To be furious the teacher told my ten year old she stinks?

(290 Posts)
madsymads Mon 14-Nov-16 18:14:57

Family meal yesterday at an Indian restaurant. Might have been a bit heavy on garlic and spices.

DD was quiet when I picked her up today (she had been to after school club) and then suddenly started crying. I of course asked what was wrong and she said that this morning she had gone up to her teachers desk to ask something and the teacher (DD demonstrated) pulled a face and said 'ew, go and sit down, get away from me. What have you eaten? It smells awful.'

Obviously this led to quite a lot of unkind comments all day.

Completely inappropriate. Or AIBU?

Katy07 Mon 14-Nov-16 18:18:14

Wow! shock
Completely inappropriate.

Ineededtonamechange Mon 14-Nov-16 18:19:44

Wow. Really? I'd be fuming if teacher actually said that. Not kind, or helpful.

Obviously check with the teacher but I'd be expressing disapproval, just unnecessary!

Ibelieve123 Mon 14-Nov-16 18:19:51

That is awful op. I would be so cross How can a teacher embarrass a young pupil like that.
I would be wanting an explanation & an apology for my dd
Yanbu

madsymads Mon 14-Nov-16 18:20:43

I'll definitely check (I don't leap to my child's defence and I support teachers) but I feel this is the truth.

SemiNormal Mon 14-Nov-16 18:22:48

That's awful, definitely needs questioning the teacher about. Your poor DD.

Bobsmum02 Mon 14-Nov-16 18:22:56

So inappropriate and feeding bullying within the class. I would be fuming!

Bakedappleflavour Mon 14-Nov-16 18:24:34

If that's true it's fucking horrible.

Boiing Mon 14-Nov-16 18:25:19

I woud be livid. Tell the head to teach to teacher some professionalism / suggest teacher has some anti bullying training.

sj257 Mon 14-Nov-16 18:27:02

That's really mean! 😔

peachesandcreamdream Mon 14-Nov-16 18:30:48

Is the teacher normally like this?

If not, I'd suggest a quiet word rather than accusing them of full scale bullying.

That said, it wasn't a nice thing to say.

ps I feel for your daughter - I really carry garlic when I eat anything containing it blush

EweAreHere Mon 14-Nov-16 18:35:52

Any professional teacher would know that this would create problems for a student if s/he made such a statement out loud in front of a class/other students like this.

A quiet word should have been had. I would formally ask her what she said and, if it looks like this did indeed happen, have a word with her head of department.

SapphireStrange Mon 14-Nov-16 18:40:13

(assuming your DD has it right)

Unacceptable.

SuburbanRhonda Mon 14-Nov-16 18:41:34

So she didn't actually say that your child stinks?

She said whatever she's eaten smelled awful.

Both unacceptable of course, but I'm wondering why your title says something that didn't happen.

Jayfee Mon 14-Nov-16 18:45:07

I just spent an hour with a very smelly student. someshong she had eaten I think. but i wouldnt dream of commenting. but to be honest i would try and use it to help your daughter realise how thoughtless some people can be..even teachers. if it happened again i would have a word with the teacher.

madsymads Mon 14-Nov-16 18:46:55

No, sorry Surburban I'm not buying that.

Do you think eleven and ten year olds will see it like that?

mellowfartfulness Mon 14-Nov-16 18:46:58

I think the distinction between "you stink" and "what you've eaten stinks" is subtle enough to make no difference to the poor kid on the receiving end of such comments in front of their whole class.

Olympiathequeen Mon 14-Nov-16 18:47:01

Just have a quiet word with the teacher and explain how upset your DD was. It was very unkind.

Jayfee Mon 14-Nov-16 18:50:06

i just wish all the mums who think teachers should be superhuman had to spend a year teaching. i love teaching and am a good teacher but dont always get everything right. at the moment too many good teachers are leaving teaching and those left need support rather than judgement. of course op is rght in wanting to support her child, but anti bullying training for the teacher..really????

SapphireStrange Mon 14-Nov-16 18:51:50

I'm an adult and the distinction between 'you stink' and 'whatever she's eaten smelled awful' is too subtle for me, to be honest.

They're both very capable of making a person feel crap.

Sara107 Mon 14-Nov-16 18:52:15

Really unkind, and unprofessional. There was no need to mention the smell. I would take it up with the school, as it clearly upset the child.

Cagliostro Mon 14-Nov-16 18:52:31

Really crass comment sad poor DD

Ohdearducks Mon 14-Nov-16 18:52:40

Rude behaviour in any context or situation, there was absolutely no need for that and the fact it lead to your child being picked on throughout the day is awful. I'd be furious if I was you. Definitely approach the teacher and make it very clear how hurt your DD was by her comments and that it lead to hurtful comments from other children. If the teacher is not completely mortified and forthcoming with a sincere apology than go to the parent liaison person and make a complaint about her humilating treatment of your child.

madsymads Mon 14-Nov-16 18:53:20

Jayfee I do not expect you to get everything right, but do not act as if you are the victim here.

The victim is a little girl who did nothing wrong, nothing disrespectful, nothing nasty. She went to talk to her teacher.

RichardBucket Mon 14-Nov-16 18:53:42

Very inappropriate. I work with adults who sometimes smell (BO, bad breath, garlic, whatever), am not "superhuman" and I manage to keep my thoughts to myself. Anyone working with children should be extra careful.

If this teacher didn't realise what she'd done and apologise, she could definitely do with some anti-bullying training.

Jayfee Stop whining.

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