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Facebook: People saying "happy birthday" to other people's kids

(95 Posts)
thebloodycat Tue 08-Nov-16 14:48:27

Just a small rant.

I often see a parent post a photo (old or new) saying something like "happy birthday to our darling baby girl, can't believe you're 5 already" blah blah blah, vomit. What I then find even more odd and annoying is then 500 of their friends will start saying "happy birthday xxx".

What's the bloody point? The kid isn't on Facebook!!?

Or am I being mean??

dementedpixie Tue 08-Nov-16 14:49:08

Yes you are

thebloodycat Tue 08-Nov-16 14:49:31

Why?

TheSparrowhawk Tue 08-Nov-16 14:50:58

Wow what a misery you are.

Buddahbelly Tue 08-Nov-16 14:51:10

No your not, I find it weird too, although I find it weird when the parent posts happy birthday to my darling whatever... Is this 3 year old on facebook to see it? Can they read it?

Just get off social media and say happy birthday to one another!

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe Tue 08-Nov-16 14:51:37

It's nice to be nice. I can think of thousands of things to get annoyed at about fb, people acknowledging a child's birthday isn't one of them.

SpuriouserAndSpuriouser Tue 08-Nov-16 14:52:16

I dislike most facebooky things, but surely that is fairly innocuous?

BingBongBingBong Tue 08-Nov-16 14:52:58

I think it's cute.

thebloodycat Tue 08-Nov-16 14:53:04

I'm not a misery at all and I love birthdays. To me it's like sending a text to the wrong number. The kid will never see it! If the friends were that bothered they'd send a card or say it face to face, wouldn't they?

Buddahbelly, I agree just as odd really. What's the point?

NerrSnerr Tue 08-Nov-16 14:54:19

I agree. When I see 'Happy first birthday Evie. Mummy and daddy love you lots' etc on FB if makes me cringe. Why not tell Evie to her face as I am quite sure she can't read.

AnchorDownDeepBreath Tue 08-Nov-16 14:54:49

I think people texting parents to say happy birthday to their children has happened for a long time, and Facebook just makes it easier. Keeps it all together.

For all of Facebook's ills, I really can't get upset about that one. Children tend to be significant to their parents, I make sure I congratulate my friends' children on their birthdays the same as I'd congratulate friends on promotions/new houses/whatever other life news they have.

Excited101 Tue 08-Nov-16 14:56:29

I think it's quite weird. If you want to wish the child happy birthday then send them a card, at least they can enjoy the picture then!

I've got someone who FB memories of her children constantly. So alongside the current pics which I don't mind too much as it's nice to see what they get up to, we also have the pictures from 1/2/3/4 years ago as well!

thebloodycat Tue 08-Nov-16 14:57:15

NerrSnerr haha. It's one thing saying it to an adult that's not on facebook (at least someone could show them) but saying to a baby/child that's not on there and can't even read!!!

ElsaAintAsColdAsMe, I agree it is nice to be nice.

FoxesOnSocks Tue 08-Nov-16 14:57:30

Unlike text to wrong number the Facebook account holder knows the person being wishd a happy birthday. They may very well pass on said greetings.

In an reverse analogy, if a person wrote something negative about a child on a Facebook page would it be still not nice even though it's not the child's Facebook page so they won't see it?

Arfarfanarf Tue 08-Nov-16 14:57:58

Attention.
Sharing.
It's just how people do it.
Trying to make sense of it by comparing with pre social media life isnt going to work.
The 'point ' of it, insofar as there is one, is just that this is how people interact through the medium of social media.
You get pics of meals, statements to their partner that they're seated next to 😂, and my personal favourite - the vaguebook.

I am reminded of that episode of black mirror where life is all about your social media ranking.

AnchorDownDeepBreath Tue 08-Nov-16 14:58:01

The kid will never see it! If the friends were that bothered they'd send a card or say it face to face, wouldn't they?

Crossposts, but I know plenty of parents who show their children things on Facebook, and would show them the post and responses. Plus, not everyone will send a card or see the child - acquaintances might just want to send regards easily, the same way they would have sent a text. And the child might be at school/with the other parent/otherwise engaged on their actual birthday, or the friend could be working or busy, and a Facebook message is a quick and easy way of showing that you remembered.

Maybe it's generational.

thebloodycat Tue 08-Nov-16 14:59:25

I suppose you could pass on a greeting to a 5 year old but surely not a baby??

I don't really think that is a reverse analogy as the parents wouldn't be prompting it, as they are with a photo saying "happy birthday xx"

A7mint Tue 08-Nov-16 14:59:44

God! People on MN are so literal!

HappyCamel Tue 08-Nov-16 15:01:07

Children do get to hear it. Either reading it themselves or having the message read to them.

It's especially good when you're in a different country to lots of friends and family. We get a few paper cards but lots of messages and the kids like to hear the message and see a photo of the person who sent it so they remember who they are

thebloodycat Tue 08-Nov-16 15:01:24

Plus, not everyone will send a card If you can't be bothered or don't know them well enough to send a card, what's the point at all???

Don't get me started on vaguebook!!!

thebloodycat Tue 08-Nov-16 15:03:13

To be honest my gut feeling it, it's another of those hidden messages that says "look how many friends I have".

Or if it's a picture of the kid in-front of loads of presents its "look how much money we have spent!"

TheSparrowhawk Tue 08-Nov-16 15:04:08

It is friendly and kind to acknowledge an important day in someone's life, and for parents their child's birthday is an important day. Wishing the child happy birthday is a way of being kind and friendly. Hardly something to be annoyed about.

Vaguebooking is manipulative, which is why it annoys people.

katiegg Tue 08-Nov-16 15:04:46

I find it really bizzare too. I have a family member whose three children have celebrated birthdays in the past 5 weeks or so. Each one has got a pos, complete with photos, gushing about how they are so proud of their lovely, caring, smart, kind, funny son/daughter. Every family member and close friend is tagged in the post and ppl start wishing the birthday child a happy birthday in the comments below. I find it so bizzare, esp since the oldest two have their own Facebook accounts.

TheSparrowhawk Tue 08-Nov-16 15:04:53

To be honest my gut feeling it, it's another of those hidden messages that says "look how many friends I have".

Or if it's a picture of the kid in-front of loads of presents its "look how much money we have spent!"

Ah, so you're jealous.

SoupDragon Tue 08-Nov-16 15:06:04

I suppose you could pass on a greeting to a 5 year old but surely not a baby??

I'm guessing you never bothered to celebrate your child(ren)’s bpfirst birthdays etc then.

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