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to think she could have taken the parcel in?

(41 Posts)
froubylou Sat 24-Sep-16 14:10:36

Had a card for attempted delivery yesterday. delivery driver been back today and told me my ndn refused to take it in. It was boots so not a huge box or heavy.

I work from home so am usually around to take my own parcels in. And everyone else's including hers. I think I have taken in as many for her as she has for me. Including a massive park hamper last Christmas early on a Sunday morning. Which I had balanced on the stairs to stop ds opening it for about 6 hours when they came home 4 hours later. When I finally went round and asked if they could come and take it as it was in the way and I wanted to vacuum the stairs they told me they were just sorting out space for it and could it wait for a couple of hours.

Anyway. She refused to sign for my parcel yesterday. I was at my other ndn house earlier on in the week at an Anne summers party and actually stuck up for her over something silly (party game she clearly didn't want to do and I said she shouldn't have to if she didn't feel comfortable).

Am aibu to be a bit pissed off with her? She is a funny onion sometimes and will either blank me on the street or say a very forced hello. I get the distinct feeling she doesn't like me though I have no idea why. Am not going to lose sleep over it or anything but am a bit pissed off.

I wouldn't be as petty as to refuse deliveries for her in the future but might be overly nice when handing them over and say I took it in because I know how annoying it is to miss one.

And obviously if it's a problem for her I will make a note on future deliveries to say not to take them to her if I am not home.

gleam Sat 24-Sep-16 14:13:25

Why not be petty?

NoFuchsGiven Sat 24-Sep-16 14:14:03

Maybe she was on her way out and didn't know what time she would be back for you to retrieve it. I don't think she was bu though, it could have been for any reason she didn't want to sign for it.

user1471461436 Sat 24-Sep-16 14:15:08

I would be annoyed too. Could she possibly feel like she wanted to stick up for herself at the party and have her face on with you?

Scarydinosaurs Sat 24-Sep-16 14:15:38

Be petty.

BingBongBingBong Sat 24-Sep-16 14:16:37

YABU. I've had to refuse parcels before (I do take them when I can) if I'm rushing out or not going to be back until late or something. Occasionally I've refused as I've taken a few in for various neighbours already that week and can't be arsed. I wouldn't think anything more of it OP

BreakfastAtSquiffanys Sat 24-Sep-16 14:17:54

Maybe she thought the parcel contained numerous sex toys ordered at Ann Summers party...

FasterThanASnakeAndAMongoose Sat 24-Sep-16 14:19:09

Funny onion! Stealing that grin

Nah YANBU. Be petty.

froubylou Sat 24-Sep-16 14:19:44

I won't be petty because I have to live next door to her. And because life is easier if I am not!

Delivery driver (who was more annoyed than me!) said ndn dp asked why she wouldn't take it and she just said she was 'sick of it'. Maybe she was having a bad day, I don't know.

It just seems an unkind thing to do really.

biscuitkumquat Sat 24-Sep-16 14:21:07

I would say something to her.

Ask her if she would prefer that you don't accept parcels for each other from now on?

She either has to say that she would prefer that. In which case, you can let couriers know (but obviously don't accept any for her), or she will let you know why she didn't accept yours yesterday.

froubylou Sat 24-Sep-16 14:23:34

Anne Summers stuff will be delivered to my other ndn so definitely not that.

I did feel sorry for her at party. She was bright red and on the verge of tears at thought of doing the game. But she is younger than most of the other guests and not as loud and lewd so assumed I was doing her a favour. Next time I won't bloody bother.

Bailey101 Sat 24-Sep-16 14:26:51

I was going to say that she's maybe going away for a few days and didn't want you to be without your parcel, but after your update if she's sick of taking in parcels, then you might as well be sick of taking hers.

BestZebbie Sat 24-Sep-16 14:27:39

How many parcels do you get, for her to get sick of it? Or is her neighbour on the other side bombarding her daily?

froubylou Sat 24-Sep-16 14:30:41

Biscuit I really CBA.

I had really vile ndn a few years ago. I get on really well with my ndn the other side, she is becoming quite a close friend. I don't want to make anyone feel uncomfortable or embarrassed about what might have been the wrong thing at the wrong time on the wrong day.

