I'm so sorry but I'm posting for traffic.
I cannot afford legal advice and I have been trying to get through to rights of women for weeks.
Current sitauon is that mediation is breaking down as ex insists on total split of dc time, they are 6 and 1. I work 3.days with a lot of flexible working and ex works full time with a great deal of overtime and limited flexibility. Currently they spend eoweekend and Tuesday nights with him.
Apart from verbally abusive and physically violent behaviour towards me, which I have police reports etc, not towards them, I would argue on a practical level its just not feasible. He never returns forms so ds has missed out on clubs etc as I didn't know they had gone home in his book bag; he has never taken them to the docs, dentists, play date, after school activity I do basically everything for them and always have.
My dd 1, nearly 2, cries whenever I leave the room when she is wth me and seems to be suffering from separation anxiety.
I think they will benefit from a continuation of the current arrangement on a practical level, as I would rather not argue it on the fact he has been extremely frightening and abusive towards me. So much so i have cctv installed outside my house as a deterrent.
Ex says I am not that main carer. That he will aggressively fight me in court and tell everyone 'what I'm really like'. He says he will get shared care anyway whether we go to court or I agree before.
I cannot afford representation. I would prefer not to bring up the past as I find it to be a really traumatic memory and I am just coming through all the fear I felt in the family home. Also I am not proud of my reaction to continual verbal abuse. I left with the kids at the beginning of the year.
If anyone can help me or tell me their recent experience as things seemed to have changed so much I would be so very gratrful. I just don't know where to turn.
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Please please help - bullying ex, shared care and going to court
27 replies
Theladyloriana · 20/09/2016 13:13
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