DS(7) and I live in a rural village, I have lived here all my life as has DS. My parents and siblings all live here and DS has a good group of friends at the very small but excellent local primary. There are a few afterschool clubs which run on random days of the week until 4pm but otherwise I rely entirely on my parents for childcare and have to travel over an hour to uni for study/ work placement. There are hardly any jobs in the area and those that come up are not suitable logistically/ are not the type of work I want to end up stuck in as there would be very limited opportunity for progression and I don't want to do the type of work that generally comes up.
I have decided to move in with my boyfriend, he lives in the town my uni is in. I have found DS an excellent but much larger school (provided placing request is granted). I will be too far away for my parents to help with childcare but this school has breakfast club and afterschool club until 6pm as well as holiday clubs. I should be able to find part time work in this town around studying as well as being close to uni- meaning I will actually be at home more for DS instead of spending nearly three hours a day travelling. There will be better opportunities for me in terms of work once I qualify and DS will have so much more on his doorstep in terms of extra curricular activities plus leisure facilities (swimming pool, parks, childrens sports teams, music lessons, art and drama clubs).
Currently just feel trapped where I am and see no future for us if we stay put but there's a village mentality that seems to hold people here for generations.
My family have been less than enthusiastic about this. Mum refuses to engage in discussion about it, my sister made horrible comments about my DP being DS' "new dad" and have said it's unfair to take DS out of school and away from his friends etc.
I don't feel I'm being selfish- I think that whilst there will be alot of adjusting for DS at first, in the long run this will open up opportunities and make life more settled for us both.
I'd like my family to see things from my point of view but atm there's just a horrible atmosphere and I also don't feel I need to 'justify' my decision to them but I'd like them to be on board.
I have a feeling they think the move is due to wanting to live with DP, but I had started looking at places to live in this town before we got serious.
I worry that maybe I am being selfish and just missing what everyone else seems to be seeing.
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34 replies
CurrySauce · 22/10/2016 21:02
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