I suspect she doesn't like me as I don't let my 12 yr old dd play with her 5 yr old dd anymore. Her dd is far too young for my dd and her friends and they are obviously allowed around the block and over the the shops etc. Her dd isn't unless my dd is but I don't want my dd to have to be responsible for her dd iyswim. And I did explain why.

But obviously it is a problem for her. Am sure she will get the message when couriers don't try her and walk past to go to ndn but 1 if I am ever not home again.

Am a bit sensitive atm (family stuff going on) so don't want to react really and blow something up out of proportion.

froubylou Sat 24-Sep-16 14:33:36

Best not many! She has probably taken in 4 or 5 over almost 2 years. I have probaby taken in similar for her.

Hera tend to be big heavy boxes too. Her Avon (she is a rep) regularly gets dropped here.

The last one she took in for me was a pack of light bulbs. And that was about 3 months ago!

FrancisCrawford Sat 24-Sep-16 14:33:56

That's really petty of her. Taking a parcel in is such a small thing to do but can be a big hassle if it goes back. It was unkind and thoughtless of her. Clearly she isn't bothered about being a good neighbour

bloodyteenagers Sat 24-Sep-16 14:36:26

I stopped taking in parcels. It was after a week of answering the door at least 10 times a day to be asked to take in various packages and of course, the people knocking to get the packages. I couldn't ignore the door because I was expecting people. In the end I said no more.

CrazyNameCrazyGuy Sat 24-Sep-16 14:46:16

Petty or not I'd stop taking in parcels for her.

I'd also state on any deliveries that they are to be delivered to No. X (rather than her) - obviously with the agreement of the relevant neighbour.

We are always taking parcels in for people in the street (elderly father who is at home most of the day). It's not a problem for us as long as they collect within 24 hours or so.

ThumbWitchesAbroad Sat 24-Sep-16 14:54:09

I would definitely not take parcels for her from now on. Petty or not!

If she's so "sick of it" then you can be sick of it too. How very rude of her!

But if you do take them in, then drop notes through her door to say you need them picked up immediately, or you'll leave them on her doorstep, as you don't have the space for her stuff.

And yes to making sure no one attempts to leave parcels with her again.

TwatbadgingCuntfuckery Sat 24-Sep-16 14:56:55

she just said she was 'sick of it'

here is your answer.

Don't accept the parcels.

I refuse to for one neighbour. but the rest I am happy to because they are polite about it. NDN kicked off once because I didn't accept their parcel of medical supplies. I had just locked up and had a taxi waiting. Driver was OK. Of course they had a 'book redelivery' note. Neighbour kicked off at me for not taking it in. I think they assumed because I work from home they don't have to wait in for parcels hmm

Bogeyface Sat 24-Sep-16 14:57:58

I would refuse to take anymore in. Its not petty, its going along with what she clearly wants.

AcrossthePond55 Sat 24-Sep-16 14:58:45

When she said she was 'sick of it' is it possible that there is another neighbour she's constantly taking in packages for and you got caught in the fallout?

If not, I think you are reasonable to stop taking hers. But I do think I'd probably speak to her about it along the lines of "I understand that you'd prefer not to receive packages for others. Not a problem with me so in the future I'll not expect you to take in mine and I won't take in yours. Problem solved" <toothy, neighbourly smile>.

I'm with you on the DD front. Had this when I was growing up. There were three of us within a year or so of each other. A neighbour had a child about 5-6 years younger that she'd constantly send out 'to play' with us. Really put a crimp in our 'style'. My mum finally spoke to the other mother about the 'free babysitting'.

Arfarfanarf Sat 24-Sep-16 15:01:07

you don't want to be petty but she is happy to be?

so you don't want her to be cross for you treating her how she is treating you?


she is fine with it. I don't see how it's different for you.

froubylou Sat 24-Sep-16 15:04:21


I really want to take a parcel in for her. Just so she has to come and ask for it and I can smile sweetly and say how neighbourly it is to take them in and how annoying it is to miss them.

Plus it might be for her dp who wanted to take it in.

Just a bit upset that someone can be so petty when we live so close. But I am a bit out of sync at the moment due to other stuff going on so probably over sensitive.

I think a couple of weeks ago I would have been pissed off angry. Today I am pissed off upset.

FannyFifer Sat 24-Sep-16 15:08:41

Dinnae be a mug, do not take another parcel in for her.

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