To think this isn't good for my soul

[Mummyyummy2012]

We rent in an expensive part of the south east. We can't afford to buy if we stay here but my kids are happy in school, I have a great career and a great social life.
However, I opened some post by mistake that was for landlord- we've never had post of theirs sent here before so genuine mistake. It was a mortgage letter- their mortgage is £149 a month and our rent is £1100. I feel really sick - we are trapped not being able to save for our own home despite most of our life being good.
I feel a bit sickened by it all- the years are ticking by- I am in my early 40s now- I just want a place to call my own. Aibu to think it's all not very good for my soul to know that the landlord is making so much money out of us and to move somewhere new/ cheaper (would mean a total relocation) ? Most of my life is great but this housing issue is having a big impact on me!

[WordGetsAround]

But your landlord has also paid a (probably very large) deposit and has presumably been paying tribute mortgage for many more years than you've lived in the house. They also maintain the house and are financially responsible for anything that goes wrong (boiler etc). I don't see that you knowing their monthly payment amount makes any difference.

[R2G]

You could try saying that you are struggling at the moment and wondered if they would sign a longer tenancy agreement in return for a reduction in rent.

[AnythingMcAnythingface]

Don't base your decision on the difference between rent and mortgage.

You move out, someone else moves in. His bill is paid.

Look at your life. If you aren't in integrity with you life purpose and values that is what will destroy your soul.

[saveforthat]

You could rent from a landlord who has no mortgage. How would you feel then?

[ImperialBlether]

But it would be the same at work, wouldn't it, if you compared your salary to the profits made by the organisation?

If you're paying a reasonable rent for the area, then there's nothing you can do about it, unfortunately.

[Sassypants82]

It's just the way it is. You're paying for the use of the house, presumably the market rate, despite the fact that the landlord's mortgage is small. You're still getting your service for the going rate. Why does it bother you that the landlord's investment is earning them an income. Also, they may be on interest only with a payment that low & owe the capital balance yet.

[abbsismyhero]

it isn't good for your soul to dwell on such matters you have a roof over your head be glad of this

[IonaNE]

What saveforthat said.

[evelynj]

It's only not good for your soul if you make it!

Totally irrelevant what the mortgage is if the rent is fair for the area. Forget about it & carry on enjoying your life. If you can afford it could you buy a small holiday home somewhere that you can rent out?

[Blackfellpony]

The landlord would have had to fork out for deposit, decorating, maintenance, legal fees and paid a mortgage for years.

I don't see what the monthly payment has to do with your situation really?

[fastdaytears]

If the mortgage is so low then the landlord presumably has a lot of equity. He allowed to earn an income from his investment.

I'm not sure why you would expect rent and a mortgage to be roughly the same

[AdaLovelacesCat]

well that is the way of it....

[Graceflorrick]

They've probably paid most of the mortgage off already, that may have required hard work and sacrifice!

If you were to rent a similar property you'd be paying the same I guess, so rent itself is fair?

It's probably better to buy, but the reality is would you enjoy living in the house you could afford to buy? If not, stay where you are.

[SpaceUnicorn]

Aibu to think it's all not very good for my soul to know that the landlord is making so much money out of us and to move somewhere new/ cheaper (would mean a total relocation)?

I don't see how your 'soul' is connected to knowing how much your LL pays each month. Even if he was just breaking even, your situation would be what it is.

Most of my life is great but this housing issue is having a big impact on me!

You maybe need to explore this more deeply. It's brought something to the surface, but is your dissatisfaction genuinely just about the difference between his mortgage outgoings and your monthly rent?

[Shallishanti]

your soul will benefit from not having the angst of owning property
-what if the roof falls in?
-when were the gutters last cleaned?
-will the new road affect property prices?
-what if the boiler packs up?
-what if the tenants become unemployed?

[Blerg]

I get it. Similar situation here though don't know the details. Being trapped in renting does feel a bit soul destroying. The system seems unfair and out of whack. But to let just increases inequality in my view.

I fantasise about relocation but we can't because of specific sector jobs. It is a factor but not the only one. Best of luck with what you decide.

[TheProblemOfSusan]

It isn't good for your soul at all, and if you can find a way to move in you should, but yanbu.

The rental market in the UK is predicted on screwing over tenants by preventing them from raising a deposit whilst using the profits you earn off them to raise property prices overall, so you earn from holding the property and renting it. It's reprehensible because it's making it impossible for people to get on with having quiet, secure lives with just enough for themselves and their families.

That absolutely does not mean individual landlords are all awful people - they're just people, trying to get along like anyone else, some are lovely and some are awful. But the market & buy to let concept/market as a whole is horrible and I would be upset too.

[RainyDayBear]

I think the unfairness of that would annoy me too, OP. We own a house (in Yorkshire, where thankfully it's all a bit more sane) and I remember feeling bad when I saw that the price of renting next door on right move was more than our mortgage. The housing situation in this country is really shit. There are pros to renting as PPs have mentioned, but YANBU to feel a bit frustrated by discovering that.

[ssd]

I agree this is shit and would really get me down too

[onemorecupofcoffeefortheroad]

Buying a house is a massive commitment and responsibility. There there will be other costs the owners have to bear such as building insurance, maintenance costs etc. Plus the costs of transaction when buying and selling and the deposit they will have put down in the first place.

[LoisWilkersonsLastNerve]

It's not really anything to do with the LL, its about how you feel about your situation which yanbu to feel annoyed about. There needs to be some control of rent imho but it won't happen sadly.

[Humidseptember]

But op you have no idea of the LL situation do you! Its rotten of you to judge.

your rent is really cheap around here!

Mortages have only gone down in recent years, to very low % in 2008 they were much higher. How do you know this LL has not inherited or slogged away at this rent for their pension as they have nothing else?

We may rent out our house one day and you would be paying considerably more than your current rent, and if you opened our post, you would find our mort is lower than the rent. HOwever we have nothing else and would probably be renting elsewhere ourselves as we cant afford to move. If we did live somewhere else we bought then this house would be MY pension as I have nothing.
We have lived scrapping the bone for years now, I never get my hair cut, or go to hair dressers, I have just treated myself to a new night dress in teh tu sainsbo sale!! £9 and I felt guilty I have just thrown out - a hole ridden, worn through night dress I have for four years. But our mort is low!!!

So you are being crazy to judge.

[BewtySkoolDropowt]

So you would be happier to live there if that letter didn't exist because the property was fully paid up and the landlords costs were lower?

If you move, how are you going to broach the subject how what the landlords costs are?

What profit would you deem reasonable?

[splintergrunt]

You are comparing apples and pears... You can't judge someone's life based on this - or your own life and you shouldn't try.

Envy is the thief of joy and all that...

Count your blessings and work towards your own dreams in your own way.

[JackShit]

You can't defend the indefensible. I'd be pissed off too OP.