A thread about a thread... Lundy Bancroft

(8 Posts)
ferriswheel Fri 04-Nov-16 20:59:27

I have posted a thread about life as a single Mum already on aibu.

There has already been excellent advice but again I've come across a recommendation to read Lundy Bancroft books.

I just can't. I'm too tired. I have three children aged three and under, and am living with my (hopefully) stbxh.

Can anyone help me by sharing the wisdom and courage that Bancroft gave them?

tia

ferriswheel Fri 04-Nov-16 22:30:34

Really no one? I thought there'd be heaps of you

stella23 Fri 04-Nov-16 22:44:48

I struggled to read it, I just didn't have the time and the brain space, the bit I read was about didn't types
Of abusers and the and the ways they abused.
I suppose so you could recognise it with the home.

TheVeryHungryDieter Fri 04-Nov-16 22:46:22

In a nutshell the book is called Why Does He Do That? And the answer is "Because He's a Twat, That's Just The Way Of It, And You Should Ditch Him And Find Someone Who's Not a Twat".

Basically there are many different types of abusers, they don't change, and you're barking up the wrong tree if you keep on treating them as you would any other normal decent person and expecting them to respond as a normal decent person. But you won't know this, because they'll have you convinced that you're the problem, not them.

That's my take on it anyway.

M0stlyHet Fri 04-Nov-16 22:47:04

There's a summary on this thread. Hopefully it'll give you the gist.

pictish Fri 04-Nov-16 22:47:47

Good summary.

ferriswheel Fri 04-Nov-16 22:49:37

Thank you Mostly.

Thank you also Very. That summary was excellent and really cheered me up.

pictish Fri 04-Nov-16 22:50:49

That was to Hungry.

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