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To get a puppy?

(24 Posts)
Wwydhere Tue 20-Dec-16 14:04:41

Going to be completely honest here.

Am on disability benefits for MH issues.
DH left last year.
Am going through a lot of sadness and loneliness.
A friends mum has a pup from a litter who's owners pulled out last minute.
She has offered me the pup before anyone else.

I am not well off of course in my situation but I recently received a backpayment of money owed to me from the government over a period of 12 months.
And also an unexpected payment I didn't think I was going to get back from over a year ago in regards to compensation. Only a 3 figure sum.
I can also afford insurance and food although I am entitled to PDSA treatment if needed (I would always contribute as much as I could)

I think the pup might give me a reason to get up in the morning but feel people might judge me for having a puppy right now. Especially as it's not a 'mongrel'.

WIBU to get him?

HoHoHammered Tue 20-Dec-16 14:06:18

You never know, a pup could help your mentally.

Give you a reason to get out everyday and a good companion

As long as you want the pup, go for it.

Don't be pressured into getting it if you don't want a dog

Wwydhere Tue 20-Dec-16 14:06:25

The reason I can afford the food insurance is because I literally don't do anything. Drink. Smoke. Socialise.
I just look after my kids and have no friends to go anywhere with so I do have some disposal income after the basics.

Costacoffeeplease Tue 20-Dec-16 14:06:59

Puppies are extremely hard work, for a long time, are you prepared for that? Have you had a pup before?

What breed is it?

Costacoffeeplease Tue 20-Dec-16 14:07:31

How old are the children?

Wolfiefan Tue 20-Dec-16 14:07:59

I would think very carefully. And I say that as someone who brought a puppy home a couple of weeks ago.
Very bloody expensive. Microchip and lead and collar and crate and crate for car and food and toys and bowls and brush and ....
Puppy can't be left for a minute. We are working on this.
The wee. Good lord. The wee. We are working on this.
The chewing. FFS. The chewing. Also working on.
Co sleeping with puppy. Getting up in night.
Cost of spay, flea and worm treatments and vaccinations.
Dogs are great company. Puppies are bloody hard work!

Wwydhere Tue 20-Dec-16 14:08:29

I had a pup of the same breed in my 20s. He passed away about 7 years ago of cancer aged 11.
It isn't a hard breed. Just a lapdog.

YelloDraw Tue 20-Dec-16 14:09:02

Could be good but you need to make sure you are realistic about the amount of work a pup is. It will be tiring, a bit stressful, there will be thru the night toilet trips, puppy destruction, lots of work to train it.

If you think you can cope with that, go for it.

HoHoHammered Tue 20-Dec-16 14:09:48

Just remember not all lapdogs are lapdogs

Some can be very energetic even if the usual breed description says lazy

FooFighter99 Tue 20-Dec-16 14:09:49

We have a dog, he doesn't cost us that much to feed and insure every month.

I think a puppy would lift your spirits, be an excellent companion and give you a new lease on life fsmile

Please post pics of the furry bundle when you get him/her!!

TrionicLettuce Tue 20-Dec-16 14:09:54

Have you had a puppy before? Don't underestimate how soul destroying the early weeks can be if not. A dog might help you mentally but a puppy could also easily break you if you're already feeling a bit fragile.

Is the puppy of a breed you would have chosen had you been planning to get a dog? Has the pup been bred responsibly, with all necessary health tests done on the parents and appropriate consideration given to health, temperament, conformation and levels of inbreeding?

YelloDraw Tue 20-Dec-16 14:10:33

Cool so you are an experienced puppy owner and know the realities.

Go for it!

BarbarianMum Tue 20-Dec-16 14:10:36

A puppy would be a reason for you to get up in the morning but your kids aren't? I'm not wanting to judge but how bad are things with you right now?

Wwydhere Tue 20-Dec-16 14:12:33

Sorry I meant when the kids aren't here. They stay with their dad weekends and half the school holidays and on those days I literally have no reason to get out of bed.

Wwydhere Tue 20-Dec-16 14:13:39

Of course when the kids are here I stay focused. It's when I'm alone I get upset and feel a bit lost.

My youngest is 7.

