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AIBU?

To ask if you've ever been thrown under a bus at work to cover someone else's cock up?

48 replies

Runny · 17/10/2016 12:30

Just that really.

This morning Ive discovered just how cuntish other people can be. I've been accused of not turning up for work, when as far as I was aware I wasn't supposed to even be there today. Apparently they phoned me on Friday to confirm it, and spoke to me. They didn't. I know they bloody well didn't, they are either a )confusing me with someone else or b) lying. I strongly suspect B.

What I think has happened is that the girl who organises all this has messed up. Forgot to contact me to confirm a shift, and is now saying she did and that I just haven't turned up to cover herself. She is exceptionally flakey and has made minor cock ups before, however I didnt actually have her down as such a devious lying cow until now. Im standing my ground for the time being, but quite honestly I really don't want to speak to her as I think I may explode and say stuff that I shouldnt,

Just wondering how I should handle this? I'm worried I will be sacked or something. Can they do that? I can prove I didn't phone them if needs be, but I'm aware it's my word against hers and as I'm right at the bottom of the food chain...

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Lolipoplady · 17/10/2016 12:49

Would there be a phone log at work, so they can check whether or not your number was actually called on Friday?

Sorry you're in such a horrible situation Flowers

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Allthewaves · 17/10/2016 12:58

Iv a manger who does this. I know communicate nearly everything by email and copy another boss in as was constantly being blamed for not passing on vital info ect. When manger gets caught out they do everything possible to deflect. It's actually turned into a joke among the staff she manages

If you are in a union I'd call them now. If thy keep pushing you then take it higher to her manager

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Allthewaves · 17/10/2016 12:58

Know=niw

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Allthewaves · 17/10/2016 12:58

Now even

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Runny · 17/10/2016 12:59

When I spoke to her this morning she said that 'someone', I don't know who, had apparently taken a message from me confirming it.

I can obviously prove it with my phone if needs be.

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Runny · 17/10/2016 13:09

Not in a Union sadly.

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P1nkP0ppy · 17/10/2016 13:10

Yep, mega cock up by Board Chair and Treasurer led to me losing my job as Dirctor because trustees are volunteers therefore answerable only to themselves therefore I was responsible and out.
Cost me my job, my health and three years later I still have very low self-esteem. I did take legal advice but didn't have the £10k needed to take them for constructive dismissal. I did get some compensation but it didn't go far.
It taught me never to trust anyone again and least of all Trustee boards.

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WhisperingLoudly · 17/10/2016 13:10

Be very firm that it was not you that she spoke to ask her to clarify who she "confirmed" with.

If appropriate send a concise message to your line manager stating that "there appears to be some confusion over whether I was expected in work yesterday. For the sake of clarity I confirm I was not notified that my attendance was required. Specifically I did not receive a call from X at any point on Friday"

FWIW I have managed flakes over the years. Everyone knows who they are. Chances are so does your boss.

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JellyBelli · 17/10/2016 13:11

Contact ASAC and ask for help, you can prove your case as you have your phone.
The Acas helpline number is 0300 123 1100. It is available Monday 8am-8pm, Tuesday 8am-6pm, Wednesday to Friday 8am-8pm and Saturday 9am-1pm.
www.acas.org.uk/index.aspx?articleid=2042

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WhisperingLoudly · 17/10/2016 13:15

And I appreciate you weren't actually asking for advice on how to handle things so to your other question:

Yes I was fucked over at the beginning of my professional career. I was too junior and inexperienced to appreciate just how horrific the woman's concerned behaviour was. I left not long after her bullying campaign started and I was devastated at the time.

Fortunately my life has turned out pretty awesome so In some ways the fact she tried to break me lead to my success.

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Runny · 17/10/2016 13:17

I tried to be firm, but was that dumbstruck I didn't really know what to say. I felt like they were calling me a liar.

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JellyBelli · 17/10/2016 13:20

She was calling you a liar. I've worked with people like that, they will sacrifice anyone to cover themselves. They out themselves in the end for sheer incompetance, but its no consolation.

Tell her in front of a witness your phone keep a record of incoming calls and watch her face.

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lilliedaisy · 17/10/2016 13:22

I have; a teacher invented an entirely fictitious meeting with me. It does make me laugh when people claim teachers would never lie!

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Imnotaslimjim · 17/10/2016 13:27

What a mess for the you.

I was blamed for something when I was 17 and it still rankles now. Working in a cafe in a bingo hall, it was up to the manager to make sure there was enough bread and milk every day. After just 2 weeks in there (so only been serving, had no idea of the running of it all) the manager wasn't in when I got there, just a note to say I was in charge! Suffice to say it all fell apart very quickly and 4 days later I received an official reprimand for running out of bread! I did try to complain but it went unheeded so I left a few weeks later.

