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Anxiety and working from home

(10 Posts)
Foxysoxy01 Tue 11-Oct-16 18:28:26

This is not really an AIBU as I already know I am, but posting here as I need a little straight talking!

I am trying to overcome my anxiety disorder and part of it is being alone at home.

As I work from home I obviously need to be able to stay at home without having major panic attacks! I have got so much better than I was, at one point I had to time my DP work and my DM work around me not being left alone for longer than an hour. (Lucky they were both part home workers and very flexible)

I know it was completely unreasonable of me and am trying so hard to not get back to that point again.

My trigger is basically being home alone and worrying I might pass out or collapse and nobody would be home to call an ambulance and I would die because I didn't get help in time.

So what I'm asking for is a kick up the bum/any advice/ pro active ideas to help/ any straight talking you can offer.

I have tried meditation but it made me feel worse as my anxiety is health related and anything that makes me feel different to normal triggers my anxiety and I can't work anywhere other than home as I need tools etc to do my job.

I am also getting married next year so now is the time to sort this once and for all!

ShyFox Tue 11-Oct-16 18:36:34

Have you seen a therapist for cbt?

bamboobeanbags Tue 11-Oct-16 18:47:53

I was going to suggest either an alarm which you wear around you neck which you can use to alert people if you fall (like elderly people can get). Or an hourly check in with relatives.

But both of the above are just temporary measures which will feed your anxiety in the long run. Have you spoken to your GP about it extensively? Are you on any medication/ receiving CBT? You need to work on reducing the anxiety itself rather than learning how to cope with it.

AidingAndAbetting Tue 11-Oct-16 18:54:32

You need professional help with this one OP. You can't go on like this. CBT can be really helpful for anxiety.

In the meantime, how about you arrange to check in via text with someone every hour and if they haven't heard from you then they call you?

Fusspilz Tue 11-Oct-16 19:08:21

Go back to the GP and discuss it with them. Maybe try a different medication, as they won't all feel the same. best wishes!

Foxysoxy01 Tue 11-Oct-16 19:11:23

Thanks for the ideas smile

I was with a therapist but it actually made me fixate on my anxiety more and to be honest I don't think we gelled.
I'm not sure what the magic cure is other than just keep living through it and eventually it won't be so bad, kind of like exposure therapy.

I sort of hoped other people might have been where I am or a bit of straight talking might help confused

Your right, It might be a bit beyond that though.

Foxysoxy01 Tue 11-Oct-16 19:14:30

My GP was a bit rubbish and gave me a phone number to ring to arrange a NHS therapist but luckily I could afford to get one privately otherwise the wait etc would have been awful.
The care of people with mental health problems is pretty nonexistent where I am, there just isn't enough money to go round.

corythatwas Tue 11-Oct-16 19:19:12

Did the therapy give you any CBT-based exercises? The whole point of CBT is not to delve into your past or your deepest thoughts or anything like that, but to focus away from any thoughts that harm you and basically distract yourself. My dd has found it very helpful for anxiety, and so have I.

One that I use (and I know I keep trotting this one out all the time) is simply to visualise myself walking down a country road and coming to a crossroads. On one of the arms of the signpost is says "Stressful thoughts" and I look at it and say to myself "NO. I don't have to go down that road. I choose not to go down that road".

bamboobeanbags Tue 11-Oct-16 19:46:48

Try the website
Lots of people on there who have similar experiences who offer straight talking but valuable advice.
You will get through this OP

MouseholeCat Tue 11-Oct-16 20:13:56

Hi OP, I've not been in exactly the same situation, but have an anxiety disorder and have worked through similar issues in the past myself.

Alongside the CBT-type stuff (amazing, but took trial and error to find the right person), I found that taking time to boost my confidence in areas separate from my anxiety really helped me. I started yoga, running and cycling, gradually easing them into my life. All of them hugely reduced my panics and made me feel great about myself.

It might be different for others, but having an anxiety disorder made me feel crap about myself and what I could achieve, and that self-hate fuelled the anxious behaviours I used to protect myself and perpetuated the cycle. The positive energy I got form the new activities helped fuel the good actions I was taking in therapy.

When I'm sliding now and the past behaviours creep back I take a day out of my normal life and go through CBT exercises. I always tell DH I'm taking a mental health day so he knows and can offer support if I need it. The biggest thing for me is writing down my worries and then rationalising them. I then tear up the paper and go for a run.

It's like I've learnt to manage my mental wellbeing, whereas previously I always felt managed by it.

You can do it OP grin

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