Not all childless friends, just this group!
I have a small group of friends from a previous job. They were a large part of my social life for several years and we were very close for a time. However, a lot changed when I had DD.
First of all, I ebf DD which left me unable to leave her. I couldn't go on nights out etc which I was fine with. My friends visited when DD was a few weeks old and I met up with them for lunches on a couple of occasions when DD was small. As she got a little older - probably around 5/6 months - they tolerated her less and less and were noticably annoyed if I had to split my attention between them and her while we were out.
My DD didn't feed to a schedule and she was a very reluctant weaner so I didn't leave her at all until she was nearly 1. At that time, I started to go out on my own again (yay!) and saw them occasionally for meals, shopping trips etc. I was very careful to not talk about DD a lot and I asked them about their lives - I was genuinely interested and loved hearing about what they'd been up to. I couldn't really go out drinking the way I used to as 1) I was still bf in the morning 2) I didn't want a hangover with a child to look after and 3) I just didn't want to. They would occasionally ask after DD but showed no enthusiasm for seeing her which was fine but then I'd get snide comments about how I'm always "too busy" yet I've seen X and Y. Yes, because X and Y like to socialise with DH and DD so we can all do something together. There were also "Oh we saw one of your mummy friends tagged you on facebook and you'd been out with them...." Yes, on a Wed morning when you're all at work!
Fast forward a year and I'm pregnant again and it has been a really bad pregnancy - worse than last time. I've cancelled plans with them - I've cancelled plans with lots of people! Again, there have been snide comments about me seeing mummy friends. I look after my DD M-F while DH works so it has often been easier to meet up with mummy friends since I have to entertain DD anyway. Evenings and weekends DH has taken over to let me rest and I haven't been up to seeing anyone when I haven't had to.
I understand that I'm the one who has changed what AIBU to distance myself (more than I already have)?
Please or to access all these features
Please
or
to access all these features
AIBU?
AIBU to stop seeing childless friends?
68 replies
mickeygoseek · 23/09/2016 18:09
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MariaCameFromNashville ·
23/09/2016 22:32
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