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To be absolutely petrified of raising my baby alone??

(8 Posts)
WynterBlossom Wed 21-Dec-16 18:00:57

So the prospect wasn't that worrying before. However after witnessing my nephew have a massive fit over not wanting a bloody bath.....the thought of having to deal with everything to do with parenting on my own & having absolutely no back up from the father....actually makes me emotional!!

I know I'm jumping ahead here but let's be honest. What's the chances of my child being perfect?? It's inevitable il have to deal with a lot!

MrsLyons Wed 21-Dec-16 18:02:10

The chances of your child being perfect???

None whatsoever.

May as well get used to that now grin

MrsLyons Wed 21-Dec-16 18:02:41

But that has nothing to do with the fact that you'll be raising him as a single parent!!

FlopIsMyParentingGuru Wed 21-Dec-16 18:05:58

And each time they drive you round the bend you'll find a way to cope because it's part of a larger relationship with them. A mother and child.
And the love you feel for your nephew will be completely eclipsed by the love and bond you feel with your son or daughter.
Every tantrum will be counter balanced by the smile they give you when you walk up to their cot in the morning. Or the special snugly hugs they give only you. Or the fact that when they fall, or when they get scared, it's you they look to for comfort.
It's a different ballgame.

Blossomdeary Wed 21-Dec-16 18:05:59

Most single parents find ways to manage - with the help of friends and family. It is not easy - but raising children never is. Sometimes it is easier to be able to make your own decisions about discipline or dealing with difficult situations.

If you are struggling, it is worth seeing whether there is a branch of Home Start or Gingerbread near you.

ThirdTimeLuck Wed 21-Dec-16 18:07:24

YANBU to be scared, but that's the way whether you're raising a child alone or not. The prospect of dealing with any tantrum when you haven't really done it before is scary. But please believe the cliche when I say "it's different when it's your own child" because it's absolutely true. By the time your baby is having tantrums you'll have him/her sussed. You'll know what to do and when you don't you won't feel as panicked about it as you do now.

The prospect is far more scary than the reality, you'll be just fine. And when you're not you're in good company with the rest of the parenting world winebrewcake x

WynterBlossom Wed 21-Dec-16 18:15:09

Oh I do bloody hope so!

Raising my son alone wasn't my choice, my ex made that decision for me (I can't expect him to stay if he doesn't want to be with me).

I know il get on with it, I am more than expecting it to be the hardest thing I've ever done but I guess like you've said, it's different when it's your own.

TwitterQueen1 Wed 21-Dec-16 18:21:17

You will be fine - because you will be his mum. And that's what matters.

My advice would be to pick your battles. So he doesn't want a bath... so what? Just say "oh ok, so you'll have one tomorrow then..." really, who cares about baths..

I remember when we had visitors - old uni friends - and I said let's go to the park.... (I had 3 under 8 at that point). Youngest was wearing a Tiger suit. Uni friend said your DD needs to get changed 1st - she can't go like that. I said, "Why not?" She wore her Tiger suit to the park... everything was OK. The world didn't end.

Just remember - most stuff doesn't actually matter at all, so don't stress it - save your resources for the big stuff.

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