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To ask for your help with applying for a non molestation order

(14 Posts)
Mooey89 Mon 10-Oct-16 14:20:07

Sorry, brazenly using AIBU for traffic.

ExH violent, emotionally abusive.
Over the weekend he sent multiple threatening texts (not unusual), had his father, daughter, mother contact me, arrived at my house, threatened to go to my parents house, promised he would 'make me pay'.

Have written to him before threatening that if he continues will get non mol.

Saw a solicitor today who said based on info I will get one.
She said I can do it myself or hire her , I am not eligible for legal aid due to income so going to try and do it myself.

I have the forms here, can I fill in the main form In pen?
What should I include in my statement?

Is it a terrible idea to do it myself??

Lovewineandchocs Mon 10-Oct-16 14:32:40

Hi OP, are you applying for an emergency NMO? It's been a while since I practiced family and domestic law, and I am in Northern Ireland. However-I think it is fine to complete the form in pen. Just write out exactly what happened, as if it were a witness statement (which it is) and write at the bottom "I believe the facts in this witness statement to be true" and sign and date it. It's not a terrible idea to seek an emergency order yourself but for the full hearing your ex may have representation and you will be questioned, so it may be better to get a solicitor for that.

Mooey89 Mon 10-Oct-16 14:36:01

I don't know if I'm doing an emergency one!

Can I fill in the paperwork myself and then enlist a solicitor if he had representation?

Thank you so much for your reply. Feeling very wobbly!!

I'm not sure if they can help but could it be worth speaking to citizens advice?

Gracey79 Mon 10-Oct-16 14:47:52

Do you have any children? Only ask as I did my own non mol with no solicitor but realised in hindsight it was a huge mistake as when he took me to court for custody had I gone to a solicitor she would likely have pre empted information which could have been used in family court

JellyBelli Mon 10-Oct-16 14:48:26

Google for the citizens Advice Bureau, and your local Law Centre.
Law Centres are for people like yourself, that fall outside of the legal safety net. You should get free legal advice and help filling in the form.
Pick the one that can help you the fastest.

c3pu Mon 10-Oct-16 15:07:36

I've not done a Non-Mol, but I filed for a CAO and represented myself without too much bother.

Basically all I did was google it to the Nth degree and give it my best shot.

Usually you need 3 copies of each form you are submitting - One for you, one for the respondent, and one for the court.

Will you be applying for the Non-Mol ex parte?

Mooey89 Mon 10-Oct-16 17:50:17

The absolute fucker has got his 11 year old daughter to text me!

Lovewineandchocs Mon 10-Oct-16 21:19:18

Oh no! What did the 11 year old text?! It's an emergency, or ex parte, order if it's to go to court immediately and he won't be appearing. The order is granted temporarily with a view to a full hearing where he can contest it. Perhaps you could ring the court office and ask if you aren't sure about whether it is an emergency one. Certainly do this bit by yourself if you wish but as he sounds likely to be difficult then you'd be better seeking legal representation for the full hearing. You're also better staying in your application that you don't want him getting his family to contact you either.

Mooey89 Tue 11-Oct-16 18:12:37

So I filed the papers today for an emergency ex parte application and they said that a judge would see me today!

Saw the judge and it was absolutely awful.
He basically said that he didn't feel that it was urgent, and said that the messages were 'open to interpretation'.

He has relisted the case for next Friday, and bailiffs serve the papers to him.

I am basically freaking out now that this is the wrong thing and has blown way out of proportion.

I phoned the court and asked if I could withdraw the application to give me time to reconsider and approach legal representation and re- submit at another time - they said the judge has to decide and the bailiffs may have already served him with the paperwork.

I can't stop crying, I feel so stupid.

Florene Tue 11-Oct-16 18:17:34

Report harassment to police.

Select some of worst messages to show them and exhibit. Include yours where you told him to stop.

In your statement, say that you would be supportive of a restraining order if granted.

If he is arrested and charged, and found guilty at court, they may impose a restraining order preventing him from contacting you, at no cost to yourself.

Good luck.

Lovewineandchocs Tue 11-Oct-16 21:19:49

Agree about reporting to police. OP please don't freak out or feel stupid. I'd go back to your solicitor tomorrow and explain what has happened and ask her to represent you on Friday. If he wants to contest the order it is up to him to explain why and explain himself with regard to the messages. If he contacts you at all between now and next Friday make sure you pass this on to your solicitor as this will all strengthen your case.

c3pu Wed 12-Oct-16 09:37:09

If the first hearing has left you feeling rough and knocked your confidence, consider instructing your solicitor to represent you?

Do make sure you report any threats or harassment, as unsubstantiated claims don't hold much water in the family court.

Daniah2911 Fri 02-Dec-16 20:59:41

Hi can any one please help me! I applied for a non molestation order against my ex following an incident which resulted in him getting a caution. I then had a temp non mol out in place and we're going back to court next week, I no longer want to extend this how can I put an end to it?? Can my ex put in writing to the judge his reasons to dispute the order to?? Thanks

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