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To think dh is being a knob, expecting me to be silent after a night out

(105 Posts)
LardLizard Fri 23-Dec-16 07:54:59

Ds went out last night, was driving so not drinking, got home about one
Got changed in the bathroom and was quite as a mouse got already for bed then slipped in bed

He was already huffing n puffing n sighing at this point

Then I went to text the friend, I was out with just av quick got home safe, as it's about a 45 min drive in the dark alone
Had to do it once iwas in bed, as my phone was out of charge
Otherwise I would have done it once I got on my drive before even getting in the house
Anyway dh had a fit about this saying how out of order I am etc
And basically going mad

Don't go out at night often really
Wasn't pissed
Was as quite as I possible could have been

MiladyThesaurus Fri 23-Dec-16 07:56:52

Can you not just apologise for having woken him up and started pissing about with your phone?

Scooby20 Fri 23-Dec-16 07:57:05

It would have pissed me off tbh.

Wether he was reasonable would depend on what you mean by 'having a fit'. Shouting and swearing is over the top.

QuiltedAloeVera Fri 23-Dec-16 07:57:17

Sounds like an overreaction.

Does he go out?

ScarletOverkill Fri 23-Dec-16 07:59:37

The thing is the light from your phone would have been quite bright in the darkness so I think ywbu to have used your phone in bed. Particularly as you knew you had disturbed him already. You could have been charging your phone in another room while you are getting changed to send the text.

MsJamieFraser Fri 23-Dec-16 08:01:04

He needs to get a grip and I'd be telling him in no uncertain word that he does not speak to me in that manner.

HaveNoSocks Fri 23-Dec-16 08:01:33

I think having a grumble would be perfectly reasonable if he was literally shouting then that's way over the top.

HermioneJeanGranger Fri 23-Dec-16 08:02:49

I'd be pissed off to be woken up, albeit accidentally, only for my OH to carry on messing about and stopping me going back to sleep.

HIBU to huff and puff though - he could have just asked you to be quick/quiet.

Mindtrope Fri 23-Dec-16 08:03:32

This would have pissed me off too.

OP you could have sent the text from another room.

5000candlesinthewind Fri 23-Dec-16 08:03:38

I get really irrational when I've been woken up from my slumber. I can understand his frustration.

Don't think you are totally unreasonable though. I'm sure he'll get over it.

LardLizard Fri 23-Dec-16 08:05:07

Thing is even before I sent a v quick I'm home safe text he was already huffing n puffing and I'd already got changed in the bathroom

I jean it really is impossible to get into bd completely silent

We don't have a spare room
Otherwise I'd go in there after a night out

If I had took my charger out and into another room, that would have also pissed him off

rollonthesummer Fri 23-Dec-16 08:05:42

He's being a knob. Who went out-you or your DS?

kittybiscuits Fri 23-Dec-16 08:06:03

I would wonder if he had some kind of problem with me going out.

LardLizard Fri 23-Dec-16 08:06:36

If he goes out, which to be fair isn't that often he normally wakes me accidentally
But he normally stinks of curry n beer
But I just stuck it up as it's not that often

LardLizard Fri 23-Dec-16 08:07:15

I Went out

LardLizard Fri 23-Dec-16 08:10:10

He seemed fine about me going out but he's weird IMO about sleep

For example we have Togo to bed at the same time
Like if he decides to go to bed at say 113o
He will say come on time for bed

And I have to go to bed because if he goes to bed, then I go up say an hour or so snd wake him, by just slipping into bed he gets pissed off then as he says if he gets woken he can't get back to sleep

So I end up going to bed sometimes before I want to

hawaiibaby Fri 23-Dec-16 08:10:28

HIBU. These things happen when you go out - in fact my dh wakes me accidentally sometimes by just coming to bed after me. I just... go back to sleep confused He sounds like a real misery.

Pseudonym99 Fri 23-Dec-16 08:10:34

It's quiet. Not quite.

BowiesJumper Fri 23-Dec-16 08:10:43

What's your son got to do with it?
Either way, he's overreacting just a tad.

HermioneJeanGranger Fri 23-Dec-16 08:10:48

Has he apologised for getting stroppy?

I think most people are grumpy and irrational when they get woken up in the middle of the night, tbh.

LardLizard Fri 23-Dec-16 08:13:27

Oh I don't know why I've typed ds in op

He's only three so he wasn't out till that late lol

LardLizard Fri 23-Dec-16 08:15:04

Hasn't said anything yet

I came downstairs when the alarm went off at 730 as my tummy feels a bit funny

And he's still in bed

DeepanKrispanEven Fri 23-Dec-16 08:15:09

Why did you have to text your friend anyway? It's no more dangerous driving home at midnight than driving home in the dark after work at 5.30 - do you feel the need to text all your friends that you've got home safely when you do that?

user1480946351 Fri 23-Dec-16 08:16:00

You know that is incredibly controlling behaviour, right? He insists you go to bed when he wants you to, like a child? He complains about you daring to go out and make the slightest noise coming in ?

None of that is normal. Is he controlling in other ways?

SalemSaberhagen Fri 23-Dec-16 08:17:18

Helpful, pseudonym hmm

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