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This is how I want to live in my retirement/if I found myself alone - AIBU?

(140 Posts)
PacificDogwod Fri 09-Dec-16 16:27:25

They were in the news this morning

I had never heard of this group and know nothing about them specifically.

But surely the idea of living in larger groups while your privacy is also maintained, but with support of others around you is the way forward?
I do NOT expect nor want my DCs to care for me - if they want to be in contact with me, great, but I know I cannot make them and I would not wish them to feel obliged (I've seen my mother almost finished off by caring for my demented grandmother who lived to 101 shock).

It's the idea of community that appeals.
That, and no men grin - they just complicate things!

What are your thoughts?

gleam Fri 09-Dec-16 16:38:20

Sounds interesting but too much community for me.
If someone builds one for introverts, I'm in.

OohhThatsMe Fri 09-Dec-16 16:39:10

I was reading about this, too, but I was put off by the fact men weren't allowed!

Iloveswears Fri 09-Dec-16 16:46:37

Love it.

PacificDogwod Fri 09-Dec-16 16:49:51

Men are not allowed to live there - I imagine that residents will be 'allowed' a private life. Which may even include men if they wish grin

I was wondering about 'too much community' myself, I quite like being on my own, but I think they actually have a balance. Own flat, own door that can be closed/locked and communal spaces that one can use if one wishes to mingle.

I bet nobody living there will be lying dead behind their door for 3 days before they are found sad.

There are too many lonely and isolated people out there, and it is worse for the older ones.

ExitPursuedBySantaSpartacus Fri 09-Dec-16 16:53:56

It's a great idea but I just know I would be organising activities and outings before I had unpacked my kettle.

I can't resist a bit of organising.

BreconBeBuggered Fri 09-Dec-16 16:55:40

Sounds like a hall of residence for older women. Lovely.

ExcuseMyEyebrows Fri 09-Dec-16 16:57:36

I saw it this morning and thought it looked wonderful.

AmeliaJack Fri 09-Dec-16 16:58:09

It's a lovely idea but living with a group of women would drive me crazy.

Potentially all the issues you see on MN with school gates/gossip/mean girls and Queen Bees but somewhere you live. Yikes.

badtime Fri 09-Dec-16 16:58:59

Yeah, I was just thinking it sounds like halls, and that really suits some people.

Vixxfacee Fri 09-Dec-16 17:00:23

What happens with those men who identify as women, are they allowed to apply?

I think there should be more things like this with younger people too, especially in areas with high rents/ house prices.

hesterton Fri 09-Dec-16 17:02:42

If I were single, I would love something like this. And the women only thing wouldn't bother me - if I'm widowed at 90 I intend to do away matches for passion!

ZaZathecat Fri 09-Dec-16 17:05:28

Apart from that it's only for women, I can't see much difference between that and nice retirement flats (and tbh they're 95% full of women too). Separate flats, communal areas, optional activities organised by a manager.

Sgtmajormummy Fri 09-Dec-16 17:05:43

I think it has the possibility of going awfully wrong.

Having seen DM (an introvert by nature) as an active member of WI, church social organisations, food bank distribution and other activities mostly associated with "older women", the amount of bitching and backstabbing was unbelievable!

We all love to gossip but I think a community like that would be a hothouse. Who's getting too frail to look after herself? Who's losing touch with reality?

Not for me, I'm afraid.

Shiningexample Fri 09-Dec-16 17:07:13

it looks great but why does it need to be women only, men need nice places to live too

SaltyBitch Fri 09-Dec-16 17:07:17

Sounds bloody wonderful

OurBlanche Fri 09-Dec-16 17:10:16

Why does it need to be just women? Because the women who thought of it, raised money for it and live in it want it to be. No other reason needed, surely?

FurryLittleTwerp Fri 09-Dec-16 17:13:15

sounds wonderful :-)

whyohwhy000 Fri 09-Dec-16 17:14:30

Larkfleet Homes have done something like this.
www.larkfleethomes.co.uk/exclusive-living-for-the-over-55s

SoupDragon Fri 09-Dec-16 17:14:41

Ugh. I can't imagine living with only women.

OurBlanche Fri 09-Dec-16 17:19:00

I have to admit I have half arsed thoughts of being a nun should my life go that way. Well, sort of, without the religion!

Cloistered, with plenty of time to grow veg read books, make/paint stuff, cook and not have to interact with the outside world... a modern, female Cadfael smile Sounds good to me!

Lorelei76 Fri 09-Dec-16 17:19:26

Oh it's gaining publicity
I said on another thread, I like the idea of adult women only in a block of flats but Ive no interest in the community bit, need to have one for introverts. Also worry how male friends would feel coming round. I'll ask some of them tomorrow. I'm really mostly a woman's woman.

eyelevelgrill Fri 09-Dec-16 17:20:08

not same-sex but my MIL and her husband live in a community like this.

She had grave doubts for all the reasons given above but is very pleased with it so far (2 years in)

the bitching/arguments happen but keep her young IYSWIM.

magimedi Fri 09-Dec-16 17:20:24

MIL & FIL lived in a (small) retired courtyard place & loved it to start with. But, when FIL died, as had quite a few other spouses in the development, the place became very quiet & MIL felt quite isolated & lonely at times.

I would far rather live with a mixed group of sexes & ages. Give me a bit of noise to moan about & lots of comings & goings to watch.

lalalalyra Fri 09-Dec-16 17:20:55

I think a community like that is a great idea. I'd prefer a mixed place, but I can see why some folks would like a female or male only set up.

When I was 8 or 9 I wanted to live in the sheltered housing complex my Nana's friend lived in. It has a few rows of bungalows and 3 blocks of flats. Then it's got a dining hall/cafe, a function room and a small bar. There used to be a list of events up on her wall and Nana's friend would tick the ones she liked and planned to go too. Other ones would be scored out on the basis they were organised by "Bossy Barbara" grin

I was tickled last week when I read in the local paper that the residents had had a collection for the 'old people's home' smile

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