BarbarianMum Tue 20-Dec-16 14:14:47

Ok, sorry, with you now blush Then yes, I think the puppy would be an excellent idea if you want it and it's then right breed/size etc

EssentialHummus Tue 20-Dec-16 14:17:30

I don't see why not OP. Just be careful about the breed. I know you say you've had the same before, but there are some breeds whose names crop up again and again for serious (expensive) health issues, and I don't think it'd be a good idea to get one of these.

humblesims Tue 20-Dec-16 14:17:34

I think if you have had a dog before then you know the work and commitment involved so i would say Yes get the dog. Never worry about being judged by other people. Life is too short to care what other people think. As long as you are able to care for the dog and provide for its needs that is all that matters.

BlueKarou Tue 20-Dec-16 14:19:22

If you are certain you could look after a puppy (and subsequently a dog for the next potentially 20 years) then it's just down to whether you/the kids want one;

If you can afford to pay for food, booster jabs, any vet treatment it needs (you mention insurance - that's great as it will make any unexpected emergencies easier to deal with financially)

If you can be sure you will have the time and energy to exercise, socialise and train a puppy. You say it's a lap dog, but in my experience even the most chilled out adult dogs had their wild moments as puppies. If you think you can manage the worst of the puppy months (years?!) otherwise hold off and look for an adult dog.

Sounds like you know what you're talking about, you've had dogs before, you know where you're at financially. Only you will know whether you're really in a good place for bringing a puppy home. As long as the heart and the head both get an equal say in things then you know what the right decision is.

(And, of course, if this friend's puppy wasn't the right one for you then there'd be nothing stopping you from saying 'no' to them and heading to Dog's Trust to have a look at the slightly older dogs in need of homes. Sorry - had to get on my rescue soap box for a moment.)

stonecircle Tue 20-Dec-16 14:19:56

I'm the first person to slate posters for getting dogs for the wrong reasons or without having thought through the implications. But yes. I think you should go ahead. It sounds like you could be very good for each other.

TheSlaughterOfHerodificado Tue 20-Dec-16 14:23:33

If you feel you can cope with the housetraining and walking etc - then I would say "get the pup". Microchipping is about £15 - the breeder should have done this before the pup leaves its mother, but of course s/he may not be vaccinated, which will be a bout £50-£60.

I would suggest that you get a dog if you can, rather than a bitch, then if you are unable to afford neutering , or can't face the thought of your pup going under an anaesthetic, then it isn't so serious. Yu can leave him entire (though you still have a responsibility to keep him away from other people's bitches. There is actually quite a lot of evidence that neutering isn't as(medically) necessary for males as for females.

You don't say what breed the pup is - only that it's a lapdog. Will it need professional clipping/grooming? This can be expensive and cost about £50 every 6 weeks to 3 months, depending on the breed.

If you decide to go ahead I hope that you find that the pup stimulates your interest in life again, and that walking and training it helps you to feel better.

I don't blame you for finding your children wearying rather than stimulating - I did too when I had severe depression. I loved them to bits but I didn't have the energy to cope with their natural liveliness and naughtiness - children are hard work! But so are young puppies - please don't forget that. Sometimes housetraining seems to take forever, and even when you think you've cracked it, there can be a relapse.

I have to admit that we got a pup last year, and I'd forgotten how much hard work they are - we never stopped for a moment - cleaning up, feeding, training, more cleaning up, getting her to stop eating furniture, cleaning up again - it has only just started to calm down and she is over a year old now.

But best of luck whatever you decide.

dollydaydream114 Tue 20-Dec-16 14:24:04

Usually I would say don't get the puppy, but as you've had a dog of the same breed before and are sure you can afford it ... maybe in your case it would be the right thing.

Just remember that all puppies can be hard work and quite stressful as well as expensive. Not all puppies are the same, even of the same breed. But if you feel you can cope with that and are sure you'll be able to get out and walk the dog daily (even lapdogs need to get out of the house/garden every day for mental stimulation as well as exercise) and that your children can be sensible around a tiny pup (lapdogs tend not to like chaos) then yes, it could be good for you.

You could even take the pup to puppy socialisation/training classes - you might meet some people as well as just getting out of the house. And a walk round the park for some fresh air every day would be a good thing for you, as well as your dog.

Sonders Tue 20-Dec-16 14:35:04

OP do you plan to go back to work in the next few years? If you know someone will always be around to care for the dog during the day then it sounds like a lovely treat for yourself and your family.

midsummerwoods Tue 20-Dec-16 14:36:21

Sounds like it might be a really positive move for you flowers

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