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AIBU?

To still be upset and think no they shouldn't get away with this?

27 replies

Ivechangedmyname1 · 28/10/2016 18:17

I'm very into crafts and also have a daughter with additional needs.

Today there was a party hosted by a charity which I'm quite involved in and today I provided sensory bottles for the children to make, they could then take them home etc. There were lots of beads, buttons, bottles, ribbons, rice, sequins etc so much stuff there was plenty to go round with stuff to spare.

I was sitting at the large table with my dd and my friends dd (who is 9) was a few spaces away from me. There were also two women who come to events quite often in holidays but who I don't socialise with outside of events.

Friends dd had spent a good hour making a sensory bottle and was quite happy and content, her dm was with her db in the quiet room so she was alone but were all friends so she was safe etc and having fun.

Anyway the two women draw my attention because they are tutting, laughing and loud whispering. The dd was saying no and then when I noticed properly what was going on she got up to another table and started crying. I asked what was going on and one of the women said the dd was being selfish, not sharing.

I left my dd with another mum and went to the little girl and said don't worry and took her to her mum.

The other two mums came over to me and said 'is she ready to share now' I just Hmm and said no because she had made it and that was the point of me bringing things in, for the kids to make their own. The mothers knew this FYI as well.

The dd was ok and I told my friend what happened but I'm so angry at the two women. You don't essentially pick on a 9 yr old who is getting upset and is alone. Wtf was wrong with them.

I'm angry and don't know what to do but I don't think they should get away with the behaviour but I also don't know what should be done.

Tell me to get over it, just pissed it happened tbh.

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ChuckBiscuits · 28/10/2016 18:20

What was going on?

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PotatoesareDashNice · 28/10/2016 18:21

What a couple of unpleasant bitches.

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Ivechangedmyname1 · 28/10/2016 18:22

Thank you potatoes, that's exactly what I wanted to say, fucking bitches. It was very high school bitchy

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ShotgunNotDoingThePans · 28/10/2016 18:24

I don't understand what they were doing - wre they trying to take the bottle she'd made from her? Why would they do that?

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Amelie10 · 28/10/2016 18:24

Yanbu, awful those big donkeys were picking on a small child.

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Ivechangedmyname1 · 28/10/2016 18:27

Yes they wanted her to open her sensory bottle and remove beads she had put in, granted she had used a lot of one type BUT thatstough, it was all laid out and she liked those beads, there were tons of other types so they should of sucked it up.

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CoraPirbright · 28/10/2016 18:30

What ghastly bullies. You say they often come to events - I would make enquiries, etablish their identities & then approach the powers that be to get them barred.

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MumOnTheRunCatchingUp · 28/10/2016 18:33

so she had taken all of one type and left others without?

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missingmumxox · 28/10/2016 18:34

They sound a bit odd, I have made these in a sn group and it pretty par for the course that some children are going to "like" something so much they use too many, gentle encouragement to share is fine, but if they won't, you move on, you will achieve nothing, but once they are in the bottle, get a grip they are hers, never mind the fact they where yours to start with, which might be another area in which she may of struggled with the idea of sharing

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Ivechangedmyname1 · 28/10/2016 18:35

No she had taken about 1/5th of that type of bead but that's not the point when she had used them it was near the end and actually others had taken more. They weren't even the prettiest beads but she had left enough for someone else to make a bottle with enough of those beads.

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Pancakeflipper · 28/10/2016 18:37

Bizarre behaviour - it can only be explained if the beads they were wanting out of her sensory bottle were made of gold or chocolate.

Don't let it get to you - be content in that you were there for the young girl and the witches didn't get the beads

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Ivechangedmyname1 · 28/10/2016 18:37

She had been at the table for ages before the two women came over.

A good 45 mins, she was choosing carefully had decorated the outside and really put effort into it, the two women didn't even have their dc with them!

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PotatoesareDashNice · 28/10/2016 18:38

Did they know she cried ?

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Ivechangedmyname1 · 28/10/2016 18:41

Yes they did because the laughed and then watched me walk her to her mum, then asked is she ready to share so pretty hard to of missed.

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Pancakeflipper · 28/10/2016 18:44

For the next event you could have the children making voodoo dolls of the 2 women?

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Mummyoflittledragon · 28/10/2016 18:44

What weird, strange and horrible behaviour. Poor little girl. Well done for stepping in. I am baffled. Well now you know what they're like so you can protect the children in your group.

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ColdTeaAgain · 28/10/2016 18:57

So nasty, how awful that they spoilt something she was really enjoying bless her. Not sure what you can do other than keep a very close eye on them at future events, and maybe spread the word a bit as if you have people there you get on well with. Hopefully they don't make a habit of spoiling small children's fun. Twats.

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DearMrDilkington · 28/10/2016 18:57

What horrid woman. I'd actually complain about them to whoever is in charge of running these events. You handled the situation perfectly.

I'm gobsmacked that they didn't even have a child with them while they were trying to get beads off her. Makes it even worse.

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WeArePregnant11 · 28/10/2016 19:05

Poor girl.:(

Simply horrible women.

What about asking them: "are you 2 ready to stop laughing behind a child's back or do you want to continue being nasty hags?"

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PotatoesareDashNice · 28/10/2016 19:06

I'd be telling all the other crafty parents exactly what little shits they were. Just astounding.

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Beardsareweird · 28/10/2016 19:22

You sound like a really lovely person and those two crones deserve a bloody good slap.

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StillStayingClassySanDiego · 28/10/2016 19:33

These two women were without their own children?

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Ivechangedmyname1 · 28/10/2016 19:34

Their kids were else where playing.

What would I say without sounding like a bitch?

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ShotgunNotDoingThePans · 28/10/2016 21:19

Why were they wanting to make bottles anyway? Surely it was a craft activity? Is there a 'leader' or organiser you could speak to, maybe ask them to make a general request about acceptable behaviour? Even draw up a code you could refer to should a similar thing happen again?
The above sound more like strategies for dealing with primary school children - but maybe that's the level at which it meeds to be pitched!

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JellyBelli · 28/10/2016 21:21

They were bullying a child that wasnt theirs, I dont think you have to worry about sounding bitchy.

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