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(17 Posts)
GizmoFrisby Thu 29-Sep-16 14:40:41

Am I being a bitch or not? I live near this lady and we walk up to school sometimes with our dogs, however if it rains I tend to drive. I have picked her dcs up a few times and given her lifts, aibu to feel like I'm expected to do this every time it rains or should I automatically expect to do it or is it not my responsibility??

LemonBreeland Thu 29-Sep-16 14:42:47

Who is making you feel it is expected? Is she? Or is it your guilt that she would be walking in the rain?
You don't have to do it if you don't want to.

GizmoFrisby Thu 29-Sep-16 14:47:52

Erm I feel guilty but I have a baby and a 7yo so can't fit them all in the car. However I don't want it to be a regular occurrence that I'm expected to get them every day. It's hard enough getting baby out picking my ds up as they are all different ages. I just wondered wether I sound like a bitch bag not offerening to collect them. However we live in the lakes and it rains most days.

GizmoFrisby Thu 29-Sep-16 14:49:46

I have a slight gripe that I could end up being a taxi for her kids and expected to do it each time it rains. I may be overthinking

idontlikealdi Thu 29-Sep-16 14:52:50

Has she actually asked you to do it? It's a non event anyway if you can't fit them in your car.

MakeMyWineADouble Thu 29-Sep-16 14:52:58

I think you may be thinking about it to much from what you have said the other lady hasnt asked you to do this? Or commented when you haven't? So I don't see there is a issue if you can do it fab, if you can't no worries

GizmoFrisby Thu 29-Sep-16 14:56:44

No but I feel bad not offering however it's a pain me doing it all the time. However I don't want to look like a bitch. No she expects me to collect her kids and drop them off while she sits at home. As her kids and mine fit in the car however she doesn't fit. Does that make sense?

MakeMyWineADouble Thu 29-Sep-16 15:06:19

I think I get it. She doesn't ask for help and hasn't made you feel guilty when you haven't offered, but you feel bad if you don't offer? due to space when you do pick them up she stays at home? Its a pain and not something you want to be doing all the time but your worried you look like a bitch if you don't offer?

You don't! do whatever works for you and stop thinking about

GizmoFrisby Thu 29-Sep-16 15:08:48

Yes that's right. I wanted to know if sounded awful although I thought I might be overthinking. Thanks. smile

ClopySow Thu 29-Sep-16 15:11:23

Does she call and ask you to get them when it rains?

LemonBreeland Thu 29-Sep-16 16:11:36

You're not a bitch to not offer. You are busy enough with your own DC.

GizmoFrisby Thu 29-Sep-16 16:33:45

I feel like she expects it of me and thinks I'm a bitch if I don't offer. However I do think I may be overthinking. But I know if my car was in garage or I didn't drive I would also have to walk in the rain and not think about it. It's probably just me

NavyandWhite Thu 29-Sep-16 16:42:16

Why do you feel like she expects it off you? What has she done to make you feel like that?

GizmoFrisby Thu 29-Sep-16 16:56:56

Well I live 9 doors away from her, so it's just me that feels bad. I suppose she has never said she expects it. But my thing is, should I just do it out of good will. Or if it's pissing me off just don't do it as I'm not a taxi service. Wouldn't we all like our kids to be chauffeured to and from school without getting out of bed? Or leaving the house?

MissBattleaxe Thu 29-Sep-16 17:01:30

YABU for not putting something in your thread title. I really hate it when threads in AIBU are just called "AIBU?". It's a real bugbear of mine.

Also YABU because she hasn't asked you and you're overthinking it.

butterfliesandzebras Thu 29-Sep-16 17:07:50

You would not be unreasonable to not always offer her kids a lift. You would be kind to offer them a lift sometimes/when it suits you. If she thinks you're a bitch for not always offering, that's her problem, and nothing to do with you (but she probably doesn't unless she's a complete bitch, in which case, why do you care?)

GizmoFrisby Thu 29-Sep-16 17:29:50

Thanks yes I do care I just didn't want to look like a bitch and just wondered what others thoughts were. Yes I admitted I was probably overthinking the situation but wanted others views on what they would do and their thought. Thanks
Oh and apologies battleaxe didn't mean to upset you. I'm new to mumsnet and didn't realise I had to put a title. grin

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