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AIBU?

To get a job at DS's school

12 replies

Breadrollsandcakes · 06/10/2016 10:52

Right, so DS is 12. He has ASD, he's just started secondary school. We've had a few issues and he's not finding it easy, I contacted his keyworker a few times and she's told me, in no uncertain terms, to step back as DS needs to become more independent. So I've taken that on board and have stepped back. DS is finding it hard but I'm thinking 'school know best'

Before this happened though, I applied for a job at DS's school as admin assistant. I applied for it because it's close to my house and it fits in with my kids. I've been at SAHM since he's was born, not always through choice but circumstances, childcare was expensive, my previous job was shifts and dh worked away a lot. I had no support, still don't, and it's hard and lonely. I had a breakdown four years ago. Anyway, I've got an interview for this job next week. Totally out of the blue, i have absolutely no confidence and I'm scared. I'm worried I'd be an embarrassment to DS or that he'd cling to me. I don't want to interfere with him and I'm worried he may be bullied if I was there, he's been badly bullied in the past because of his autism. Maybe his keyworker is right, I'm sure she doesnt know about this interview and would think it a bad idea?

I've seen a college course I'm interested in, to train as a TA, maybe I could work with kids like my DS, but just not at his school?

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jessica29054 · 06/10/2016 10:55

It's not ideal but go for the interview and see what happens. Admin assistant isn't too frontline really

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JosephineMaynard · 06/10/2016 10:55

If the job is for an admin assistant, you surely won't be in much contact with any of the pupils though?

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IhatchedaSnorlax · 06/10/2016 10:58

I say go for it, if for no reason other than interview experience. I agree with the pp though, surely admin assistant wouldn't be near the children anyway so if you do get the job, keep your distance from him. Good luck.

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Jayfee · 06/10/2016 11:00

I would go for the interview. Good practice and if you get offered the job, then decide whether its for you. You sound like a sensible parent. It is a hard balance to give enough support whilst encouraging independence. As a teacher and parent, I would trust your instinct. Sorry not to be more precise but we humans are complicated!

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UsernameHistory · 06/10/2016 11:10

I'm a head.

I have had very few (only one springs to mind) issues with parents who are also staff.

You sound like a normal, sensible person so behave like one at school and there won't be any issue I'm sure.

Remind yourself that you're a parent after 3:35 but you're Mrs Breadrolls the Admin Ass. during school hours. It can be tricky at first to differentiate the two but, as I said, parents who get to see the workings of the school generally understand how things work quickly and allow the school to do its job.

Teachers get a very heavy discount on the school fees at my school so most teachers' children are pupils. Again, very, very rarely a problem.

Ask his keyworker. They probably know best but everything's a balance. Children will sense if their mother's unhappy. You having a happy life will benefit him too.

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jessica29054 · 06/10/2016 11:11

It's a bit different in private school though, Username

I think the main thing is ensuring your DS doesn't default to you if there's a problem in school.

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Vagndidit · 06/10/2016 11:14

I work at DS's primary and it's no trouble at all. He barely acknowledges me when I'm at work--and he's usually my very clingy only child.

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SugarMiceInTheRain · 06/10/2016 11:25

I'd say go for it. As an admin assistant, particularly in a secondary school, you'd be lucky to see him in school from one day to the next. If it were a TA or teaching post it'd be different obviously.

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Breadrollsandcakes · 06/10/2016 12:22

Thank you for your advice everyone. I think I'll go to the interview. I really don't expect to get it tbh so there's probably no decision to make anyway!! If I don't I'll enroll on the course Smile

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UsernameHistory · 06/10/2016 14:15

jessica29054

The number of children of staff is likely higher, yes, but the sentiments are the same.

Good luck Bread.. Drop the I really don't expect to get it attitude. Expect to get it, you'll be more likely to and you'll get to make the decision as opposed to accept whatever you get.

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LemonBreeland · 06/10/2016 14:19

Presumably as it's a senior school it's a reasonable size. I wouldn't work at my children's primary school but I would work at the high school because it's bigger and children have less dealings with the office staff there.

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TheSnorkMaidenReturns · 06/10/2016 14:35

Staff at my local secondary can apply for places for their children with a different code on the application form! Not as high as a sibling preference but higher than "everyone else". Basically the school knows it has to make it easy for staff to manage their lives to get the best out of them.
In a large secondary you can avoid each other.

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