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AIBU re dog off lead this morning

(61 Posts)
HyacinthBouvier Tue 22-Nov-16 11:03:19

Ddog has social issues with other larger dogs but lovely with puppies, most female dogs, cats, kids and people in general. He's perfect socially 90% of the time.

Were trying to improve his social skills by training with treats and praise etc and it's working in that he isn't interested in other dogs at all when out walking.

People I know have suggested that my keeping him on the lead around other dogs won't help him as we think his problem is fear-aggression, which I totally agree with, but I am not sure there's a safe alternative

Hes a Staffie cross and I don't want to be responsible for worsening an already bad reputation if he was to nip another dog/get into a fight.

Today a stupid woman encouraged her Staffie to bolt over to us, Ddog was on lead, happily sniffing a lamppost, DS was strapped to me in stretchy wrap.

I saw her bolt over and shouted (stupid woman was at least 20 metres away, naturally) that my dog was nervous can she call hers back.

Her dog was very sweet and stopped a metre short of us (better manners than her owner!) but Ddog was eyeballing her so I walked on, keeping him on close lead but could hear SW mouthing off that if I lived round here I'd know her dog was friendly.

I said it wasn't the point, I love dogs but had my dog on a lead as he gets scared when approached.

She clearly wanted a fight (I suspect not the first time she's been told to use a lead) and quizzed me further on whether I 'lived round here' - still don't get the relevance, because even I said I did she kept saying but not 'round HERE' - the park?! Who knows?

I explained that she shouldn't allow her dog to bound over to a dog on a lead when she's nowhere near by and her answer was that if my dog can't cope with it, he should be muzzled as he's dangerous. WTF?!

Important to note that while this exchange was happening, her dog was bouncing round us and barking - still off lead as she didn't actually have one, and Ddog was just growling at her.

AIBU to think that my on-lead dog doesn't need a muzzle if the only time he's not friendly is when an off lead dog charges at him and won't leave him alone?!

YellowBlueBus Tue 22-Nov-16 11:10:33

YANBU. Any sensible dog owner, on seeing that your dog is on the lead (presumably for a reason) would reciprocate by calling their own to dog to heel.

Mishegoss Tue 22-Nov-16 11:12:30

She's an asshole. Yanbu

SVJAA Tue 22-Nov-16 11:13:24

As a Staffie cross owner I'm hyper aware of the reputation they wrongly have and wouldn't have ours off the lead in a park. I definitely wouldn't allow her to bound up to someone holding/carrying a baby and a clearly nervous dog. Stupid woman.

bummymummy77 Tue 22-Nov-16 11:13:42

Same happens to me. Our dog is part husky so bolts off lead. Cue everyone else's dog always attacking her then people blaming me for not having her off leash! Boils my piss. angry

mumonashoestring Tue 22-Nov-16 11:14:01

YANBU. Dog owners like her are a bloody menace. If someone asks you to call your dog away you do it, end of.

tabulahrasa Tue 22-Nov-16 11:16:37

"AIBU to think that my on-lead dog doesn't need a muzzle if the only time he's not friendly is when an off lead dog charges at him and won't leave him alone?!"

Depends how not friendly he is TBH - I muzzle mine because there's a fairly high chance he'll give an over friendly dog harassing him a pretty bad bite.

But morally, no, if your dog is always on lead then other dogs shouldn't be near enough to warrant a muzzle, sadly, that's not how it actually works because too many people own dogs who don't understand that dogs that rush over and try to play with an unwilling dog aren't friendly, they're bullies with social issues and that responsible owners only let their dogs off lead if they've got good recall.

Fanofjapan Tue 22-Nov-16 11:21:31

If a dog off lead comes up or near to mine, I always ask the owner to call their dog off. I mostly don't need to as usually dog owners realise my dog is on a lead for a reason. He's an Akita so not able to be let off. Even so, I don't want other people's dogs off lead running up to me or him. I love dogs, but on my own terms! Had an incident the other day where this woman's dog ran across a road over to mine, despite her trying to recall it. She was very apologetic, but I was more worried about her dog getting run over. Luckily the approaching cars saw it and were able to stop. Also as bummymummy said above, due to his breed, my dog would be the one to get the blame if anything went wrong!

livelyredjellybean Tue 22-Nov-16 11:21:33

Whenever I am working with someone who has a dog fearful of others, I ALWAYS advise muzzle training - even if the dog hasn't been aggressive. Mostly as its a wonderful visual signal that encourages others to keep their distance! Dogs can be trained to happily wear a muzzle, especially now there are muzzles available which still allow you to give food rewards relatively easily.

thedancingbear Tue 22-Nov-16 11:22:03

she's a dick. YANBU

Godstopper Tue 22-Nov-16 11:23:14

If your dog can be unpredictable, of course YANBU. You might want to consider a yellow lead - we have some success with ours (it says "Nervous").

I have a fear aggressive Border Terrier who sounds about where your dog is. She only goes off lead where I can see from all directions in wide open spaces, and I wouldn't even allow that if she didn't have a bombproof recall.

I am sick to death of those who say:

- My dog is friendly (right, so that magically turns mine into a sociable dog, does it? Don't put yours and mine in danger, fool)

- If she's aggressive, she shouldn't be out (right, because keeping a high energy dog indoors solves things)

- You can't have trained her right (that's why we didn't do obedience for the first three years of her life with her ending up in the advanced-competing class, and why I continue to do stuff with her on a daily basis ... oh I know, maybe it's because she's a bit nervous anyway which was made worse when an out of control dog attacked her!)

