and hadn't mentioned it.
Some people are arrogant.
YABU to make sweeping generalisations about an entire profession. There are nice people and unpleasant people in all walks of life.
Most arrogant person I've had the misfortune to work with was a highly regarded surgeon. He threw a scalpel at a scrub nurse as the theatre was too hot for his personal liking.
Also the other surgeon who used to sing happy birthday as he surgically aborted later term foetuses.
Almost all doctors I've encountered (not too many to be fair) have been perfectly fine however when I was having my 3rd baby turned from breech position the doctor was very arrogant and made me, DH and the nurses feel on edge. Apparently he was known for it. Fast forward a number of years and he treated me for another gynae issue. I asked him if he was the doctor that turned dd and he said 'probably as I was the only one any good at it'. He got stuck and I ended up with ecs so he wasn't brilliant in my opinion!
There is something about doctors that dehumanises some of them.
Also the other surgeon who used to sing happy birthday as he surgically aborted later term foetuses. Monstrous behaviour.
Or perhaps an attempt to deal with the emotional impact of performing an incredibly distressing procedure in order to save the life of the mother or prevent her having to carry a nonviable baby to term? Gallows humour is an important coping mechanism and not the same as being arrogant or cruel - provided of course that it is not in front of the patient/family.
For me it was the opposite too, when I had my daughter a couple of the nurses were deeply unpleasant, intolerant and quite frankly rude in a couple of instances and the doctors were all very compassionate and attentive.
Of course there was many good nurses, just a couple of bad apples in the nursing staff, and those bad apples i have to say were hated by the other nurses and by the doctors, who made it obvious, by the disdainful looks on their faces, rolled eyes, or even comments like "I'm so sorry about her". Or "I don't know why she chose to be a nurse" and even "some people shouldn't be nurses, I'm so sorry".
I had one bad doctor who gave me an internal, my sixth in sixth hours and they could not feel my cervix and he hurt me by being rough and tying to reach it. The midwife held my hand as he examined me, which shoild have been a red flag, and when he left she said kindly " you can cry now, everyone does" and I did. He walked back in at that moment and was so genuinely shocked. Asked why I was crying in bemusement and I explained it was because he had hurt me and he apologised looking shocked and I got the impression I was the first woman who had got the chance tell him.😞
I am not adverse to gallows humour but that did make me feel a bit ill.
- no, it was done in a mocking way. It wasn't gallows humour. He would do it categorically every time as routine.
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