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WIBU to tell this adult stranger to say please?

(39 Posts)
PinkyOfPie Wed 12-Oct-16 20:39:52

We live on a new-ish estate and the door numbers are confusing as they don't go up in odds/evens and there's lots of hidden cul-de-sacs randomly numbered, so we get a lot of confused drivers asking where a certain number house is and I'm always happy to help.

Tonight was on the driveway getting DD out the car and a bloke pulled up in a car, wound his window down and shouted "Number 11!" At me. I was a bit confused and thought I misheard, so I went up to his window and said "sorry?" And he said slowly and quite patronisingly "Number 11?".

Now I'm guessing he was frustrated at not finding the house and was therefore a bit moody but one of my huge bugbears is adults who don't say please and thank you, it (unreasonably) gives me the rage. So I replied "I think the word you're looking for is please". He rolled his eyes and said "whatever" and drove off.

I thought he was being a nob. DH said I was making a fuss over nothing and should have just told him where the house was and accepted that some people are just rude.

QOD Wed 12-Oct-16 20:41:11


He's a knob

TheWitTank Wed 12-Oct-16 20:41:33

Yeah, he was a knob. Hope he had to drive around for ages to find number 11.

Minisoksmakehardwork Wed 12-Oct-16 20:42:19

I would have replied no, assuming he was asking if you were number 11 rather than where it was. But manners cost nothing and lack of them bugs me so I don't think you're wholly unreasonable, just that you could have been a little more pilot.

PinkyOfPie Wed 12-Oct-16 20:42:24

Wit I actually regret not sending him to the wrong cul-de-sac grin

Minisoksmakehardwork Wed 12-Oct-16 20:42:35


Nishky Wed 12-Oct-16 20:43:00

I would have given him detailed directions- to the wrong place.

PotatoBread Wed 12-Oct-16 20:43:22

YANBU. Knob. Double knob for using the phrase 'whatever' like a moody teenager grin

mysistersimone Wed 12-Oct-16 20:44:11


Yoarchie Wed 12-Oct-16 20:44:21

Yes you are right he was a complete nob.

However, from a self preservation perspective you would do better not to tell an adult stranger to say please because some people already predisposed to nob behaviour might then punch you.

I've lived with someone violent. I tend to be very careful about not doing things that could piss off such a person.

museumum Wed 12-Oct-16 20:44:35

I'd have said "no, I'm number 27" or "what about number 11?"
He was rude.

PinkyOfPie Wed 12-Oct-16 20:46:19

Yoarchie that's exactly what DH said, he thinks it's fine to confront people, but not for me to do it in case I get punched 🙄 Have never been punched in my life (except aged 18 in a case of mistaken identity in a chippy but that's another story)

abbsismyhero Wed 12-Oct-16 20:47:21

i would have said nope im abbs have you tried checking the numbers on the houses? >helpful smile< i did automatically correct a teen the other week pulled them right up on their lack of manners turned around and realised it wasn't my teen it was someone else's blush

LouisvilleLlama Wed 12-Oct-16 20:51:30

I think it's rude, but it's commonplace and the norm now, atleast where I live. Many times when I say please, thank you, good morning etc it's often met with surprise.

I do think you were also rude though, I agree he could have been asking if you were number 11? To which you replied " i think the word you are looking for is please"

But I don't think there is many ways to reply that aren't to get across what you wanted to

bigbluebus Wed 12-Oct-16 20:53:10

In the absence of a proper question i would have just shouted another random number back at him.
On a whole other issue, why do developers number houses in such a ridiculous manner meaning no one can find the houses. Man in white van stopped outside my house the other day and shouted across to ask where a particular house was - couldn't hear if he was saying 14 or 40. Once I established the right number I directed him to the correct house, which doesn't even front our road even though it shares our street in it's address. Delivery drivers are often seen to be cruising up and down our street trying to figure out the numbering - and most of the houses have only been up for 3 years.

SuramarMom Wed 12-Oct-16 20:54:49

I hope yanbu because I do this grin

I'm not stopping through fear I might get punched either. Manners cost nothing. Punching will land you in the station (at least for a little while)

DaffodilsAreMyFav Wed 12-Oct-16 20:57:52

Your answer was spot on.

PinkyOfPie Wed 12-Oct-16 20:58:06

Louis our house is clearly numbered and visible he definitely didn't mistake us for number 11.

big I totally agree we usually get delivery drivers or dominoes pizza people confused and I don't blame them, there's no sense to any of the numbers. At one point number 45 is adjacent to number 70 confused we reckon the developers were pissed when they decided which house would be which!

Wooftweetwooftweet Wed 12-Oct-16 20:58:23

This is almost exaclty what happened me in the gym changing room. A woman approached me saying "toilets?"
She was with a gaggle of women in their 60s getting all glammed up for a night out and the cockiness seemed to get to her head.
I tried my first death stare and didn't answer. Felt good.

Gabilan Wed 12-Oct-16 21:12:56

"It's between 10 and 12"

Then just walk off. But I am unhelpful. And sarcastic.

kaitlinktm Wed 12-Oct-16 21:14:50

I usually get them as they don't say thank you. "No, please don't mention it" I say as they walk off without saying thanks

bertsdinner Wed 12-Oct-16 21:19:07

I was in our lift at work, and this woman got in, looked at me and said "4th floor". I just ignored her, she gave me a death stare (ignored that, too), and jabbed the button with her finger. If she'd said please I would have pressed it.
That guy sounds like a rude dick.

sonlypuppyfat Wed 12-Oct-16 21:21:18

I used to work in a shop if they didn't say thank you I used to shout Your Welcome, I hate bad manners

Chippednailvarnishing Wed 12-Oct-16 21:26:40

I would have pressed the button for the 4th floor and every other floor available...

justilou Thu 13-Oct-16 11:56:18

Three words...
Good... For... You!
So impressed!

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