The "I'm friendly" brigade are complete fuckmuppets. They say that, and then have a go at you if your on-lead dog dares to respond to another one jumping in its face - I guess they would stand still if someone leapt on them too. It's an invasion of space, and of course my dog will respond. She's NEVER bitten, it is a lot of hot air, and I'd rather it didn't happen. It rarely does, but every now and then, I'll meet someone who, despite being warned, persists anyway.

It's not hard to recall your dog, clip it on lead, etc so everyone can pass calmly. I have as much right to be walking about as you. It is just basic manners.

NavyandWhite Tue 22-Nov-16 11:24:04

She was in the wrong. Your dog was minding its own business.

Just lazy and inconsiderate dog ownership.

Sparkletastic Tue 22-Nov-16 11:25:20

She's a fool. Ddog got attacked by a staffie cross last week. I wish all owners were as responsible as you are.

HyacinthBouvier Tue 22-Nov-16 11:26:52

tabula I agree totally - we were very wary when we first got him but hes had young pups bash him in the face etc and he's only ever given them a warning snarl, and he's easily controlled on the lead as he's not massive, so I really don't think a muzzle is needed.

Annoyingly, when he's encountered other dogs off the lead (in open countryside) they have come out of nowhere and he's played nicely with them - we assume it's because he doesn't feel scared when he has space to run away.

I willl always call him to heel and put a lead on him if I can see another dog in the distance but have been reluctant to march in and end them playing and take him away in case it reinforces the message that other dogs are scary. We only ever let him off when we can see there's no other dogs about in a wide open space and his recall is spot on.

LonnyVonnyWilsonFrickett Tue 22-Nov-16 11:30:45

I think some dogs do behave differently on and off lead, but that's by the by isn't it? Your dog was on lead, you asked her to call hers off, she ignored you which makes her (to borrow a rather wonderful phrase from a pp) a total fuckmuppet.

HyacinthBouvier Tue 22-Nov-16 11:31:58

He also wore a muzzle for a year when he went out everyday with his dog walkers pack - he happily wore the muzzle but it made him more scared if anything and you will be AMAZED for many dipshits will be MORE relaxed about letting their dog approach as they know your dog can't do anything! So inconsiderate but I am kicking myself for trying to reason with her - she was walking a very bouncy Staffie in a small children's park, surrounded by roads, and she didn't even have a lead on her - clearly wasn't going to be reasoned with!

WasabiNell Tue 22-Nov-16 11:41:28

Yanbu, when I'm walking my dog I always ALWAYS shout ahead if I see a dog on the lead and ask if they want me to put my dog on a lead. Sometimes they say no and their dog is friendly and on the lead for something else, sometimes they say yes. It's just common decency!

OrlandaFuriosa Tue 22-Nov-16 11:44:28

Have you thought about a yellow ribbon?

But she sounds defensive and unpleasant.

HyacinthBouvier Tue 22-Nov-16 11:56:57

There's a dog near my mums who has a visi-vest with I Need Space on it - will have a Google 😊

MadisonAvenue Tue 22-Nov-16 12:06:56

I thought it was just common decency to put your dog on it's lead when approaching another with is on one.

My dog has been attacked on a number of occasions, culprits have been Staffies and Dalmations (strange really but two different Dalamtions have had him). He can be quite wary now so I read his body language and if he's looking nervous he goes on his lead when I see another dog, the amount of "it's okay, he/she's friendly/only wants to play" that I get is ridiculous.

There was one particular fuckwit that I used to see in the Summer, a woman on a bike who had two very large dogs running alongside her (unless they saw another dog and then their attention was diverted). I asked her one day to put them on a lead as they were making my dog very nervous and all she could do was cycle over to me, stop her bike (but not get off) and lean over to grab the collar of one of them as she didn't have a lead with her. According to her no one puts their dogs on leads in these woods. They do actually, I see plenty, but I suppose it suited her argument. She also informed me that you don't even need to have a lead with you! Fancy that, eh?

alleypalley Tue 22-Nov-16 12:07:07

We have a mini schnauzer who is fear aggressive towards people. She was kicked by some twat in the park when she was about 6 months old. We have the yellow nervous harness but I am astounded by the number of people who still try to pet her, she's really cute looking and absolutely fine if people ignore her but the number of people who say it's OK I'm a dog person and then try and pet her, so she then goes nuts barking at them, and it's not just a warning bark you can properly hear the stress and fear in her and they still think they can calm her down and make friends with her. Just fuck off and leave her alone. Sorry rant over.

Madbengalmum Tue 22-Nov-16 12:10:49

As a dog owner i believe ALL dogs should be on lead in a public place. This is for the benefit of runners, kids, those who are scared of dogs, and dogs who have some dog fear. It is just the considerate thing to do.

MiaowTheCat Tue 22-Nov-16 12:12:02

I wouldn't muzzle - it tends to allow the idiot brigade a chance to excuse their own dog's asbo behaviour. I've had it when dogs have attacked my on lead and muzzled (was an ex-racer so muzzled for small furry things) dog and then blamed my dog for wearing a muzzle!

Katy07 Tue 22-Nov-16 12:19:29

Can we not start the whole 'staffies are a problem' thing please. It's irrelevant here (and why the OP had to mention the breeds I don't know)
If your dog was on the lead then she should have called hers back. End of. Yours doesn't need to be muzzled unless you know there's a problem - often dogs are happier off lead when other dogs are too - it's being restricted by the lead that stresses them because they can't get away if annoyed.

mikeyssister Tue 22-Nov-16 12:20:36

I also only let my dog off his lead in a wide open space because while he's very good at returning most of the time he's useless if distracted. (Only 10 months old).

If I see people approaching with or with out dogs I reattach and if a dog approaches on a lead I always ask the owner can we socialise.

I also teach my children to ask before they approach any dog and not to even ask if the dog is working.

A little though goes a long, long way.

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