Xmas decorations wibu?(58 Posts)
We usually start putting up the decorations and tree from the 1st December but yesterday I got a few bits down from the attic after nipping up there for something else I needed. I'm not getting a tree until the end of next week but I thought I'd put the Xmas throws on the sofa, tinsel wrapped round things, a few Xmas light up snowmen ornament things and a set of lights around the window in the living room Just to make things cosy and festive. It's was on a whim and I just thought sod it and the kids thought it was exciting and fun. I suffer from pnd and had one of those really really exhausting times this week trying to wallow on through with school runs and housework while feeling like I just want to hide under the duvet until the feeling goes away. DH is so lovely and supportive and knows I've had a rough week . He really is wonderful with how he understands what I'm going through and how I struggle sometimes. He knows my favourite thing to do when I'm feeling really down is to just cuddle up on the sofa with a coffee and a book or a glass of wine. I was looking forward to doing this once I had got the kids to bed and looking forward to this on a night helps me keep motivated to tidy up and do housework throughout the day iyswim . Anyway he came in from work as I was putting the kids to bed and me and dd started giggling saying "wait for it when daddy sees the Xmas lights do you think he will be surprised!?" ... so we were giggling as he came up stairs expecting him to laugh at us and say how nice and cosy the room looked as he loves Xmas and always says he looks forward to me trimming up. Instead he walks in and says " what's the hells going on? Why is all Xmas stuff up downstairs it's November!!" ... so I explained it's only a week off before December and he went mad saying he's fed up of seeing everyone's trees and trimmings up everywhere it's ridiculous and looks tacky. DD got quite upset at the thought we would have to take them down. When I went downstairs he had also taken down some tinsel that I had hung over some shelves in the kitchen and just dumped it on the side. Then he went in the room and turned the lights off in the window just going on about how he can't believe what I've done. It was just so out of character for him I was really shocked and hurt at the things he was saying like it was a massive deal and like I'd ruined Xmas. I don't know I just expected him to come in and laugh and call me daft "but as long as it helps you and cheers you up a bit" is what he would usually say. It just seemed as though I'd done something so so wrong his reaction was just so excessive and out of character. There really is worse things in the world going on right now other than putting up a few lights a week before usual. Aibu?
It would probably annoy me too . I can't stand Christmas before December -I don't care what people do in their own home, but I wouldn't want tinsel and lights up in November. If he is usually supportive, maybe you just caught him on a bad day?
I'm sorry, I know how you feel - I'm a huge christmas enthusiast as well - but it really is too early.
If his reaction was excessive and out of character, do you think there's something else going on with him?
The thing is any other year It wouldn't have even crossed my mind to trim up before December. It truly was on a whim and one of those
fuckit moments. It's just his reaction seemed bizarre for him. I don't think there's anything else going on with him I just think he thought I was taking the piss when I've tried to explain to him I genuinely thought he'd laugh and say it looked nice. My mistake I suppose I know not to do it again next year
He might just have been a bit grumpy! We all have days where our tolerance level is a bit lower. I admittedly would have thought 'oh for fucks sake!' and would have taken down the tinsel and turned off the christmas lights (particularly if they were in the front window).
Try not to take it personally. It's November-he doesn't want Christmas things up. I doubt he has taken them down to upset you on purpose.
I fucking hate Christmas stuff up before December, it's just the whole early onset of it has killed any joy or fun I have for it, and I associate early decorations with the over comersialised crapfest that Christmas has become. Shops only start so early, so that they can peddle their shite to people who only live for Christmas via presents. Someone I know put there's up on the 6th November, it's taking the piss.
I would think my DH was mental if he put up tinsel in November. But I would snarl at him and take it down - it's his house as well. Sounds out of character. Is he quite stressed out?
I've got a few Christmas bits up already op, your not the only one.
Sounds like he had a shit day and was already annoyed about something else. Maybe ask if all is ok at work, if his usually fine with things like this then it does seem ott for him.
Much as I love Christmas the problem with putting up stuff in November is that it dilutes the magic of December and Xmas a bit. Personally I love decorating the house but by am getting a bit bor d of it by 1st Jan! Which is why I wait till December.
Not sure I see the link with pnd. You do sound a bit bored have you thought of volunteering? Helping in a charity shop in the run up to Xmas or the food bank etc etc.
I don't think your husband was unreasonable, he is allowed to have an opinion!
No excuse for his behaviour though, even if it is early does it really warrant his reaction?
fan you have it up until January?! Mine comes down on boxing day, that's why it goes up early.
Randy the 6th is definitely too early! No I can see where everyone's coming from because I myself have been annoyed at seeing Xmas stuff too early any other year so I don't really know what has got into me to stick a few bits up this week I know part of me imagined while I have the get up and go and energy to do it that I had to do it there and then before my batteries run out again for weeks on end! I'm really fed up I just want to be back on my feet and smile again I think a selection box or a chocolate orange would have been a better and smaller festive option to try cheer myself up
Decorations stay up till 2nd Jan.
We like having them up for the new year festivities. But then I just want them down. I don't like starting the year with the decorations still up.
Mouldycheesefan with the way I feel at the moment with the pnd I suppose I'm clutching at every straw with things that will cheer me up or make me look froward to something. Christmas makes me happy with everything about it like the films and mince pies and general coziness When the house is trimmed up and all Christmassy I look forward to coming home or coming downstairs on a morning without feeling the dread that my depression brings most days. I don't know I think I just imagined it would make me feel better plus I felt good with the kids being excited about it all and helping. Felt like I was being a proper mum for a few hours.
I sometimes put stuff up at the end of November, I'm putting my tree up on Saturday but we all really love Christmas.
His reaction does seem a bit extreme and would suggest other things going on with him.
Sorry he pissed on your chips festive
Suppose it's not classed as pnd anymore
How old is the baby? Are you getting treatment for the pnd?
I do think doing something outside the home could help and if you love Xmas this could be the best time to do some voluntary work where people. Value you and your contribution and you aren't stuck in the house all day. But if you have a small baby that may be tricky. 💐
Wifeyhun that's what I saw it as, just putting a few "bits" up. Probably got a little carried away though with the lights in the window I think that's what has bothered him mostly. If we had an artificial tree up in the attic too I know I wouldn't have put that up yesterday as i still feel I need to wait till after the first for that but we have already discussed the other day we are going to go pick one on the 5th. Good for you though I'm glad I'm not the only one
Yeah as much as I would love to its just not possible at the moment as I have the school runs and then my littlest with me everyday until she goes to nursery next year. Yes I'm getting treatment and I'm usually "on the mend" I'm just having a setback in the last month or so. I've always suffered with it after every birth. This time it doesn't feel it's going away though. Like I said though DH is so supportive and wonderful just apart from this hiccup
I dont think its too early at all, ours are going up at the weekend, I dont get why anyone cares about what people do to their own homes. And as for "oh its too early and bored of it come Christmas day" type thing, might do for the people that say this but not for me, Im never bored of them, certainly doesnt dilute anything either.
Sorry OP your DH has made you feel so bad.
batshit MIL put hers up over a week ago. I'm sorry that your dh made you feel bad, and I empathise wholly with your pnd, but it's November.
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