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To find "busy" people irritating?

(229 Posts)
Spacereindeer Sun 13-Nov-16 21:24:51

I understand that modern life is very busy, with many parents (and those without children!) having a huge amount to juggle, but a lot of people seem to get a buzz from telling people how booked up and busy they are. People are almost embarrassed to admit that they are available when trying to organise a night out.

Is it just me who thinks this or do some people really have a social engagement every night?

QueenMortificado Sun 13-Nov-16 21:27:23

I sometimes say I'm busy 3 nights in a row because I'm busy 2 of those and then want a night off. Although I often don't mind missing out on plans anyway

It's worse when people tell you how busy they are. Ie a friend of mine ALWAYS writes in a message or email "just a quick one from me as I'm so busy". Literally don't care.

MaddyHatter Sun 13-Nov-16 21:30:00

its honestly not something i can find the energy to be bothered about... unless its someone who insists you MUST get together, yet can never be arsed to book you a slot in their terribly busy schedule.. or if they DO.. invariably end up fucking you off for a better offer.

now THAT shit irritates me.. its a swift way to me making sure i'm 'busy' next time they ask.

Rollonbedtime7pm Sun 13-Nov-16 21:30:05

YANBU - especially the way it gets used as an excuse to be crap and flakey! "Oh sorry I didn't reply to your text, just soo busy..."

Well I have 3 kids, one is a baby and I can manage to text you and I am hardly spending my time sat on my arse am I?! hmm

KingJoffreysRestingCuntface Sun 13-Nov-16 21:30:31


I haven't been busy in years. Quite like it that way.

Greenandmighty Sun 13-Nov-16 21:35:10

Yes, spacereindeer, I know exactly what you mean! People are competitively busy these days, it's almost a badge of honour to demonstrate how needed they are. It's also designed to make them appear popular and as if they can't admit to having time on their hands. Really irritating....

TowerRavenSeven Sun 13-Nov-16 21:36:46


gunting Sun 13-Nov-16 21:39:27

Yeah it gets on my nerves too. I read some study found that people who say they are busy are more narcissistic and I think it's made me find them even more annoying.

Spacereindeer Sun 13-Nov-16 21:40:34

Thank you!

Maddyhatter - I know I shouldn't let it concern me, but it seems the group of people seem to be the same ones who deem themselves too busy to socialise with some others in an antenatal group I joined. I know everyone won't always like everyone, it just feels a bit mean and a bit superior.

overthehillandroundthemountain Sun 13-Nov-16 21:40:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DameDiazepamTheDramaQueen Sun 13-Nov-16 21:41:00

'Busy' people tend not to listen ime just talk... a lot!hmm

overthehillandroundthemountain Sun 13-Nov-16 21:41:46

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

60sname Sun 13-Nov-16 21:42:02

Would you prefer they said they weren't keen to spend time together?

dudsville Sun 13-Nov-16 21:42:57

I used to be busy. It was due to my oh at the time booking up all the time. I think he was anxious about not keeping up with setting friends and going to events. Since that ended I have been wonderfully un-busy.

Hawaiiisalongwayaway Sun 13-Nov-16 21:43:44

Yes competitive busyness is definitely a 'thing' isn't it and very annoying at that.

nancy75 Sun 13-Nov-16 21:43:44

It always makes me laugh, none of the people that tell me how busy they are even go to work, i wonder how they do t feel daft saying it in front of me and other friends that go to work and still look after the kids!

Toddlerteaplease Sun 13-Nov-16 21:44:19

I have an oversharer friend on FB who always complains she's so busy. She lists every single household chore she has to do that day. Then posts again to say she's done it. Seriously, I couldn't care less that you've had a pot of coffee and done the ironing! Get a life!

overthehillandroundthemountain Sun 13-Nov-16 21:45:02

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Spacereindeer Sun 13-Nov-16 21:45:10

60s name - no, I'm just more of a "come one come all" kind of person. I personally haven't been excluded, but I would rather others weren't either. Perhaps unrealistic.

MarciaBlaine Sun 13-Nov-16 21:48:23

I'm busy because I have a lot of work that doesn't necessarily stop at 5pm and at weekends I am exhausted and have to prioritise my family. This does't make me competitively busy but week nights are pretty much written off and weekends have to be organised in advance. I hate it but it is what it is.

notagiraffe Sun 13-Nov-16 21:48:46

Christmas is so busy though. Not all glam stuff. By the time you've done one works' dinner and two class mums' drinks and the school carol concert and the show you booked way in September because you thought it would be fun to see something in the run up to Christmas (--WHY?--) five nights in a row, you get desperate for some quiet time, even if it's actually closer friends who are inviting.
The rest of the year has acres of free time.

J0kersSmile Sun 13-Nov-16 21:50:56

I'm a busy person, I don't really care that you find me annoying though.

Sp/Lp to two dc
3 jobs, one which I'm the manager, another that requires working outside the set hours
A college course
Martial arts hobby that requires quite a bit of dedication and practice at home.

When I say I'm busy it's not to show how important I am, it's to explain how I'm just too busy to sort shit out with friends and family atm and I'm not forgetting them I just have to put my dc first in the majority of spare time I have. I'm also dating, that's really hard as I'm usually tired from being so busy to hold even a text conversation on any weekday evening.

Spacereindeer Sun 13-Nov-16 21:50:56

Marcia - I get that completely - I'm more on about those who claim to have a social engagement 365 days of the year. I can't imagine possible imagine wanting that, or bragging about it if it was the case.

Spudlet Sun 13-Nov-16 21:51:52

I tend to get busy in spates. I can be totally non-busy for weeks and then I will have two or three things pop up all at once so I end up looking highly busy when actually I'm not at all! 'Tis most annoying.

FinderofNeedles Sun 13-Nov-16 21:52:10

By the time you've done one works' dinner and two class mums' drinks and the school carol concert and the show you booked way in September

Stealth boast.

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