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"Ur doing great hun"

(165 Posts)
girlwithamoonandstaronherhead Mon 14-Nov-16 09:08:19

I'm on a couple of whatsapp groups with people I don't know, due to shared interests. I find them very useful, and the people very nice. But one thing really annoys me. If for example I ask for some advice (one of them is a parenting group), I will get some good advice, plus many fairly pointless messages along the lines of 'ur doing great', 'give urself a pat on the back' etc. These people don't know me, and have never met my kids, so I could quite feasibly not be doing great, and they wouldn't know.
I like genuine compliments, for example if someone in real life said, 'your kids are so well behaved, you're doing really well with them', or on whatsapp, 'your posts are so insightful, thanks' (btw no one has said either of these things to me, I'm just fantasising grin), that would give me a nice warm feeling.
But I really don't feel I need meaningless compliments from people I've never met. I feel this is the way the world is going, everyone needing constant praise from others for not actually doing anything.
AIBU and a miserable cow?

pilates Mon 14-Nov-16 09:11:53


It annoys me to.

Soubriquet Mon 14-Nov-16 09:13:07

It's the Huns

They have a "your bubba, your rules" mantra

Even if you're struggling terribly, they will insist you are doing the job right because it's your bubba.

Anyone who contradicts that will get shot down

Aeroflotgirl Mon 14-Nov-16 09:13:50

The hunning would do my head in. I suppose if you cannot give advice, don't say anything, and allow people who have been in similar positions to help

ChangingNamesAgain Mon 14-Nov-16 09:15:06

It's like fake hugs on forums, yanbu, it's weird and false

prettywhiteguitar Mon 14-Nov-16 09:17:22

Hi Hun ! No matta wat you're doin the right thing.

Basically it's cause if you dare say anything critical or disagree with the Huns it causes a massive argument, they don't do debate. That's why they hate mumsnet, it's too nasty 😂

girlwithamoonandstaronherhead Mon 14-Nov-16 10:20:15

Ha! Glad I'm not alone. And thank God for mumsnet. I'd rather be flamed!

HalfShellHero Mon 14-Nov-16 10:26:01

Constantly hunning grin ...its like stepford wives ...but mums..

HalfShellHero Mon 14-Nov-16 10:27:32

Although........if our society wasnt so damned if you do damned if you dont, towards mothers .....

milkshakeandmonstermunch Mon 14-Nov-16 10:30:57

Slightly off topic as different reasons but I HATE "hun". I'm Glasweigan but living in England now. Hun was a religious slur growing up. I cringe when people "hun" me.

ThinkOfTheMice Mon 14-Nov-16 10:33:07

Ur doin great hun ignore the haters and feed lil Mason and Kyle maccyDs what do those docs know anyway haha. *


Yanbu. Hunning is thankfully rare here and you'll be eviscerated for lol-ing or feeding your six month old fries.
Long live Mumsnet, and all who sail in her.

* actually overheard in ASDA in Edinburgh.

JellyBelli Mon 14-Nov-16 10:33:37

YANBU. I'd prefer to get constructive critism than an empty compliment any day.

CaesiumTime Mon 14-Nov-16 10:35:27

YANBU. Annoying as hell.

Camomila Mon 14-Nov-16 10:38:37

What was it a religious slur for milkshake? (Am nosy!)
All I can think of is Attila the Hun...

This is what I like mumsnet, if I am doing something wrong unknowingly then I like that 10 people will come along and tell me current guidelines and give links to the original research.

FloodMud Mon 14-Nov-16 10:40:31

Oh it happens on Mumsnet too. Lol. Hun.

ThinkOfTheMice Mon 14-Nov-16 10:43:41

Ur annoys me too.
Ur was an ancient Sumerian city-state in Mesopotamia.

Hun = the equivalent of fenian basically. Sectarian slur for protestants. Not a good thing to say.

APlaceOnTheCouch Mon 14-Nov-16 10:49:09

I love any kind of praise or positive affirmation so it wouldn't bother me in the slightest that the praise was unfounded grin but the spelling and use of 'hun' would irritate me.

singleandfabulous Mon 14-Nov-16 10:52:53

Ah yes. The 'hun' brigade.

I find it a really good way of identifying people I wouldn't get along with so leave them to it.

Same with Facebook etc..

My doctor's receptionist calls me 'hun.' Boils my piss.

FairNotFair Mon 14-Nov-16 10:53:34

I'm on a couple of closed FB groups for collectors of a particular item. Many of the messages are like this xxxx with lots of kisses xxxx instead of punctuation xxxx after every phrase xxxx hunni xxxx LOL xxxx

And I wonder, therefore, whether the omission of "xxxx" from my own (rare) posts is construed as a mortal insult. And, if that's what de rigueur for messages to complete strangers, how does one show actual affection to people one really loves?

NavyandWhite Mon 14-Nov-16 10:55:15

Hun mentality. Different to mine and annoying yes.

WorraLiberty Mon 14-Nov-16 10:56:00


It happens a lot of Mumsnet too when someone says they're unhappy with their looks/weight/hair.

"I'm sure you look gorgeous"

"I'm sure you look stunning"

How the actual fuck would anyone know? confused

milkshakeandmonstermunch Mon 14-Nov-16 10:56:22

camomila it's a slur for a protestant. We'd get bricks chucked at our school bus by kids from the Catholic school and told we were filthy huns (and I don't doubt that kids from our school did the same to them - both as bad as each other). It was really just a way for the Rangers-Celtic divide to spill over into school time. Lovely memories!

ItShouldHaveBeenJingleJess Mon 14-Nov-16 10:56:41

Stepford Mums grin.

I'm off to set up, MN!

NavyandWhite Mon 14-Nov-16 10:58:27

I think posters who say that are just edging their bets Worra. As if they say anything different someone will come along and kick off grin does wind me up though.

Soubriquet Mon 14-Nov-16 11:00:36

I also hate how long you have to spend deciphering what they have said

"Omg Hun! Ignor those h8ers. They jus jelus cos u a fab mummy"

It isn't illiteracy in most cases. It's pure laziness

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