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To not give them choices for dinner anymore

(56 Posts)
Happyhippy45 Mon 10-Oct-16 17:12:32

I cook pretty much everything from scratch and do all the cooking in our house. I have a nice selection of homemade ready meals in the freezer which are great for busy days and when folks need to eat at different times.
After a busy day my DH and adult ds didn't fancy anything I had made. They were all meals they have happily eaten before but weren't in the mood for.
I gave them 7 different dinner options. Salmon supreme, beef lasagne, cottage pie, beef curry, shepherds pie made from leftover roast lamb, lentil curry or Mac and cheese.
I was met with "What else is there?"
They seriously expected me to come up with something else. I didn't.
Really fucked off with them for behaving like entitled twats. DH thought I was a bit out of order getting angry about it.

LadyCallandraDaviot Mon 10-Oct-16 17:14:24

point them to the freezer/cupboards and let them get on with it!

HughLauriesStubble Mon 10-Oct-16 17:14:38

You've created the stick to flog your own back with by offering choices OP. It's a case of 'eat what you're given or go hungry' round here.

rainbowunicorn Mon 10-Oct-16 17:16:53

I wouldn't have offered choices in the first place. I would have made on thing put it in front of them and that would be the end of it.

Happyhippy45 Mon 10-Oct-16 17:17:19

Yeah I think I'm going to have to make some changes. Usually when I make dinner they are doing other chores. Maybe we should swap?

scurryfunge Mon 10-Oct-16 17:18:43

I always offer a choice if it's my turn to cook. Take it or leave it.

Happyhippy45 Mon 10-Oct-16 17:19:29

When I cook a meal from scratch, that's what they eat. No choices. It's just when we are using the meals from the freezer that they get a choice. I just bung them in the oven, no extra work involved.

madein1995 Mon 10-Oct-16 17:19:57

Yanbu, especially if they were just being fussy and not genuine likes or dislikes. Why did you do 7 meals op? I'd do 2 at a Max - catering to genuine likes and dislikes - but then as they're both adults they could sort their own meal out so no need really for 2 meals. I'm afraid o would shout, have a proper rant and tell them to cook their own fucking tea, call them twats, lazy bastards etc and remind them I Am wife/mum jo a short order bloody cook

Happyhippy45 Mon 10-Oct-16 17:21:54

made I had saved all these meals up in the freezer. No bloody way would I be cooking 7 different meals from scratch....I'm good but I'm not that good😂

MitzyLeFrouf Mon 10-Oct-16 17:23:08

I gave them 7 different dinner options.

You've spoilt them for far too long. Let the indulged dh and adult son make their own dinner!

PinkFreesia Mon 10-Oct-16 17:24:01

as long as there's cheese and bread, no ones going

MitzyLeFrouf Mon 10-Oct-16 17:25:08

The only time I've ever had seven different dinner options is in a restaurant.

WiIdfire Mon 10-Oct-16 17:25:31

You can keep the choice - just make it 'shepherds pie or sort yourself out'. Better still, on freezer recook days, just let them sort themselves out anyway. As you say, its no effort.

scurryfunge Mon 10-Oct-16 17:26:06

Happy, I do this also...there is always enough food left over from every meal to freeze a portion for someone's packed lunch/ dinner alone when on shifts. It pisses me off when there is a meal in the freezer catering for every world food tastes but no one "fancies it". My mantra is eat it or die ( or make your own fucking delicacy).

FreshHorizons Mon 10-Oct-16 17:28:24

You should never have given them choices in the first place!
Put your foot down and announce that you are not a restaurant and from now in there will be 3 choices:
Take it
Leave it
Cook your own.

Don't deviate from that - simply tell them it is not your problem.

TheRedCarWon Mon 10-Oct-16 17:29:34

In our house the choices are: get what what you're given, sort yourself out or go hungry.
We have recently started planning our meals on a weekly basis so we know what to buy, what to expect and what to start cooking when we come home. This has helped massively with the nightly "what to make/dunno, you choose/cba to cook/there's nothing that'll make an actual meal" debacle. Saves us a fortune too.

Charlesroi Mon 10-Oct-16 17:36:39

If it's stuff they normally eat and they 'just don't fancy it' then they ain't hungry. Direct them to the nearest tin opener/microwave.

Happyhippy45 Mon 10-Oct-16 19:35:22

Did I mention I'm a chef?.........
Also when I was asking them what they wanted I had a small notebook in my hand with a list of the freezer meals on it. My son laughed and said it looked like I was a waitress taking their orders. That might have been what pissed me off the most in hind sight.
I was a SAHM for 14 years (I did a bit of catering, cooking lessons and volunteered at my kids school during this time.)....definitely made a rod for my own back. This is going to be a big challenge for me to change their ways. Any suggestions on how to do it without too much conflict?

TheSnorkMaidenReturns Mon 10-Oct-16 19:38:29

Just tell them you can't do it anymore!

No choice here. Meal planning. Sometimes I say 'steak tonight or Friday?'. Other than that you get what you are given. I only cook what I know is liked by all so not forcing unpleasant food on people.

YouTheCat Mon 10-Oct-16 19:39:29

Stop cooking for them.

Make lovely meals and freeze them and let them sort themselves out.

I'd do it with conflict because they are taking the piss.

BuggersMuddle Mon 10-Oct-16 19:50:47

I can see why it's annoying, but not sure why you'd be angry unless you were unable to just let them get on with it confused given you are all adults.

Do you freeze individual portions? That's what we do so on day when we cba, if DP fancies chilli and I fancy chicken curry, then there's no problem.

Equally anyone who doesn't want to have what's in the freezer is more than welcome to cook for themselves / everyone, heat up some pasta & pesto or go to the chippy as they see fit....

cheapandcheerful Mon 10-Oct-16 19:56:05

When I'm planning what to get from the supermarket I say to dh and dc "Anything you want from the supermarket or anything you're desperate to have for dinner in the near future?"

If they specify something at that point then I will buy the stuff and cook it on the day of my choosing, otherwise they get what they are given.

dirtywindows Mon 10-Oct-16 20:01:22

I make a weekly menu that everyone is welcome to contribute to. I put it up on the fridge so they all know what they're getting each night. As I only buy ingredients for those meals and sometimes prepare in advance there are no options to make changes. Works well for us.

Happyhippy45 Mon 10-Oct-16 20:04:03

buggers I freeze individual portions but I organise dinner while they do other chores or sit on their arse.
I'm annoyed with them and felt disrespected because they expected me to give them more options even though I'd offered them 7 different ones.
It's been in the works for a while. DH has been much better the past few days RE dinner. My hissy fit must have worked a bit on him. Ds still need much more work.

2catsandadog Mon 10-Oct-16 20:05:12

I have 2 options. Yes please and no thank you.

There is no other choice. And no. Takeaway ordering is not an option either.

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