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MackerelOfFact · 17/10/2016 13:31

That's outrageous. The onus should be on her to prove it did happen though, rather than for your to prove it didn't, since you can't affirmatively prove the absence of something.

I had a boss who would over-promise to clients and upper management, making her sound amazing and capable, and then blaming the team when we under-delivered, even though we told her from the outset that what she wanted was impossible. She would use wanky phrases like 'work smart, not hard' and 'you need to have big ambitions'.

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PootlewasthebestFlump · 17/10/2016 13:40

Yes my manager lied to senior bosses to claim I'd taken a lot of unauthorised leave without her knowledge which left us short staffed.

In fact I'd checked the legality of my leave, confirmed it all with her (in writing), informed the shift team manager and pointed out staffing issues.

The manager failed to act of staff shortages, got bollocking by Senior managers so blamed me. Her face in the disciplinary meeting when I instantly produced our chain of emails confirming the dates!

My attitude now is, if you have the moral high ground, fight it out. Never roll over and say die.

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TaterTots · 17/10/2016 13:41

A few years ago I was in a big meeting with boss's boss, who I already suspected didn't like me. I also suspected she was a total blogger who had schmoozed her way up. Everyone in the meeting had had to put together part of a document she'd then been given to review - the meeting was for her to respond, ask questions etc. After I'd been through my section she absolutely slated me, complaining X and Y was missing, it wasn't good enough... cue awkward faces from everyone else, as they'd bothered to read it properly and knee it was all in there. When I pointed this out she frantically blustered that obviously I hadn't made it clear enough, I needed to review it, blah blah blah. Nobody bought it.

She never forgave me. From then on she picked apart everything I did, pushed me aside at every opportunity, until I was eventually forced out. I despise her for the stress she put me through.

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ZuleikaDobson · 17/10/2016 13:53

I don't see how this woman can sustain the lie - it isn't just your word against hers, if what she said was true there would be independent evidence. She must be able to name the person who allegedly gave her the message; even if she has suffered convenient memory loss, I take it that there's only a limited number of people who would have taken such a call and it can be checked back with them? Plus there would be a record both of their call to you and your call back to them. It seems to me that you just need to make it very clear that no-one ever asked you to come in, you didn't call to say you would, and if she says differently she needs to prove it.

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ShebaShimmyShake · 17/10/2016 13:53

Show your phone logs with no record of her call. A lot of offices can log calls too so those can show she didn't contact you.

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CheesyWeez · 17/10/2016 13:55

WhisperingLoudly has good advice. I'd do that.

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anyusernamewilldo · 17/10/2016 13:56

Yes but a long time ago, by a manager trying to cover up his cock up, seems to be a theme in this thread!
I was firm and stood my ground and no way was I backing down, it was clear to the directors he was arse covering when we both had to go into a meeting and I was insistant and did not care I was dropping him in it, no matter how much he glared at me.
He got sacked shortly after and I was promoted, I had been practically doing his job for months anyway, which was glaringly obvious after the meeting when he was mud slinging at me, and I batted it all right back at him.

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littledrummergirl · 17/10/2016 14:00

Just wondering how I should handle this? I'm worried I will be sacked or something. Can they do that? I can prove I didn't phone them if needs be, but I'm aware it's my word against hers and as I'm right at the bottom of the food chain

This has happened to me when I was young, more recently with my dh. I handled it badly but thanks to experience my dh handled it much better.
My advice: ignore any mention of your absence unless it's part of an investigation or absence process.
Should they decide to discipline you they have to provide the evidence that you agreed to work. A signature on the schedule would suffice.
A phone call would come down to reasonable belief, they would need to provide evidence that this took place.

It would be unlikely to come under gross misconduct so unless you have a history of absence I wouldn't be worried.
Remember that if you've been there for less than two years you have little recourse if they decide to dismiss you.

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TheHuffAndPuffALot · 17/10/2016 14:12

Yes, I was stabbed in the back by someone I counted as a good friend as well as colleague. In the end I was awarded a substantial pay-off, found a less stressful job and finally fell pregnant so all's well that end's well and all that.

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AnUtterIdiot · 17/10/2016 14:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Gutted2016 · 17/10/2016 14:21

So many times.

Once was a terrible environment I was working in. It was the day of the London bombings and we had people in the city so I was tasked with calling them all to make sure they were safe. One girl never answered. I called her something like 25 times, paged, left messages, I even called her emergency contact to see if he had heard from her (he had so all was ok, it was just my calls she was avoiding) She waltzed in later on and I heard her in our managers office saying that she hadn't been called at all. Angry Both looked at me like I was scum of the earth and it was later used as ammunition for my slow push out the door!

Another was current job where I took on a dying project assisting someone that no one got on with. She blamed me for the lot going down hill but thankfully our manager saw it for what it was and thanked me for being so patient.

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