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AIBU to think a five year old should be responsible for their belongings?!!

(57 Posts)
mumhas1syllable Thu 13-Oct-16 10:35:19

IE: quite simply taking their book bag and coat to the car in the morning and when I pick them up??
side note: long time lurker, first time poster - go easy on me MN's (wink)

idontlikealdi Thu 13-Oct-16 10:41:39

I carry 5yo DTs book bags and water bottles to school. Just makes for an easier life. I also constantly have to check if they have all their belongings after school.

RiverTam Thu 13-Oct-16 10:43:21

I think it's rather unrealistic, tbh. Just keep reminding them and they'll get there in the end.

BastardGoDarkly Thu 13-Oct-16 10:43:43

Awwww 5 is still so little, I take it for mine, she does really well to look after herself and her things at school.

mrsblackcat Thu 13-Oct-16 10:44:28

It is a bit unreasonable yes.

They are five, they will forget things.

Pootles2010 Thu 13-Oct-16 10:45:19

Yes to encourage them, make it their job, but reminding when necessary. Which will be most days. ..

PosiePootlePerkins Thu 13-Oct-16 10:45:21

My 12 year old is just about getting the hang of it....wink

gallicgirl Thu 13-Oct-16 10:47:25

They don't remember with any degree of reliability.

My 5 year old is distracted by the mere act of breathing and frequently walks right past her book bag.

Huldra Thu 13-Oct-16 10:47:51

It's the job of the parents to teach children to plan and be responsible for their stuff. So reminders, questions and checks are all normal.

One of my children is a natural planner and seems to be born with an internal clock the other was a mess and needed lots of help. Not do things for him but get him to develop his own systems.

Huldra Thu 13-Oct-16 10:49:07

gallic love the bi about being distracted by the act of breathing.

mumhas1syllable Thu 13-Oct-16 10:49:25

Thank you :-) Perhaps I should just load child and belongings up in the car the night before - organisation is the key to success!! LOL!

seminakedinsomebodyelsesroom Thu 13-Oct-16 10:50:19

In my experience possibly yes YUBU. 5 is little, there are so many, many things that are a bazillion times more interesting and important to them than book bags and water bottles. That doesn't' mean YABU to remind them and help them to remember, but to expect it every day is probably a bit optimistic!

megletthesecond Thu 13-Oct-16 10:50:58

You're being optimistic I'm afraid.

My 9 yr old manages to forget to pick up his guitar despite it being placed right next to the door.

TeenAndTween Thu 13-Oct-16 10:51:52

YABU to expect them to remember things independently.
YANBU to expect them to carry them themselves when handed them.

Kr1stina Thu 13-Oct-16 10:53:35

Have you met many five years olds? < head tilt>

RiverTam Thu 13-Oct-16 10:54:27

Kr1srina Have you read the OP's response? <knobbish head tilt in return>

mumhas1syllable Thu 13-Oct-16 10:55:24

Gallic LOL!

mumofhandsomeboys Thu 13-Oct-16 10:56:48

It would be optimistic to expect a 5yo to remember her own things BUT absolutely not unreasonable to expect her to carry them to and from the car. As a teacher I see so many parents loaded up like donkeys, carrying everything for multiple children in and out of school. Why can't the child carry at least one thing of their own?! My 3yo is at preschool and has a bag, lunchbox and coat every day. I get everything ready and loaded by the front door. I then tell him to choose one/two things (depending on what else I have to carry) to carry to the car and then at the other end into preschool. He needs to learn (age-appropriate) responsibility!

Dontpanicpyke Thu 13-Oct-16 10:58:16

Put by the front door last thing at night. 5 is very young to be seen as responsible for anything much really.

Soubriquet Thu 13-Oct-16 10:58:27

Nope. They are 5. Easily forgotten

My damn 25 year old husband frequently forgets things!

gallicgirl Thu 13-Oct-16 10:59:40

Planning is key. Get bags packed the night before and put near the front door. Have hairbrushes, coats, shoes etc in a specified place so you always know where to find them. try to have a set routine so the child knows what to expect.

Then in the morning it gives you plenty of time to scream "get your shoes on" like a banshee while your child plays hopscotch on the stairs.

I have parents consultation today. If I'm not told my child lacks focus, I will be astonished.

mumhas1syllable Thu 13-Oct-16 11:00:13

RiverTam I was being facetious. I apologise that we have a different humour and it is obviously not translating to yourself. Yes I admit I am probably being a little optimistic but as a single parent with a full time job, I think it is justified to be a little frustrated. My child is generally pretty awesome and can get themselves ready independently bar the obvious breakfast making. Therefore I maybe expect more from them than others. However, a little rant on here to see if my optimism needs quietening down... not a reason to start hating. Just testing the waters. Thank you to all the other responses.

BathshebaDarkstone Thu 13-Oct-16 11:00:45

Seriously? I have to hand DD 9 her bags before we go out of the door, and she often forgets things when she comes out of school and has to go back upstairs for them. I'm hoping she'll be more responsible by year 7! grin

mumhas1syllable Thu 13-Oct-16 11:04:52

Yes we have a specific peg by the door and a routine. It is more the carrying to a from the car that I get frustrated about! The car is literally outside the front door!! lol. It's the constant nagging that is frustrating. The sound of my own voice is not something I want to hear all morning repeating itself!! ha ha.

PlumsGalore Thu 13-Oct-16 11:06:19

Have you ever seen Reception/Year 1 Lost Property box?

I live on a street near a High School, yesterday I went for a walk at 16:00, there were a pair of football shorts on the pavement and a coat that looked to fit a Year 8 boy further away on the wall.

Go figure.

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