to want a best friend

(24 Posts)
tupperwareAARGGH Wed 23-Nov-16 22:50:16

thats it really, I have friends but I don't have a best friend.

I don't have anyone to ring for special occasions or make me feel special.

There is no one to make me feel special. Its my birthday tomorrow, its going to be just another day, no phone calls as rarely get any anyway. I've had present from friends which is lovely but the actual day is going to be uneventful.

I watch people have these lives with close friends where they are always doing stuff etc I have no idea what this is like.

I'm just feeling very lonely tonight and realising this is going to be my life.

baconandeggies Wed 23-Nov-16 23:43:56

Happy birthday! cakewineflowers

I think there should be sort of 'online dating' for best friends iyswim..

NatNad Wed 23-Nov-16 23:51:46

Happy Birthday 🎉 try to enjoy your day regardless of the other stuff. I'm in the same boat wth friends. Everyone seems to have an a amazing bestie and I get as far as "acquaintance" type friendships with others. My best friend is my sister, other then that no real close friendships with anyone 😟

altkat Wed 23-Nov-16 23:58:35

Happy birthday for tomorrow! flowers cake

It is pants - I'm in that boat too. My best friend of 11 years has properly drifted off since their new partner, I've moved to a new city and have a tiny baby. On occasion I feel so lonely I could spit. YY to a friend-matching site!

NewDayNewBeginnings Thu 24-Nov-16 00:01:03

I'm the same.. I'll be your bestie and you can be mine grin

CalamityPayne Thu 24-Nov-16 00:03:37

Same, I'd love to have a friend I could just enjoy being with.
Let's all set up a best friend matchmaking site - then we can be rich AND get friends!

Note3 Thu 24-Nov-16 00:07:12

Me too...friends, no besties. Sometimes I'm at peace with that and sometimes it's lonely as anything.

Happy birthday for tomorrow

YelloDraw Thu 24-Nov-16 00:25:26

I believe clicking with a best friend is as much right time / right place / chemistry as it is finding a romantic partner.

user1477282676 Thu 24-Nov-16 00:27:59

Happy Birthday for tomorrow OP! Listen to this....someone once told me that if you envision a different sort of life for yourself, you need to make it happen...not wish for it or be sad because it's not there.

Why not think about this for next year now? Invite some people out next year...arrange a party?

myoriginal3 Thu 24-Nov-16 00:30:47

Happy birthday buddy.

Gracey1231 Thu 24-Nov-16 00:31:42

Happy birthday Hun!
I'll be your friend x

AutumnalLeaves38 Thu 24-Nov-16 00:36:53

flowers HAPPY BIRTHDAY, tupperware! cake wine

I hope you do something nice to mark the occasion, no matter how small, just because.

"I'm just feeling very lonely tonight and realising this is going to be my life"

Remember that, although you may not be where you want to be this birthday, with regards to friendships, you could well be closer to that ideal by next year's.

Perhaps you could treat yourself to a lovely notebook today (present to yourself), in which to jot down ideas as to how to work towards that goal?

Pour yourself a glass of something nice, put on some favourite music, and enjoy half an hour of thinking about what qualities you'd like in a close friend? What interests would you like to share together? How would you spend a perfect afternoon? etc. etc.

Doesn't matter how unlikely or unachievable it seems right now...at this stage, simply sowing a few seeds of belief that it can change is the first step.

You may well surprise yourself!

Gemz1806 Thu 24-Nov-16 00:49:53

Have you got someone you can reconnect with?? My best friend now was best friend from school but we lost touch for about 2-3 years, we still lived only 50 miles apart, but then one day one of us picked up the phone and no time had passed! You've got nothing to lose from a wee text or a FB message?

crazyspaniellady Thu 24-Nov-16 01:01:48

Happy birthday! With copious amounts of cake chocolate & wine

I was in the same boat as you, only I had very few friends (I still do but I digress) my best friendship just kind of popped up out of nowhere really, she's my SIL but we discovered we had lots in common after years of polite conversation at family things, it was only when our DPs started doing more things together we chatted more and now it's like I've known her all my life.

Don't worry about it too much, I feel like best friends are hard to come by but you will find someone who's your "friend soulmate" and it'll just click so perfectly, you'll be left wondering why it took so long! smile

MumGoneCrazy Thu 24-Nov-16 01:10:30

Happy Birthday tupperware 🎉🎁🎂🎁🎉

I'd love to have even a friend, had DS when I was 16 and was promptly dropped by all friends, moved around a lot so any new people I started to strike up friendship with didn't last long and even though I'm back in area I grew up in no one seems to be interested in being friends with me.
I must just have one of them faces grin

torroloco Thu 24-Nov-16 01:25:57

You can have mine if you want OP- he is high maintenance, a pain in my arse and a bossy get.

I love him lots realllly

grin

Happy birthday smile

judybloomno5 Thu 24-Nov-16 03:18:11

I'm the same. I've got my DH whose probably the best I'm going to have but I'd love a bestie I don't have to sleep with 😜 All my friends have best mates and I'm an 'also ran' think at 33 if I was supposed to have a best mate I'd have met them by now

DorothyHarris Thu 24-Nov-16 03:36:27

Happy birthday. I'm the same. I had one but she has a new one and I have three small kids so I get left out of everything, I know how you feel cake

daisychain01 Thu 24-Nov-16 05:04:30

Hope you have a lovely birthday.

I'd carry on with the friends you have and over time you may find through circumstance one or other of them may become closer. I wouldn't put store in the mythical best friend. It may never happen but that's not a negative, it's because people's lives go through phases and needs change over time as other priorities take over.

Not being funny but best friends are for school and uni where you're all together tracking along the same path for several years and every thing is stable. Once in the RW everyone's lives change pace and direction. Difficult to have one best friend when you're all doing different stuff.

Chamonix1 Thu 24-Nov-16 06:26:12

Happy Birthday!! winecakeflowers

Mebee Thu 24-Nov-16 06:41:32

Happy birthday op cakeflowers

I was the same until I met DH, he's the best friend I could ever wish for.

Alex83 Thu 24-Nov-16 06:54:36

Happy birthday!! cake

I'm sorry you're feeling lonely OP, birthdays can be a hard time of year.

I have friends but no best friend. My best friends are my sister and my mum... I don't think it's unusual to have your family as your best friends (is it?? hmm ) Are you close with your family?

olderthanyouthink Thu 24-Nov-16 08:30:29

Happy birthday!

flowerschocolate

I barely have friends at the moment.

How about we all be best friends and trade necklaces, bracelets, or other cheap crap from Claire's?

tupperwareAARGGH Sun 04-Dec-16 10:33:25

So sorry for delay in replying kept falling asleep early every night!

Thank you for your kind words. I did nothing on my birthday but did meet up with a couple of friends on Saturday day time to take my son bowling and a meal afterwards.

I've seen plenty of crap that could easily be traded at Claire's older grin

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