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To have a little crush on my dd's besties dad?

(23 Posts)
CowboysAndKisses Mon 03-Oct-16 01:34:43

So I'm married and love my husband and it's strictly window shopping! I would never act on it. I see him and Facebook quite a lot as our daughters are best friends. He's single and we enjoy banter. My friend has pointed out that I spend a lot of time talking to him when he picks up/ drops off. He also talks to my husband a lot! Yes it's very slightly flirty but that's in my nature anyway and DH hasn't passed comment. He is good looking, very funny and just a genuinely nice person. We only ever talk about our girls and most of our banter is about his cooking! I'm not doing anything wrong by having a little crush am I? Surely everyone has them?

Amethyst81 Mon 03-Oct-16 01:40:23

I have little crushes all the time, usually triggered by having a dream about someone. I never act on them or even flirt, but it brightens up a boring week to have a little fantasy now or then. I always get over it and would be horrified if the person ever found out!

JellyBelli Mon 03-Oct-16 01:46:42

Crushes are sweet and harmless as long as you never act on them.

KC225 Mon 03-Oct-16 02:54:14

Nothing wrong with a bit of flirty flirts providing the crush stays mostly in your head.

trufflehunterthebadger Mon 03-Oct-16 03:15:12

Dd's best friend's dad is really attractive and makes me blush. tis the highlight of my rare school run days if he is there :D

sonlypuppyfat Mon 03-Oct-16 03:34:23

One of the dad's on the school run is breathtaking I stare at his reflection in the classroom window!

trufflehunterthebadger Tue 04-Oct-16 15:47:25

I had a great result yesterday. Usually i look like shite on the school run, yesterday i had bought a new top and some new makeup, trendy sunglasses. I looked, for once, quite cool.

Guess who i bumped into :D

Trefoil Tue 04-Oct-16 15:49:34

I go weak at the knees in the presence of really attractive men

Idliketobeabutterfly Tue 04-Oct-16 15:52:50

Nowt wrong with window shopping as long as you don't open your purse

CowboysAndKisses Wed 05-Oct-16 23:09:41

Trufflehunterthebadger - fantastic! I'm usually in my pjs with my hair shoved into a messy bun when I see my crush! blush

WorraLiberty Wed 05-Oct-16 23:55:08

I was all set to say YANBU at all but if your friend has picked up on it, and you feel the need to validate it by starting a thread, it sounds as though you have a niggling problem with it maybe?

TinklyLittleLaugh Thu 06-Oct-16 00:14:25

I had a crush on DD2's best friend's Dad. DD1 ruthlessly pointed out that he looks very very much like DH, as she tends to do with all my crushes. Spoilsport. I obviously have a type.

KanyesVest Thu 06-Oct-16 00:47:51

Dd's bestie's dad is a total dreamboat. Tall, rugged, teeny bit posh loaded, successful, interesting... I have a slight swoon when I see him.

Hottie dad in ds's class turned out to be a total dick. I was thrilled only vaguely sympathetic when I heard he had gout. He's not remotely attractive since I actually spoke to him.

NavyandWhite Thu 06-Oct-16 08:00:29

Fine to have a crush but that's all. A crush can quickly escalate into other things though so be warned and be careful.

stopfuckingshoutingatme Thu 06-Oct-16 09:16:22

hmm. so if there was a school night out, and it was just you and him at that taxi rank..and he made a pass...?? best to manage this a bit I think

you know its off, hence why you posted!

AuntieStella Thu 06-Oct-16 09:28:00

Getting flirty is where you start getting onto dodgy ground, and you know this (that comment resonating, people noticing).

And the 'there's no way anything would happen' is a really common part of the 'baby steps' route to an emotional affair (which almost always leads to a physical one).

Having a (silent) crush is one thing. Acting on it by flirting is when it becomes a bit more problematic.

Make damned sure you are never alone with him.

Oblomov16 Thu 06-Oct-16 09:40:08

Surely everyone has them?
no. crush on a celebrity is one thing, RL is actually more dangerous.

witsender Thu 06-Oct-16 09:44:58

I think it sounds to have gone a little too far...flirting, 'banter', FB chats, friends noticing...

AnchorDownDeepBreath Thu 06-Oct-16 09:50:53

I'm with Worra. Crushes are fine, a bit of minor flirting is generally fine, but you've taken it overboard here - your friends are noticing and you're seeking reassurance that this is fine. You're sailing very closely to the wind!

I'd either see him less, if you can do so without it being awkward, or cut the flirty behaviour back. Being flirty when there's a strong attraction and both of you are taken is literally flirting with danger. It's also not very nice for your DP if others have noticed, even if he himself hasn't yet.

Branleuse Thu 06-Oct-16 09:54:49

I dont think its really ok to be flirting with him so openly. Youre being disrespectful to your partner/relationship and on dodgy ground

LyingWitchInTheWardrobe Thu 06-Oct-16 09:56:08

I agree with Worra as well. You sound a tiny bit delighted with it all - a husband and a crush dancing attendance on you. Be careful there.

It only takes very tiny, insignificant steps to take you out of acceptable behaviour and your behaviour is going to be noticeable to more than just your friend if you don't reign it in.

Discobabe Thu 06-Oct-16 09:58:54

What Worra said

CowboysAndKisses Thu 06-Oct-16 19:54:32

It's really not like that at all! I'm flirty natured, always have been. I've never cheated or even wanted to. I'm not saying I want to or that I've thought about it. If he made a pass I would be genuinely mortified! My friend is making a mountain out of a molehill I think, there have been a few more things said recently and I get the impression she is jealous of my life with DH and the fact that someone else finds me attractive.

I actually told my DH that I think dd's bestie is fit (in a jokey kind of way) he was not hurt at all. I also told him what my friend had said and his reply was "you are like that with everyone!" It's really upset me that my friend could think that of me. My DH is my world, no matter how fit the dad is, nice etc he couldn't come close to my man. There truly is nothing in it.

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