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Was this rude of DD (to her teacher)? Undecided if she actually needs punishing...

(26 Posts)
SpainSummers Tue 29-Nov-16 23:34:48

Saw DD's teacher today, after school, who told me that she had to stay in at break to write lines (didn't know that was still a thing tbh) where she just had to say "sorry for being rude" until she had finished the whole page and then was able to go out for the last 5 mins, so she could use the toilet and have a snack.

Basically, her class are being taught recorder in music. I don't really think many end up learning how to properly play, after this topic they're encouraged to go to the recorder club and that's about it. DD fell in love with this recorder and spends bloody hours driving me mad learning to play and she finally got it and can play basic songs from a book now while being able to read the notes for it. This was over half term btw, they did a different topic when back after it and now have just started it again as they never finished it, they were all in lesson and DD was colouring on a bit of paper while teacher was speaking about the recorder and then the girl who sits next to her asked her why she didn't want to learn and she said that she can already play it. Teacher asked the girl what my DD just said to her so she said that she said that she can already play, so teacher said "well, you can show me at break time then can't you" and obviously she didn't get her to show her, it was obviously sarcastic and the way teacher explained it to me was obviously sarcastic and she then just got her to write the lines. I wouldn't have a massive issue if that was just left there but teacher has encouraged me to support the school and follow through with a punishment at home too. Is that really necessary? She's 9 btw.

This is quite long but didn't want to drop feed.

TyneTeas Tue 29-Nov-16 23:42:18

Doesn't sound great all round.

Was it the not paying attention (when colouring) and then chatting the teacher found rude?

Can understand your dd not feeling that she needed to, but in terms of a class can understand why the teacher found that less than ideal

ElizaSchuyler Tue 29-Nov-16 23:46:36

She reminds me of how I used to behave but fortunately I had an understanding teacher who used to let me play harmony lines above the BAG three blind mice mind numbness of the class. Perhaps the teache could challenge her more by giving her a treble instead?

Mummymummymummyhi Tue 29-Nov-16 23:49:53

Im confused, your daughter had to write lines because she said she already knows how to play recorder?

Yamadori Tue 29-Nov-16 23:52:58

Yes, I agree with TyneTeas, the teacher probably thought your dd should have been paying attention to the lesson rather than doodling.

Pallisers Tue 29-Nov-16 23:53:02

The teacher told you to punish her at home (in addition to the school punishment) for what seems a mild bit of inattention/talking in class??? Wow.

burgundyandgoldleaves Tue 29-Nov-16 23:53:13

If it was me, I'd tell my child not to colour in when the teacher is talking even if they already know something (assuming no SEN) and then leave it. No need for an additional punishment imo smile

WorraLiberty Tue 29-Nov-16 23:53:21

Lines are useless, as is forcing an apology.

The teacher should have explained that your DD doesn't get to pick and choose when to do what she's told and she wasn't told she could sit there colouring in.

There will be many times in her school life when she'll already know something she's being taught (as will other kids at times) but that doesn't mean they can take it upon themselves to do as they please and ignore the lesson.

However, if your DD doesn't realise this at her age, the teacher should definitely have sat and explained it during the time she (rightly) kept her in, rather than giving her lines.

Ohdearducks Tue 29-Nov-16 23:54:07

I think this is probably more to do with your DD not listening (colouring in) while the teacher was talking (which is rude) and not the fact she can already play recorder.

WorraLiberty Tue 29-Nov-16 23:55:44

Sorry meant to say, a punishment at home is a ridiculous idea and totally unnecessary.

I could understand if the teacher was asking for your support, but not to give another punishment for the same crime.

Ohdearducks Tue 29-Nov-16 23:56:13

But I wouldn't punish at home, that's a bit much. Just a talk about paying attention even when the subject is boring is sufficient.

JenLindleyShitMom Tue 29-Nov-16 23:57:53

So teacher discovers a bored child doodling because she is already more than capable of doing what she is supposed to be learning and instead of teacher challenging her with something harder she punishes her? hmm I would not be supporting the school on this and I would be telling them why. I would also be wondering how the support other children who are ahead of their peers in other subjects of this is their reaction to your DD.

bumsexatthebingo Tue 29-Nov-16 23:59:50

Staying in for chatting/colouring when she's supposed to be listening to the teacher I can understand but I would have queried why the teacher wants you to punish her again at home. Is not listening in class a persistent issue maybe?

Redglitter Wed 30-Nov-16 00:00:59

She's already been punished for it. A second punishment would be unfair and un necessary. The punishment she's already had seems over the top as it is

Patriciathestripper1 Wed 30-Nov-16 00:02:39

Wtf? She wasn't being rude to the teacher she was answering a classmates question.
I would tell the teacher that you will talk to your DD about the incident but as she was already punished you do not see the need for further punishment.

Buck3t Wed 30-Nov-16 00:03:15

Right on! [Fist pump]

Cucumber5 Wed 30-Nov-16 00:05:59

It wasn't sarcastic. The teacher is wrong (unless the punishment was about something else?) Go talk to her.

WorraLiberty Wed 30-Nov-16 00:07:55

Answering the classmate's question isn't why the teacher thinks she was rude.

She was rude to ignore the teacher/lesson and start doing her own thing.

Let's face it, if every kid did that because they thought they knew it all (whether they did or didn't), the school day would be mayhem.

If a child has excelled in a subject during the school holidays, then it's up to the parent to point this out to the school and ask if there's any extra provision for them.

You can't expect a teacher to take what they're being told at face value. How to they know what happened to every kid during the holiday?

gleam Wed 30-Nov-16 00:11:28

I would not support the school in this.
Where was the punishment for the other girl asking the question? (Needless imo, but op's child wasn't talking until then, so it could be argued that she was the class disrupter.)
Where's the encouragement for the extra learning op's dd has done in her own time?

viques Wed 30-Nov-16 00:12:39

Well of course she was being rude to the teacher. do you not understand how it works in classrooms? You listen, you do not distract by fiddling about and you do not carry on private conversations. It is called low level disruption, wastes everyone's time and energy and is frustrating for the teacher and the children who are trying to learn.

No the child does not deserve a punishment at home as well but I think the parent needs to remind their child how to behave in school.

JenLindleyShitMom Wed 30-Nov-16 00:14:37

You can't expect a teacher to take what they're being told at face value. How to they know what happened to every kid during the holiday?

Well it would have been very easy to prove wouldn't it?

"Oh lovely, you can give us all a little demonstration so everyone knows how it should sound"

Two birds, one stone. Gives the bored child something to do other than doodle, show the teacher her ability so they can decide what song to give her to challenge her.

Buck3t Wed 30-Nov-16 00:19:47

Feeling like a stalker here, but right on!

Spring2016 Wed 30-Nov-16 00:30:00

She doodled, she was caught and did her punishment. Which was not even correct imo. I feel she should have written I will pay attention in class, as I do not see her as being rude. I would not punish her further.

Yamadori Wed 30-Nov-16 00:38:51

She was ignoring the teacher and doodling so yes, that was rudeness.

Tezza1 Wed 30-Nov-16 00:41:05

I think this is probably more to do with your DD not listening (colouring in) while the teacher was talking (which is rude) and not the fact she can already play recorder.
I must admit that as an adult (and ex-teacher) I've sat in numerous meetings and lectures doodling, playing boxes with myself, word games, etc to stop myself from screaming with boredom. One of my favourites used to be to see how long I could go without blinking.

I used to often have sympathy for students.

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