My MIL had breast cancer and was treated a few years ago. This weekend we found out it had returned. Prognosis not known as yet but we presume treatment will start asap.
It was our turn to go to them for Christmas, with our two DDs. Obviously she will be in no shape to host the family this year so I immediately said we would have them to us.
Every year my BIL and SIL, with their teenage daughter, go to SIL's mum's on Christmas Day. Every single year, without fail. My inlaws say that it's not really a problem, but DH and I know that it's a sore point.
So, what with MIL having cancer and everything, I suggested they come to us for Christmas lunch. It would mean so much to MIL to have both sons and all three grandchildren together for Christmas. I've had a text this morning saying "we won't be coming for christmas because I have my granddad to look after".
She has her mother, two sisters and their families…her grandad is elderly, yes, and I understand that. My own grandmother is 94 and very frail. This may be her last Christmas. I've spoken to my mum about it and we have come to an arrangement. However, I think that for her to turn down lunch with us using the excuse of her grandad is extremely unfair on DH's mum.
They could come here for lunch and leave about 3pm (they're about 40 mins away from us) and still be back at home or her mother's by 4pm. Plenty of time left to be with her family.
I've told DH that he and his brother need to have a discussion about it. I'm not going to get into a text argument with her about it. I am doing this for MIL not any other reason. Being brutally honest, she's nice enough but she and the surly teenager are not easy company.
I don't want to create a family row over this, and that's the last think MIL and FIL would want, but I think her attitude stinks, and BIL also needs to assert himself in this situation and stand up to her.
So, AIBU‽ Thanks
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
AIBU to expect my BIL and SIL to join us for Christmas?
63 replies
Helliecopter · 12/11/2016 10:00
OP posts:
Coconutty ·
12/11/2016 10:15
This reply has been deleted
Message withdrawn at poster's request.
Don’t want to miss threads like this?
Weekly
Sign up to our weekly round up and get all the best threads sent straight to your inbox!
Log in to update your newsletter preferences.
You've subscribed!
Please create an account
To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.