My MIL very sadly died this week following a short illness. We live a long way away from her so I feel very grateful that we made it down to see her this weekend and she had the chance to see my DD4 ( who is her only grandchild). My DH has returned home today and he has told DD that granny has died. She asked a few questions but seemed slightly oblivious about what death is. My husband has been discussing the arrangements for the funeral which are a cremation followed by a church service and a gathering / food/ wake. He assumed that our DD would be attending all parts of this. I was actually a bit horrified about her attending the cremation - that is absolutely not what I want her to remember of her granny. The whole coffin behind the curtain thing is bad enough and I know my husband will be in pieces. I am happy to answer questions about life and death but I don't want her to imagine granny lying in a coffin or being cremated. I am quite happy for her to go to the church service and the wake but she will be the only child attending. If I asked her she would say she wants to go but she would have no idea of what she was agreeing to. I genuinely don't know if IABU. Unfortunately the long distance from us means that there is no- one to watch her for us for the cremation part so I would need to look after her for that part, and as a result would not be able to be with my DH for arguably the most upsetting bit. WWYD?
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AIBU?
Family bereavement - young children at the crematorium
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SpiritedLondon · 21/12/2016 20:02
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