To be feeling overwhelmed

(59 Posts)
pumpkinpiesforsupper Sun 23-Oct-16 19:34:12

I am heavily pregnant, I also have a 1,3 and 4 year old and I just can't keep a show house at all times, I'm so exhausted everyday from this and now I'm at breaking point. Now I'm on ML
I just want to be able to have a PJ day or not have to run around the house cleaning up every toy and hoovering after breakfast lunch and supper. But my landlord just turns up with no notice to do things around the house, I've called my estate agents and they've done nothing to stop it and I just feel so depressed and exhausted at keeping this up.

I was bathing my 1 year old on Friday morning so couldn't leave him to answer the door and when the LL came back he made jokes about me having something to hide. Ahhh I just want to cry

I've never been an anxious person but I'm

Trifleorbust Sun 23-Oct-16 19:38:13

Come on, OP! You must know your rights here, yes? You need to tell your LL that you are entitled to quiet enjoyment of your property and he is not entitled to turn up with no notice. Turn him away.

pumpkinpiesforsupper Sun 23-Oct-16 19:41:05

I have tried but he is SO pushy.
Even the estate agents won't tell him, he's too powerful.

Trifleorbust Sun 23-Oct-16 19:43:44

Have you answered the door and said, "This is not a good time. Could you arrange a time through the estate agent, please"?

He is taking the piss because you let him.

That said, you sound overwhelmed. What support do you have around? Is there someone who can be there more regularly and support you in standing your ground?

Can you move out?

RandomMess Sun 23-Oct-16 19:45:31

Can't you change the locks? I thought you could so long as you change them back when you leave...

WordGetsAround Sun 23-Oct-16 19:45:56

Having 3 children so close together was always going to be really hard work. Hope it gets easier soon.

pumpkinpiesforsupper Sun 23-Oct-16 19:46:11

I've only got my DH really, and he works all day.

I can cope perfectly but since this turning up has started I just can't relax and it's wearing me down. I think because the first few times I let it go over my head I've created a situation that now he thinks it's ok when it's not.

Homebird90 Sun 23-Oct-16 19:46:46

Send a neutral but assertive letter stating that he must give the required amount of notice otherwise you'll be giving him notice to quit the tenancy.

pumpkinpiesforsupper Sun 23-Oct-16 19:47:47

To be honest, having them close together isn't the problem. It's just the fact that we can't just get on with things, and I can't enjoy all the messy play and fun things without worrying about the house.

I'm lucky because they really are good as gold, everyday me and DH chat about how wonderful they are every evening. Sounds silly I know but we just love having them close together.

hotdiggedy Sun 23-Oct-16 19:48:21

What on earth is he wanting to do in the house? Very strange.

pumpkinpiesforsupper Sun 23-Oct-16 19:48:24

It's a beautiful house at a fantastic price. We'd be pushed to find anything else like this under 2.5k

Homebird90 Sun 23-Oct-16 19:49:03

In addition - cnd can you see who's at the door before opening it? Don't open it. Even if he knocks and knocks. He'll get the message.

TheCatsMother99 Sun 23-Oct-16 19:49:27

Agree with Random. You might be permitted to change locks whilst you're resident. Ultimately though, your LL is NOT permitted to turn up and gain entry without reasonable notice, which if say is a minimum of 24 hours.

I'm actually outraged on your behalf, it is not on. Imagine if you were naked (for whatever reason) and he get himself in?!!

pumpkinpiesforsupper Sun 23-Oct-16 19:49:55

Last time I did that, I stupidly forgot to shut the kitchen window so he came through there.

If I leave the door unlocked he just opens it.

pumpkinpiesforsupper Sun 23-Oct-16 19:52:15

I woke up from a nightmare of him last night stood by the bed calling my name 😬😳

Homebird90 Sun 23-Oct-16 19:54:10

He came through the window???!! Not on at all, and you'd be within your rights to report him to the police for that! Do you have a contract? Most say the LL has to give 24 or 48 hours notice, and you have a right to quiet enjoyment of YOUR home.

redexpat Sun 23-Oct-16 19:54:13

Advice on MN for dealing with bad landlords is to ring shelter. I think LLs are supposed to give 24 hours notice (but not sure on that). If someone walks into your home without permission I would tell them to get out or I would call the police.

redexpat Sun 23-Oct-16 19:55:03

I think she dreamed that he was by her bed, not that he actually was.

pumpkinpiesforsupper Sun 23-Oct-16 19:55:11

He calls it his home.
Just feel so stuck because the estate agents don't care so how else can I solve it.

Homebird90 Sun 23-Oct-16 19:55:22

Not on at all. No wonder you're at breaking point. It's harassment.

Trifleorbust Sun 23-Oct-16 19:56:41

I'm sorry, he climbed through the window?

OP, this is bullying and illegal entry to your home. Your DH needs to support you and you need to inform your LL that you will be taking legal action if he does that again. In no uncertain terms, tell him he needs to give you the required notice before he comes onto the property. At all.

Homebird90 Sun 23-Oct-16 19:58:03

Whilst you're there you have every legal right to enjoy it in peace and not have people climbing through your windows and coming in whenever. Do you pay your rent to the estate agent or him?

Trifleorbust Sun 23-Oct-16 19:59:07

You don't need to give a shit what he calls it. You pay him rent. It is your home. He has no right to enter through a window and he has to give notice to enter. You should not be unreasonable in granting him access but you are not obliged to let him in every time he asks for non-essential maintenance. You need to start standing up for yourself.

AuntMabel Sun 23-Oct-16 20:00:15

Has this just started since you've been on ML OP? What are LL's reasons to he keep coming over, and is it ever when your H is home?

TheCatsMother99 Sun 23-Oct-16 20:01:29

What works does he keep coming over to do? Are they things that need doing or are they excuses to unlawfully enter your home?

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