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To bloody hate hats at weddings?

(23 Posts)
BeingATwatItsABingThing Sun 09-Oct-16 12:55:59

We have started planning our wedding for 2 years time and I was just talking to my DM about it this morning. I said I wanted to ban hats (slightly lighthearted) because they ruin photos. You can't see half the people behind them. Plus, they ruin the view of the wedding ceremony for anyone unfortunate enough to sit behind someone wearing one. DM said I can't ban hats and people will think I am a bridezilla...

Are my reasons valid or should I just let it go? Prepared to be told IABU.

Soubriquet Sun 09-Oct-16 12:57:06

Well yes yabu

You can't tell people what they can and can't wear

BeingATwatItsABingThing Sun 09-Oct-16 12:58:01

Yes, I know I can't (and I won't actually do it) but AIBU to want to?

ViolettaValery Sun 09-Oct-16 12:58:31

YABU sorry, but you could have a word with the photographer and ask them to make people take them off if they're getting in the way, that seems reasonable.

AnotherEmma Sun 09-Oct-16 12:58:51

Sorry but you are being unreasonable.
Some people love getting dressed up at weddings and wearing a fancy hat.
I'm sure they will take their hats off during the ceremony but you could always ask the registrar/priest/celebrant to politely remind people to take them off.
We didn't have a dress code at our wedding. We wanted people to feel comfortable. We certainly weren't stressing about how everyone would look in the photos (and the photos were lovely, including photos of people in hats!)

NorbertDentressangle Sun 09-Oct-16 12:59:34

YANBU providing you ban fascinators as well! I really can't see the point of them.

A hat is a hat and has some practical uses, but a fascinator?! It's just a head band with fluffy and sparkly shit stuck on, a bit like grown up deely boppers smile

Soubriquet Sun 09-Oct-16 13:01:00

Ah Yanbu to want to in a hypothetical sense though

roasted Sun 09-Oct-16 13:01:04

I quite like fascinators. And they tend to block people's views less than hats!

BeingATwatItsABingThing Sun 09-Oct-16 13:01:32

I hate fascinaters too! grin I think I hold a grudge against them though after a lady had a massive one at a wedding and it kept wafting in my face during the ceremony. She was sat in the row in front and we weren't exactly near each other. hmm

reup Sun 09-Oct-16 13:02:58

Just have photos that are rows of one person deep - surely a person in front will block a person behind anyway unless you are sorting everyone by size!

I can't remember ever feeling worried I couldn't see every second of a wedding ceremony because of someone's hat. It's not like it's the theatre. The words tend to be pretty standard!

According to these threads there are lots of awful demanding people getting married - I'm sure you can ask people not to wear them. Then you will be judged by those who disagree as a major diva.

BeingATwatItsABingThing Sun 09-Oct-16 13:11:33

I'm not actually going to ban them. I didn't make it clear enough in my OP, but this is a hypothetical situation. Basically, does anyone agree with me that hats are the work of the devil?

LetsJunglyJumpToIt Sun 09-Oct-16 13:13:32

Hats aren't as bad as those ridiculous looking fascinators.

DeliciousIrony Sun 09-Oct-16 13:49:44

YANBU, I think most wedding hats/fascinators look shite.

BadGrandma Sun 09-Oct-16 14:06:01

I'll put my hands up here and admit I am a hat-wearer - I have several and do wear them a lot.
I don't know if you're planning a church wedding of any flavour - be aware that many people of "a certain age" were brought up to feel that women should cover their heads in church. That feeling is pretty rare now in itself, but it has led to a tradition that women wear hats at things like weddings and funerals. And whilst it's generally considered good manners for a man to remove his hat indoors, women generally aren't expected to - partly because they've often arranged their hair around the hat and taking the hat off (particularly for the fascinator thingies) disturbs the hairstyle badly.
You could always make sure that the big-hatted ones stand at the back in the photos... providing boxes for them to stand on if need be smile

KC225 Sun 09-Oct-16 14:13:21

Bloody love hats, I always wear a hat to a wedding. One of my main reasons for going

helenatroy Sun 09-Oct-16 14:19:03

I adore a hat. Have cried at the beauty of one on more than ice occasion.

BeingATwatItsABingThing Sun 09-Oct-16 14:28:24

Not in a church so hopefully less people will wear them. I can live in hope.

RaspberryOverloadTheFirst Sun 09-Oct-16 14:33:14

I'm sure they will take their hats off during the ceremony

Most weddings I've been to, the women in particular didn't remove their hats.

kensausage13 Sun 09-Oct-16 22:31:00

YANBU hats at weddings are awful. And, let's face it, there is always at least one person who wears a hat who really shouldn't wear a hat!

MrsTerryPratchett Sun 09-Oct-16 22:34:13

Best things about weddings, hats. I really suit them and can't really wear them in RL. When people decide to have weddings in stupid, sunny, no shade areas I can forgo the sunscreen as well.

And men are supposed to remove hats in Church, women aren't.

WingsofNylon Sun 09-Oct-16 22:35:12

Yanbu. I hate them too and really wish that I could ask people not to wear them at ours. Sadly this wouldn't go down well.

JulietteL Sun 09-Oct-16 22:44:30

We made a bit of a joke of it and told all guests that by edict of the mothers of both the bride and groom, hats and fascinators were banned (both my mum and MIL are quite short and thought hats would make them look like mushrooms). Some people still turned up in hats/fascinators but most didn't. And AFAIK no one took offence...

AndShesGone Sun 09-Oct-16 22:54:23

You don't take them off during the ceremony

You may take them off at the reception once someone ( brides mother?) has removed hers at the top table. But you don't have to.

I always wear a hat and never take it off. Hair looks crap if I've been wearing a hat.

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