To think there's nothing unusual about my six month old not sleeping through

(93 Posts)
5minutestobed Wed 02-Nov-16 12:36:31

I'm fed up of people asking when I'm going to do CIO/CC because my six month old doesn't sleep through. AIBU to think it's totally normal for a six month old to wake in the night and still have night feeds etc?
Several friends with similar age babies keep talking about how they will have to sleep train soon as there is no way they can carry on with waking in the night. Surely most people don't have a baby and think it will sleep through so soon?
I realise some people are lucky and have babies who sleep through from early on but I doubt that most babies sleep through by six months?

JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff Wed 02-Nov-16 12:39:48

Based on the totally unscientific evidence of me and my baby group friends, I would say all but one of us had babies sleeping through by 6 mos. And that child, imo, has some type of underlying issue as she has apparently never slept for more than 90 mins at a time.

However, that doesn't mean you should do something you're uncomfortable with. If you are confident your child is getting enough sleep in the round, and you are not yourself going mad, then whatever works!

The only time I do judge people is when their babies are clearly strung out through lack of sleep and they refuse to sleep train on principle. Sleep at this period is SO important for growth and development.

MyschoolMyrules Wed 02-Nov-16 12:42:12

I completely agree with you. I have older children but was invited to a friend's house and most women there had children under the age of 1 and I was quite surprised at how many were having sleep consultants, or considering it. Or doing some form of sleep training. It is completely normal for a 6 month old not to sleep through the night and many, many mums must feel that they are doing something wrong. I do know parents whose babies have been sleeping through from age 2 months old, which is great, but my DS1 didn't sleep through before 18 months, which is also normal. 6 months is very young still, and I think it's because of those stupid parenting books who set expectations in the wrong place.

ditzychick34 Wed 02-Nov-16 12:42:28

My group of 5 friends only has one baby sleeping through now, ages from 5mo to 10mo.

ditzychick34 Wed 02-Nov-16 12:44:02

Are you happy with your sleeping patterns? If yes then just keep going, your doing great, things will change when they change

crayfish Wed 02-Nov-16 12:47:03

Most of my friends in my 'mum' group did have babies that were pretty much sleeping through at 6 months. Saying that, they were almost universally bottle fed and based on my (massively anecdotal) experience, it seems to me that bottle fed babies to tend to sleep 'better'.

There is huge variation though, even in the same baby. My DS was reliably sleeping through at about 12 weeks (7pm to 7am) but it all went to pot at about 10 months and now he wakes up fairly regularly.

Wrinklytights Wed 02-Nov-16 12:47:16

Yanbu. Only 1 of my 5 babies slept through at 6m. Totally normal. Also fine to want to sleep train if that's what your friends need to do - some people manage better on broken sleep than others, but not OK to feel pressured.

Farmmummy Wed 02-Nov-16 12:47:23

Probably going to get flamed (too tired to care!) my 20 month old dd2 doesn't sleep through. Also before I'm told how I should parent dd1 slept through from 12 weeks 😭😭😭

crayfish Wed 02-Nov-16 12:54:18

Sorry I meant to say, I thought a six month old would be too young for sleep training. Me and my friends mainly got sleeping babies but it was luck, pure luck.

Maccapacca88 Wed 02-Nov-16 12:57:23

Nobody in my baby group had a baby that slept through at 6 months. We all breast fed in that particular group. My baby didn't sleep through until she started walking.

Tallzara Wed 02-Nov-16 12:59:31

Nothing unusual but I'd probably be trying to cut out the night feeds by 6 months.

My baby no2 didn't sleep through until 10 months but was waking up for comfort rather than a feed.

AnnetteKertan Wed 02-Nov-16 12:59:33

Similar to crayfish , it was only 'mum' friends who were formula/combination at 6 months who had babies sleeping through. I was ebf.

At 6 months I talked a lot about intending to sleep train, and I always meant it, however when it came to the date I had set (e.g at 8 months) I changed my mind as she seemed too young. In the end she slept through the day after I stopped breastfeeding following three weeks of DP getting up at night with her in an attempt to night wean (by that point I was really ready to get some decent sleep and actually dd has been much happier since she's been sleeping through!)

AnnetteKertan Wed 02-Nov-16 13:00:24

I stopped breastfeeding at 12.5 months btw

KondosSecretJunkRoom Wed 02-Nov-16 13:01:43

Three children here, not one slept through at 6 months. Where's that site that explains the biology behind a baby's sleep and why it's usual, preferable even, that they wake in the night? I'll have a look...

SquedgieBeckenheim Wed 02-Nov-16 13:01:43

My DD didn't sleep through regularly till she was over 1, can't remember exactly when. She had the odd 1 night of sleeping through before then, but nothing reliable. I think society expects babies to sleep better than nature intends these days as lives are busier!

Unicorn1981 Wed 02-Nov-16 13:02:52

My baby slept through from about six weeks but would cluster feed for hours beforehand. And used to go down quite late around 10pm once she'd fed enough. From the conversations I had with other parents I think I was pretty much alone.

Ilovenannyplum Wed 02-Nov-16 13:04:17

Nope, nothing wrong with it.
My DS didn't sleep through until he was 1. Even now at 2.4 we get the occasional wake up from him.

People that say their baby slept through from birth followed by lots of patronising advice used to make me want to scream

FlapsTie Wed 02-Nov-16 13:06:23

My five year old still doesn't sleep through...

5minutestobed Wed 02-Nov-16 13:08:02

Both my children are/were FF, DS1 didn't consistently sleep through until he was 2 and even then he still wakes up sometimes.

I think its more the assumption that you must do something to fix your baby if they are not sleeping through that annoys me. It puts so much pressure on parents to make them feel they are doing something wrong or that there is something wrong with their baby, when actually its completely normal and ok.

DragonboysMum Wed 02-Nov-16 13:08:44

6mo here definitely not sleeping through! Nor did my last, he was about a year before he did a full night.
Both bf.

maddiemookins16mum Wed 02-Nov-16 13:10:02

6 months is young to sleep through (define what you consider sleeping through though??). DD never slept through (I considered 8pm- 6am as sleeping through) until she was nearly a year. I stopped a middle of the night feed at 10 months but she often woke (because she lost her dummy 😳) and just needed resettled and sometimes a drink of water.

SheepyFun Wed 02-Nov-16 13:11:57

DD still doesn't sleep through, and speaking to other parents of similar aged children, we're far from alone. She's nearly 4 years (not months!) old. If your mental health etc. is holding together, there's no need to force anything at 6 months!

Dontpanicpyke Wed 02-Nov-16 13:13:22

Interesting about the breast feeding. My 4 were bf for between 6 months first 2 and 16 months last 2 and none slept through until they started to wean and FF.

CC saved my sanity.

Still op Take no notice and do what suits you.

Enidblyton1 Wed 02-Nov-16 13:13:54

YANBU.
It would be interesting to know the true stats - would love to know what % of babies sleep through by 6 months. Of course the definition of 'sleep through' varies depending on who you talk to.
My DC were treated exactly the same, but one started sleeping through 6 months earlier than the other.

Caper86 Wed 02-Nov-16 13:28:12

Read an interesting article the other day on how strict routines (they were digging at GF) have led to the idea of a mythical 'good baby' who sleeps all through the night and is predictable, when in fact most babies don't sleep through and do cry. Some of my friends have 3 YO who don't sleep through, it's fine and all babies are different

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